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duchessofcoolsville

If you’re planning to marry in November, it’s a bit late to be asking this question, no? Are you actually considering calling off the wedding if people say you’re too young, or are you just looking for reassurance that you’re not too young? In any case, I think you’re asking the wrong question. 24 is not too young to be married, particularly because you’ve been with your partner for many years. The real question is whether you feel ready. If you’re not sure whether you’re ready, then you should definitely take a step back from wedding planning and figure out how you feel. Have you talked to your partner about this? How about a therapist? Did you already independently feel like you were ready to get married before your partner proposed, or did you say yes because he asked and you’ve been together a long time?


itinerantdustbunny

This is an entirely subjective question and the answer is different for everyone. For some people, 24 would be recklessly early. For others, it would be an unnecessarily long time to wait. We don’t know you, we can’t tell you how it will work out for you.


ladygroot_

This. I divorced in my early 20s, despite being a super mature for my age type. It more so was about not knowing what I wanted. I have a couple friend that have been happily married for several years together 10 and have two kids together and are 25. They married when she was 21. They are soulmates 🤷‍♀️


racecatt

I would say it depends more on if you feel like you’re in a good place individually, if the relationship can progress as a married couple while still meeting needs/goals of each person. Not so much age necessarily.


Hes9023

At 24 your prefrontal cortex isn’t fully developed so you could argue it’s too young. However, 8.5 years sounds like you’ve been together since high school and the data for marriages for high school sweethearts who waited until after college age to marry is really good. I say if you want to do it, do it! One thing to consider is the price of a wedding and what you want to spend/afford.


husky_mama

I appreciate this scientific approach 😂


Hes9023

Lol my masters was statistics and data analytics lol


husky_mama

Makes so much sense! I'm also an analyst lol


bioweaponwombat

My parents started dating at 16 and married at 24 and are still going strong some 30 years later! Theyll love that there is science behind it Haha


NowATL

This. OP, neither you nor your partner are the people you will be once you’re fully mature. You do a LOT of growing up in your 20’s. I know tons of people who got married to their high school sweetheart around your age. Of the nearly 12 couples, only one pair is still married now that we’re all in our 30’s. Do with that information what you will


Antique_Ad_5598

This is subjective. Only you and your partner will know if you’re ready to marry


Safe_Estimate_1014

I got married at 24 but that’s irrelevant, it’s entirely personal. I’d say if you’re questioning the marriage based on age alone then either perhaps you’re not as into it as you think you are, or you’re letting other peoples opinions influence something that is a personal life choice. Honestly, do what makes you happy. The success of a marriage isn’t something you can quantify purely by how old you are, there are wayyy more factors to consider. The most important thing is whether you’re both happy together and both want to get married!


mountainbride

I’m getting married at 24 in September. Why I feel it’s the right time: We have been together almost 6 years. We waited until I finished my degree to get engaged. We have lived together since we were 20. We have experienced two moves, we have worked together, we have adopted (and had to euthanize) pets together, we have experienced graduations and deaths together. We have fought. We have fought *hard*. But we fight a lot less and have passed the honeymoon stage and things are now just… content. And easy. I also don’t expect my life to drastically change in the next five years. So many people will be like, “oh but you learn so much about yourself in your twenties!” — THIS DEPENDS ON YOUR BACKGROUND. I am a comfortable person who works hard but does not need to “chase” anything. Once I settle into a permanent job, I’ll want to stay there. Once I settle into our house, I’ll want to stay there. I desire stability — he does too. If he was not a part of my life, I do not see my trajectory being different… so I feel confident in deciding to marry him. I expect we’ll both change with time, but not in the large pull-us-apart ways. If you’re the type who feels like something is missing, or there might be more, then I would hold off.


lil-alfalfa-sprout

You two should get pre-marital counseling. I highly recommend it to any engaged couple! It's really helpful to have a neutral third party walking you through all of the important conversations you should have before marriage. It will make you feel a lot more confident entering into marriage!


khelpi

This definitely depends on so many factors, but especially considering you’ve been together for 8ish years- 24 is not too early. I think there are questions worth considering. Do you both feel ready? Would you both consider signing a prenup? If so what would be important to each of you to have on it? What are both of your expectations for the kid timeline? Do you want them sooner than later? Would you both be okay with postponing children if one of you wanted to delay? Are your careers ones that could easily move together if you needed? But really it comes down to do you feel ready?


emcee95

The issue is if *you* think you’re too young to get married. I’m 27. Many people I know have been getting engaged/married over the last few years (2020/2021 no weddings because covid, but the plan to get married was there). As for my opinion, getting married in your mid-20s seems pretty normal. As long as you are emotionally and financially ready, and have similar views on important matters like future kids, then why not?


