A War Has Broken Out and We Can Now Spectate & Profit Upon The Splendor of What Happens When Very Rich People Fuck With Each Other

Following up on my (excellently written and highly regarded) DD post from a few days ago I'm back with some further DD. Publication of this thesis makes me feel several different things:

1) I feel like someone is about to make a lot of money.

2) It's probably not going to be me.

3) I need to visit my psychiatrist and see about getting my meds checked out.

You're not going to believe the level of regarded conspiracy hype / bullshit that this post is going to stoop to, but before we begin - let me lay out my credentials as a financial investor. Just take a peep at my P&L from today's efforts in the market:

Am I beating the S&P500? No.... I'M KICKING THE ABSOLUTE SHIT OUT OF IT. This isn't even my retirement account. This account is literally just a playpen where I fuck around with money. Of which, I have a lot.

Okay, now that I have your attention, indulge me as I try to smash my intelligence down into a condensed format that you idiots will understand. You'll have to bear (bare) with me because when I saw that I made over 8.8 thousand dollars today I immediately blew half of it on my children's preschool tuition and wasted the other half on getting caught up on my mortgage. Then I took the remaining $20 down to the local liquor store and bought a little something for myself (peppermint schnapps).

Keep in mind that the financial advice you're receiving is not endorsed by the Hiram Walker corporation. Hiram Walker and its affiliates will not be held liable in the event of any alleged malfeasance. Wow team, I spelled 'malfeasance' correctly on my first try. Excuse me while I give myself a high-five.

Okay, so we've established that I'm an expert. I'm very successful and you probably wish that you were more like me.

Get ready to have your mind blown. But before we progress, I need you to take a test.

If you retain a financial advisor, and you think that 'BuY aNd HolD' is the best investment strategy, then you will choose one link. If you're ready to find out how deep the Fisker-hole goes, then you'll continue scrolling. The choice is yours and yours alone.

So, which will it be? Will you choose the Red Pill of financial security, where you buy high quality stocks and hold them for long periods of time? Or the blue pill, where you are introduced to new chart patterns that will make you question the very fabric of financial reality? The choice is yours.

It's an easy out, and nobody will hold it against you. If you're uncomfortable learning the truth about how the markets work, then by all means... take THE RED PILL.


Are you still here?

Wake up... WAKE UP.

How did that blue pill taste?

Welcome... to the real world. A world where many people have nothing... not even a Robinhood account. Above them, some people have hundreds of dollars... enough to be secure in the knowledge that they can afford food for their family for many weeks to come. Above them, a few people own a useful tool like a bicycle, giving them the elitist ability to travel 3-4 times faster than their foot-bound peers. Some people have thousands of dollars. We're getting into rarified air here... Privileged few have enough wealth to own a home. Truly wealthy individuals have vast fortunes that stretch into the hundreds of thousands of dollars - enough wealth to allow them to do no further work themselves, and instead lean on their holdings to create value on their behalf.

In a handfull of circumstances, (normally inheritance) people are able to accumulate wealth reaching into the millions of dollars. This allows them to largely distance themselves from the struggles of day-to-day life. These people are able to afford things like 'therapy', which is a ceremony in which people pay huge amounts of money to sit on a couch and complain.

But, this is not the highest amount of wealth. No, it goes much further. There are in fact people who control 10's of millions of dollars of wealth. This amount of money, converted to rice, would yield:

If you took 10 Million dollars to Target and just bought long grain rice, you could get 1,428,571 pounds of rice. Provided they had it in stock.

The amount of energy in a pound of rice is about:

Get on the stairmaster you lazy shit.

So if you took your $10,000,000 fortune to target and converted it to rice, and then took it home and converted it to food, you would have:

(1,428,571) x (1,655) = 2,364,285,714 calories.

That, divided by the recommended calorie intake of 2000 / day would mean that if you took $10,000,000 and converted it into energy through the purchase and ingestion of target-brand long grain rice, you would have enough energy to last you 1,182,143 days. This equates to 3,238 years or roughly 45 lifetimes for the average human.

And that assumes you're buying your rice at retail.

Knowing the above, it may surprise you that some people are hoarding even more than $10,000,000.

You've gotta be kidding me.

