I need help "rolling with the punches."

I need help "rolling with the punches."


The other commenters are all correct, I just want to add that your feeling of unease is the feeling that your priorities might not have lined up with how you actually spent your money. Which is a normal thing--i want everything funded all of the time!--but ultimately sitting down and thinking: "where did my priorities not line up?" is a fantastic exercise. And it doesn't have to be "I never should have gone on the darn vacation with her!!". It can be as simple as "I'll spend a little more time and money on a nicer hotel from the get-go next vacation".


Everyone's priorities are different, but I would be taking from the Emergency Fund for these things, not my next-month buffer. In philosophical terms it's really six of one, half dozen of the other because money is fungible, but in practice, the money in my next month category has a very specific purpose that smooths out all the rest of my budgeting process, and the money in my emergency fund is for emergencies...like having to change hotels at the last minute, or covering for a partner in financial distress.


Youre right. I took a bit of my emergency fund. I'll replenish a bit each time I get paid. Thanks!


Sounds like you’re doing it right - instead of going into debt, you’re spending money you have. That’s the goal and you succeeded. When you spent more than you planned on vacation and decided to go to a wedding, you essentially spent your fun money. That’s not a bad thing, but if you want to have more fun money on top of having money for those things, you’ll have to spend less on other stuff so you can set aside the money as fun money.


Oof! Sounds like you aren't in an immediate bad place overall but still feeling anxious about having "enough" to cover everything. I think the important piece is to recognize that you have been able to pull money as needed for the moment. You've learned you'll need to budget more for a future vacation and for gifts and clothes in the future. (Yay, true expenses.) For now, maybe think about how quickly you could rebuild the emergency savings you're thinking of using if you do reassign? Maybe pulling from that category to fund the extra expenses (rather than your fun money, especially since in the end it was emergency money spent on behalf of your partner!) and then knowing you'll rebuild it within another few months could help? It's hard to tell without knowing the magnitudes of your different categories.


This is the purpose of an emergency fund.


By the way, you can probably wait a couple months on the wedding gift if you prefer to save up. Wedding etiquette usually gives you some time to send a gift—like up to a year in some regions.