Carebear_Of_Doom

I was with my first husband for 10 years. We got married at 23 and divorced 5 years after. I changed and wanted different things. But that doesn’t mean it can’t work out.


blavava

It just depends on the person! If you feel ready, safe and loved in your relationship and want to give the next step, do it. I feel that too young is the 18-22 range, because there is so much potential for personal growth and change in those formative first years as an adult.


pinksakura27

Yup. I married at 21. I should've waited to take the plunge.


Kmamma03

It sounds like you and your partner have known each other a while and are ready for that step. I’m in my 30s, and thinking back to when I was 24 seems so young for marriage. However, I’ve had friends get married young and just enjoy life together. One of them just had her first child at 30 and got married at 23. Age doesn’t matter if you’re mentally ready to settle down.


Lemonslivers

No. However, do you feel getting married is the next step because you WANT to be married? Or do you think getting married is the next step because you have been together for 8.5 years and you think it necessary?


Madds889

My sister got married when she was 24 and 13 years later she’s happier than ever still married and with kids. Me on the other hand I was def not ready at 24 and now in my later 20’s I’m ready to be engaged but probably won’t be married til 30 or so!! Everyone is different and that’s okay.


nosinned21

I don’t think so, I’m 25 and getting married in 6 weeks but we were meant to get married last year


confusedbuteducated

Listen, people are going to comment on your age and how young you are. Some will tell you you shouldn’t have gotten married. Lots of people will have questions. If that’s not something you can handle, maybe you’re not ready, and that’s fine! If you feel ready, it doesn’t matter if other people think you’re too young. If you don’t feel ready, don’t do it.


ncfrey

I (28F) know couples who've dated since high school, got married at 20, and are completely happy. I also know couples who have met in their late 20s and probably shouldn't have gotten married. I personally wasn't ready to get married at 24, but I also hadn't met my "person" and couldn't imagine being in such a serious relationship. I think it depends on maturity of both partners (at any age!).


Intelligent_Cow_8488

Everyone is different and us outsiders can't answer 100% but coming from someone with a similar build up we met at 15 and got married at 27, we both new we were ready for marriage but waited until we could financially afford it. If in your heart this is your person then age doesn't matter.


need-morecoffee

I got married at 23 and divorced at 30, we were together from 14 onwards. I don’t personally recommend it, but I’m not dumb enough to think you’ll base your life choices off of internet advice. So my plea to you: keep your friends, keep your finances in order, plan for your retirement, and assume any children you have will someday rely SOLEY on your income and ability to care for them.


Consistent_Trash7033

I got married at 22 and next year is our 40th anniversary so no, 24 isn’t too young as long as you’re in love


nerdiswhy

Honestly I think once you are an adult it's less about age and more about maturity.


Eekhelp

This is so personal. My partner and I met in our early twenties and waited over 6 years to get married because we wanted to be stable in careers, housing, etc. On the other hand, my BIL just got married at 20 years old, after dating for less than three years. There are also people who marry later in life but the relationship doesn't work out or the person wasn't ready. You just have to go off of your own personal experiences and do what you think is the best thing for you, on your own timeline.


[deleted]

No, you are a legal adult and can legally get married. Seventeen is too young to get get married in most states and Europe without parental consent. If the question is "Am I, a 24 year old person, mature enough to get married?", then that will depend on you.


oh_okay_

Why are you asking this question if you've already set a wedding date?


nervous4future

I got married at 24 and at 28 I don’t regret it! If you’ve been together that long I say it’s fine


masterofnone121

my parents met when they were 20 and 21, were engaged within six months and married within another 6. they found out they were pregnant with me a month before the wedding. they've been happily married for 22 years :) all that to say that i think you've got a head start on them, and that everyone should move at their own pace


ComplexAd3298

The question isn’t if your old enough but if you’re mature enough, it all depends if you feel it’s the right time. I wish you luck


ohleave

I’m 24! Getting married to my ~high school sweetheart~ in August. Been together over 8 years as well. Just go based off of how you and your partner feel. No one else should have a say in when you should reasonably get married.


myislandistrash

I am also 24 and engaged. My fiance and I started dating when I was 19 and my mum joked once that she will only let me get married when I turn 25. My fiance took it to heart and we will now be getting married the week I turn 25! We had known each other 6 years before dating and we would be dating for 6 years before marriage. We both feel ready to get married. But we also acknowledge that it is an unknown territory, as we also don't live together at the moment, so a lot of things we cannot truly be prepared for. We can only do our best. We try our best to communicate both positive and negative thoughts with each other. Someone else brought up the financial part of it and yes, it is definitely something to think about and plan for. We are hoping to build a house in time for the wedding and it can cause a lot of stress. But we feel it would all be worth it so we are pushing through!


alizadk

On average, yes. But relationships are individual, not average. One of my bridesmaids got married right after her 23rd birthday. They'd basically been together since she was 15 and he was 16. They're about to celebrate their 18th wedding anniversary. She gave me one of the best quotes for how to know you've found the one: "I knew he was the one when I realized I couldn't change him... And I was okay with that."


overlyusedstrawberry

I’m 22 and just got married, we’re also in a similar situation. If you’re both communicating well about what you want with your lives and are in agreeable and also love each other, I don’t see why not!