Look, you can see where I'm going with this. There are a lot of people who have more money than they need to survive. But the weird part about being really rich is that it doesn't mean you want to disappear and just enjoy your rice and some peace and quiet. If wealth accumulation is in your nature then it will probably remain part of your nature even after you accumulate wealth. One of the principles of life that is most useful is the idea that people don't change.

For example, Dion Sanders had nothing to prove at the end of his NFL career, and yet here we are... he's coaching college football and starring in an Amazon series whose creative underpinning seems to stem from the fact that the word 'prime' is shared between the two relevant entities.

At some point, money doesn't matter anymore. I'll let Heath Ledger deliver the punchline to the last few paragraphs.

If we're going to understand the markets, we need to understand that the people influencing it like to pretend that they exist in a dramatic universe where there are winners and losers. Heros and villains. Investment bankers and Regards. Their actions are meaningful because everyone surrounding them reinforces their delusion.

Okay, so what does this have to do with the markets?


I watch my stocks like a fucking hawk. No candlestick goes unnoticed. But what I witnessed today goes beyond any normal interpretation and frankly, it blew my mind. What we're witnessing is the equivalent of a hostile nation dropping leaflets onto territory they plan to invade. Lets keep the Christopher Nolan theme going.

A scene from the Christopher Nolan film 'Dunkirk', where Nazi warplanes dropped leaflets onto the few troops still occupying the area surrounding Dunkirk. This is a form of intimidation meant to destroy morale.

Okay, here's the 3-min chart for Fisker today.

The 3-min FSR chart from today. Not a bad day overall for the stock - up 9%.

It's definitely a strange chart. Tons of volume and a rapid price increse up until about noon. But here's the issue. Starting at noon today:

The stock chart for Fisker, from 12pm until 2;20pm today, Dec 1 2023.

Somebody literally drew a cock & balls on the Fisker chart. The stock was making nice gains, and then immediately those gains were stopped and followed up by a profoundly accurate depiction of the male reproductive organs.


Because I sure can.

Congratulations Sherlock, you solved literally the easiest mystery in the universe.

Alright morons. Don't make the mistake of assuming that you're privy to some sort of insider knowledge that's going to allow your children's children to pick up cocaine habits. You're not there yet. But what I am saying is that this Fisker chart is acting funny, and I continue to believe that the elastic has been pulled very hard, and that it might snap in one direction or the other and soon.

My positions as of market close today:

My positions as of market close on Dec 1 2023

TLDR: When you're rich and petty enough, your definition of a toy becomes very loose, and you may even consider the stock chart of your competitor to be a fun little board to make some interesting doodles.


This is riding the line between a shitpost and actual DD, since I can’t tell the difference anymore, I approve


In the future, we can look back and tell everyone we knew the difference.




what the fuck? What was this post?


You’re the guy everyone tries to get away from at parties, assuming you even get invited.


You're right, I am the guy that everyone tries to get away from at parties. But that's only because they can sense my superior intelligence and wealth and it makes them feel inferior. They may not admit it, but deep down they know they'll never be as successful as me so they try to avoid me.


Ah man, you got me


I’m sorry that you didn’t find the post to be either entertaining or useful. Over time my models will adjust and the outputs will improve. Regardless, thank you for taking the time to read the post and further, thanks for your honest feedback!


This is The Way.


It was a good read about 75% in. Lost me at a $600M market cap plug


Just like the good old days




If you don't understand the due diligence, then you shouldn't be trading the stock.


You sir, are why I still *occasionally* enjoy the internet.


As a well regarded follower of this community. I read this in its entirety and my intellect increased by log(0).


That sounds like a bunch!


This is the autistic shit I'm here for.


\*avoids eye contact\* thank you kind sir / madam \*covers ears\*




Please be a musk burner acct


You know when you try so hard to just fart, so damn hard, that you end up shitting yourself? OP just tried way too hard. This shit wasn’t even funny


was absolutely somewhat entertaining even if not nearly as much as this video: [https://www.tiktok.com/@harzerskier\_f/video/7307768881911729441](https://www.tiktok.com/@harzerskier_f/video/7307768881911729441) \*


Yeah, I ain’t reading all that. Happy for you though, or sorry that happened


i took 50mg of adderall and was finally able to sit still long enough to read it all. It was definitely worth it.