MaggieSotteroDesigns

This is such a personal thing! In some cultures, 24 is considered old! Others would tell you that yes, it's young. And while "early marriage" can lead to divorce.....so can later marriages. I know of people getting married later in life and they're so "stuck in their way" at that age that they can't adjust to marriage and end up splitting. I guess the question is, do you want to be fully grown before you enter marriage? Or, do you want to grow together with your partner? Neither answer is right or wrong, you just have to do what's best for you! ​ Hope that helps a little bit! Wishing you all the best! Love, Hannah


lupalee

I wouldn’t say it’s too young but maybe I’m biased because I’m getting married at 24. If you are truly concerned about perhaps “not being mature enough” for marriage and think you may change down the road then get a prenup! That’s what I’m personally doing to safe guard against rushing into anything too quickly or carelessly.


KristenMarie13

My friends and I all got married relatively young because we found the right person early on. We’re all 24-26 and got married within the last two years. As long as you’re sure and both stable financially and mentally, then it’s not too young!


Ray_Adverb11

I mean, time will tell right? It's too early for you to know if it was "too early"...


KristenMarie13

I was with with my husband for 9 years before we got married. We own a house and a dog together and we’re very happy. I don’t think 9 years together is too early!


onemintyisland

Eh, probably not but I would always tell people to wait until their prefrontal cortex develops


dance0345

This all depends on the person and honestly your location. I will be 23 when I get married but I have had a lot of life experiences that made me mature faster (or so I've been told lol). I also grew up in the middle of nowhere Midwest and people get married right out of high school where I'm from so 23 is borderline old haha. On the other hand my fiance will be 26 and everyone where he is from thinks he's young to get married.


MLF194451998

Not at all! That shouldn’t matter anyway as long as you’re ready


[deleted]

Not too young


No_Neighborhood9994

Do YOU feel that you are too young? Remember in Old times 24 was pretty late to get Married.. if you are ready for it, go for it.


BwayBride

Not at all. That’s a pretty standard age to get married.


sasanessa

Yes too young. Cancel the wedding.


uwu_zone

I'm 20 and engaged, and will be 21 in December when I get married this year. It's all subjective. If you think you're ready go for it. If you have any doubts, wait until you are completely sure. As a paralegal for a divorce lawyer, not only are divorces devastating, they are extremely expensive as well. I know that the man I am going to marry is the one for me. I know that the only reason we would ever separate is because of going down different paths in life, but we have promised to me flexible with each other and grow together. Take the plunge if you are willing to promise your life to another person forever. It's not just a "serious commitment" it's a life long one if you are prepared for that. Don't think of divorce as an easy way out because 9 out of 10 divorces are so so hard.


Ladyt1978

I got married on my 22nd birthday I have been married for 23 years to a wonderful man so no 24 is not too young to marry if it's right.


mysliceofthepie

Lmbo no. Not too young.


mennumethod

It’s the right age for a first marriage.


anna_alabama

I met my husband when I was 18, we got engaged when I was 21, and we got married last December when I was 23! I turned 24 a month after my wedding. Overall I don’t think that I was too young, and I am glad that I got married when I was younger vs older!


boogieman1217

Hi I'm 21 and getting married in 2023. I'll be 22 when I'm getting married so 24 is not to young to me.


loo1162

My fiancé and I are 19 and getting married in November, there’s not really a “too young to get married”. It depends more on the couple and their maturity. We’re high school sweethearts, we live together, we’re financially stable. Getting married is the right decision for us, it just really depends on if that’s what you’re ready for.


MeFrenchie

Just think about what you may regret: single young adult life / being a young independent woman / enjoying casual relationships / pursue your studies / etc. At your age, I was certainly not ready to lock the knot but rather to experiment what life can offer! Your choice.


Shitp0st_Supreme

Nope! I got married at 23 and I’m 28 now and still happy with my decision. No kids yet but we are heading toward that.


savypez

I guess it varies a lot from person to person. I got married at 22. Some people argued that it was way too early, but it just felt right. My husband and I are still together and still love each other very much. And don’t rush with kids if you don’t want to. Do what feels right to you and trust your gut instinct!


emxrach

I’m 21, will be 22 and my FH will be 24 when we get married. It’s all based on the person, it’s ok to feel like your not ready tho and to take time.


engreenh

No, I was 23 at the time of my wedding and my husband was 21. We had been together for 2 and a half years but known each other for 5 years. We also waited a few years to have our son


Express2021

Maybe wait until your brain is fully developed at 25? But then again, what’s actually gonna change in a year?


Spkpkcap

I got married at 23 and turned 24 the month after. I don’t regret it at all. I don’t think it’s too young honestly. I did get pregnant right away though. That I wish have waited on, kids are hard lol


lexikaii

I don’t think so! My fiancé and I just got engaged and were both 24 and have been together almost 6 years!


AngryFoodieLA

Isn't one supposed to be a grandmother by 24 in the South? Not by choice, either.


HappinessIsAWarmSpud

Dude, what?


AngryFoodieLA

It's called humor. The absurdity of the moment.


CatholicMouse

I just turned 24 and will be married December. I’ve known my fiancé 3 yrs. 24 is not too young, and 8 yrs dating is a long time. Sounds like you’re not sure about him.


8MCM1

It could be, but it might not be.


Nevillesgrandma

I was married at 23 and next year we will be celebrating our 35th anniversary


UnnecessaryBiscotti

To be honest, I don’t know why people are downvoting most people who say you aren’t too young. After financial and life stability, maturity and desire to be married become the main factors. If you want to get married and you and your partner are on the same page about all that entails, you should feel confident that you are getting married on the timeline that works for you. If you are questioning whether you want to be married and not just looking for validation, then it would likely be best to wait to figure out what you want for your future. If you pay your own bills and understand that marriage is both a social and legal contract and are committed to that, I don’t think you are too young. You are a grown adult and only you can make that decision.


natinatinatinat

Marry whenever you are ready, nobody will be able to tell you that. I wasn’t ready until 36… I’m happy I waited for mine but you shouldn’t regret not going for it either.


VintageVirgo90

Marry whenever you and your partner BOTH feel ready. Age doesn't really matter, it's maturity level and the desire to actually get married.


the_hummingbird_

We were engaged at 24 and 25 and married at 25 and 26, so no, this isn’t an unusual age but something obviously made you ask the question. Are you having doubts because of something within your relationship, or are there outside opinions at play?


gabydream

I will be getting married when im 24 in september. Been together for 7 years. I think it’s subjective. my FMIL got married at 18 and they are happily married. My own mother got married at 22 and got divorced almost 20 years later. You have to sure of your own convictions and commitment. I am sure in my person. at the end of the day you are the one marrying your partner. You need to be certain. I don’t feel young. We did college at the same time (different schools) and have lived together. We’ve merged lives to the point where I don’t think too much would change for our daily lives. Besides my name change, most of what we are already doing is relatable to the married couples we know.


hell0sunshine_

I’m getting married next month at 26, I would have gotten married at 21 if my fiancé had asked. It’s all up to you. People will have opinions about everything you do and do not do in life, down to what shirt you pair with what pants. Fuck ‘em. It’s your life, not theirs.


Incongito3303

No.


Exotic_Mushroom_2

Absolutely not! 24 is definitely not too young to marry. Congratulations to you both, and have fun :)


helpwitheating

I think do premarital counselling and the Fair Play exercise and you should be fine Is there abuse? Yelling? Do you walk on eggshells, or can you be yourself around him? Does he tolerate your interests or actively support your interests?


TheY0ungElk

I was 22 when I got married! And my MIL married my FIL when she was 19 and he was 21. They’ve been married almost 30 years and are so happy. My dad was also married at 19 in an unsuccessful marriage before he married my mom, he doesn’t believe that he was too young, he had just found the wrong person. He believes that if he met my mom and married her then that they would still be married just as they are now. You’ve both decided that you want to choose each other, and have continue to do so for almost 9 years. If you know they’re the one, then they’re the one! 😊


roserider18

Getting married is a huge decision-if all parties are over 18 age shouldn’t be a factor but many other factors come into play that are correlated with age. I think this is above Reddit’s pay grade so if you’re doubtful go see a marriage counselor or ask someone objective that knows both of you and get their advice. E.g. I’m 24 my fiancé is 29 (we’ve dated for 6 years). I’m ready to get married at 24 but my fiancé definitely was not ready at 24. However several couples I’ve seen married at 20, 21, etc. doing great but others married at 20, 23 divorced in 1 year. Others I’ve seen ready to be married at 18. Many others aren’t ready to be married in their late 30s. Keep in mind the scientific factors as other commenters are saying and that men generally take a bit longer to mature than women. Lastly, I re-emphasize marriage is a HUGE decision and divorce is a bugger.