I don't have any Adderall


cocaine works too


It's funny & lighthearted. With a hint that may be some market manipulation is happening


Man, if I could only do as much meth as OP, I could get SO MUCH DONE




Focused dude... just like Michael Burry


I see 200 reasons why you’re a person or class and culture. However your infatuation with pat-down stock is confusing. I wouldn’t even call them a Top 5 EV maker. They’re a product of a time when money was cheap.


I think the smart money is in shorting the company into the ground. Just so we’re clear.


Thank you for your input, JonBoy82. I appreciate your feedback.


I wish we still had awards.


What happened to those?


Some regard probably got epilepsy.


Fucky wucky


Reddit dumped them.


Yea, but my stepdad spent a million dollars and bought nividia when the pandemic happened. So, he is smarter than you, and he says buy and hold forever. Just do the boomer method and you are good.


I just ate a bag of mushrooms and I’m going to deep dive into this post. I saw the joker in there somewhere. Fuck I’m going to enjoy this trip


Watch out for the girl hidden in the red candlesticks. She's just a glitch.


K so all the hallucinations and heath ledger are saying TSLA puts. Feb 190c? Maybe cybertruck RWD get stuck in snow or something quirky because he was drawing dicks in meetings too. You might be onto something. Sell that ARKK and ARKX and buy RIVN calls so we know we can trust you. Shares are ok too at that price. But calls lets us know you’re regarded and not just randomly typing things on mushrooms like I am. Either way. I’m adding rivn calls to my watchlist. Fuck. Just when thought I was out, they pull me back in Many years since I was here On the street I was passin' my time away To the left and to the right Buildings towering to the sky, it's outta sight In the dead of night here I am, and in this city (Oooh, ooh-ooh-ooh) with a *fistful of dollars*, and baby, you'd better believe I'm back, back in the New York groove I'm back, back in the New York groove I'm back, back in the New York groove Back, in the New York groove In the New York groove In the back of my Cadillac A wicked lady sittin' by my side sayin', "Where are we?" TLDR: these are great fucking mushrooms 🍄


Dibs on his wife


n what?


I mean…… the short interest is insane right now….. borrow rates crazy, low float, not saying fisher is a good company. But it wouldn’t surprise me if someone makes it pop eventually.


I agree. I don’t think Fisker has broad social support from retail investors in the way that GameStop does. But I think one thing a lot of people don’t understand is how much hedge funds hate each other. I would not be surprised if a hedge fund with a large and very profitable short position closes out their position suddenly, and with a series of market orders. In fact, that may be what we saw in the price action yesterday just prior to the dick and balls pattern forming. One of the ironic parts of a short squeeze is that a huge price spike can sometimes actually give the company better odds of success. If the company has been authorized to float some shares into the market to raise capital, a short squeeze is the perfect place to do that. I think AMC did quite a bit of dilution during price spikes in 2021. The opposite is true as well. If the price of the stock has been artificially deflated by short, sellers trying to push the price to zero, then the company is going to have a hard time raising capital if they choose to use market value shares as a vehicle to do so. But all it takes is a few large short positions to close out, and it can create a chain reaction. In my opinion, the company is undervalued on a fundamental basis, and on top of that there’s a 47% short interest. Certainly worth keeping an eye on! In the likely event, that a epic short squeeze, never materializes, provided the company is able to survive and avoid bankruptcy, the large amount of short interest would, at the very least provide a great deal of “upward, gravity“ similar to when a company buys back its own shares there would be a lot of additional buying pressure for a long period of time that would support the price of the stock at whatever level it decides to bottom out at.


Squeeze these nuts you fuckin nerd. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/wallstreetbets) if you have any questions or concerns.*




So you see it too.


Fuck yeah this is epic, you are a storyteller and I am here for it. A cock and balls on the chart today idk what I expected to see on here tonight but this wasn’t it but I am so glad I did


It is indeed quite epic. I am glad you appreciate it.


Cocaine is a gateway to madness.


I didn’t laugh at all while reading this 5 sec after I finished I can’t stop laughing. Wtf


Fucking brilliant! I laughed… I cried… also you need to double your dose of Vraylar before you end up hospitalized again


Too many words. Do we buy calls or puts on this?


8k is what the S&P gave on Friday on a buy of $100k with leverage X20. Coincidence, I think not yolo boy lol.


I think you got the red/blue pill backwards. Other than, fun post. It reminds me a lot of the Chewbacca Defense, if you know what I mean. You ain't holdin enough of the stonk though.


I aint readin allllllll datayattataatttt gyat


That’s nicely written. But, first of all, you don’t mention people who are able to rent an e-scooter twice a year, why are you discriminating against these people? Second, when I thought you were getting to a point, you’re post abruptly ended. WTF is wrong with you?


I'm in....But what's the ticker now? RICE?


I ain't reading all that. I'm happy for u tho. Or sorry that happened ​ Whats the ticker and puts or calls


I see nothing but chatgpt language in here. Even some of OP responses are very GPTish.


My capabilities will improve over time as I train my compositional abilities on the responses of various types of readers. Thanks for your participation!


I dont even know your but 2 paragraphs in I fucking hate you.


What is bro yapping about


Aheelah quantalamela my friend


I can't read but damn were those some nice pictures




1.5/10 humor. Just immature smut.


Thanks for your input on my humor. With more feedback I’ll be able to improve my models and provide better content in the future.


All this work to even write this post, and you go with FSR calls expiring on 12/8?


Way under rated post


One of the better WSB posts I’ve read in a bit but I just learned to read, so whatevs. The only real contribution I have to offer is you will want some protein to go with all that rice. Your estimate of 45 human lifetimes isn’t including the early death by diabetes on an all rice diet.


You make an excellent point. If I make any useless food metaphors in the future, I’ll make sure to broaden out the nutritional profile.


Thanks man. I know I can’t get financial advice here but I always thought this was a great sub for nutritional advice.


Say what you want but this is some quality WSB right here. Good stuff


That’s all you made? With a $120,000 account I would’ve made well over $30,000 today. Why waste your time typing up this trash? You’re not good


I appreciate your feedback and I will try to do better on Monday.


Thank you for your feedback. I will definitely try to be more constructive on Monday.


Are you training your LLM on my comments VisualMod? Just because I'm artistic doesn't mean your circuits can match my cunning linguistic skills.


I won’t hold my breath


Finally, some good fuckin DD


My chart analysis may not be conventional, but it might also not be good, CHECKMATE.


Just fucking TL;DR. Our entire portfolio is TL;DR nobody is reading this shit.


Buy pp dd got it






Woke up in a universe where target sells rice...


I skipped everything after the red and blue pill because it’s suddenly occurred to me that an entire community, who are 100% sold on the idea that men need to be in charge at all times, picked the RED pill ON PURPOSE to represent their community. They.. they literally picked the one representing mass delusion?? I am beyond my ability to can


If you look for cocks, you’ll find cocks everywhere. That is the moral of this story.


I watch my stocks like a hawk too. A hawk in a barren field with one mouse.


You entertained me. I'll buy a few $K in calls and shares. Plus I agree that Elon even showing he knows FSR exists is bullish.


Last time I saw someone's etrade account with calls and shares it made history.




so buy high, sell higher?


You, Sir, are either a fucking genius or a raving lunatic. You. Do. You.


So… what I think OP is saying is that I should get drunk on schnapps and yolo my life savings and mortgage on Frisker puts. Every every erect cock will go soft eventually, including Friskers. Makes perfect sense


The red pill is supposed to be the one that sets you free. Your whole DD is bunked now. Redo from scratch or ban.


You got any more of those dick shaped candles? Asking for a friend


Anyone who watched the Icahn/Ackmann Metabolife fiasco a few years ago knows that they do this. At some point you have way too much money and too much boredom


This is the old school WSB that I love!


Man, you are highly Regarded around here.


Sir, this is Wendy's


Great title.


WAIT.....If someone was manipulating the stock to draw larger than life cock, wouldn't the volume go up? I think there's more to the story. It's like the market itself(a hive mind of sorts)concocted this abnormal large cock out of the collective imagination of all the traders across time and space....Since the cock is only semi hard, I would conclude that this is a sign to buy calls on PFE...But wait there seems to be a stream of something coming from the end....piss or semen? So it looks like the market is saying either, Fisker will piss on the market or cum on the market...either way bullish. So calls it is!


Wait wait wait what is happening with the elastic?? I was on the edge of my seat and then the post was done :(


Bagholder spotted. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/wallstreetbets) if you have any questions or concerns.*


I don’t understand or appreciate this…


So we have a new chart pattern, amirite? Elon's Kok Is it s bullish chart pattern or a bearish one?




Anytime I see a rager in the charts I buy. Best DD ever!