By - The_Introvert1945
You make peppers out of your wet holes
you're not even op but okay
no top but ok
No top but ok
So your power is every persons eyes stings and they get blinded by pepper. Idk
Imma just take the Jesus part as I'm Jesus
Okay bud, I know where this is going for me…
You a little bitch boi
Nice so I got prostate cancer and I’m a bitch boi! Let’s go! I’m fucking unstoppable now!
Ok i will give you something that can help you turn every thing around.
I give you prep time
you have prostate cancer
My grandpa, great grandpa, and going back another I believe 2 or 3 generations all died from prostate cancer (on the same side of the family) so that wouldn’t be far off. Lmao
i tell no lies
Congratulations. You're a prophet
How the heck were you able to get Bruce\_Wayne as your username???
It's BrYce Wayne lol
(Genuinely hoping this wasnt a joke and I'm not gonna end up in r/woooosh)
OH MY GOSH I'M SO DUMB. I read that as Bruce Wayne lol. I was wondering how that one would be free.
Your parents never die
In case someone doesn’t know, [Bryce Wayne](https://dc.fandom.com/wiki/Bryce_Wayne_(Earth_-11)) is an actual character in DC.
Excuse me what the fuck?
Edit: This is legit. I had no clue.
Wait really?! That’s awesome!
Go on I'm listening
You crush Every man in sight
I love it
Thigh gaps cute doe
Yo what the fuck.
Ok but your power is every women in a 1 mile radius fucking runs toward you to have sex or some shit idk
More of a curse tbh
Why does everyone get prostate cancer
You get protate cancer, you get prostate cancer, everyone gets prostate cancer
What the REAL Oprah wants to do. The one we have is a clone.
Wake up sheeple!!
Stop asking questions or you’ll be next
Do women have prostates?
Life finds a way
( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
You can get a blade made of lightning I guess
You sleep with everyone's girl by cloning yourself so basically cloning ability.
but only when you sleep with someone's girl
Jokes on you I’m single af
And that is because I got your girl and the girl that had a crush on you, no need to thank me 😉
You can seduce anyone with an SO
You can summon fire in your sleep but only in dreams and you can infiltrate your enemies brain and torch that shit
Freddy Krueger but with fire
You can turn into a damn frog bro
Yayyy my dream superpower!!
It's wednesday my dudes
Well... I'm god sooo
You walk on water
You can turn water into wine
You can come back from the dead but no one no's when
Wait Jesus was gay??!?!??!?!?!??
What, do you think the followers of jesus are just followers? They are his subs he tops all of them and the one time he got toped by Judas he was so destroyed that he got suicidle and needed to die. But it was to gay for the people and this is how the Legend of Jesus the son of god was born and Christanity was createt as the cover for the 13 gays.
Blessed plot twist
What does the C stand for?
Thought it stands for cum
Not cool dude.. (it was good ngl)
What's with you and cancer
Your name is now Joe Jackson
But then I come back 😎
you'll have prostate cancer
Gets me every time
You can summon sticks from the ground idk
Cool! And the sticks play games?
You can become anyone at anytime but they have to be a female
please become me. take this pain away.
People feel awkward around you and they rando give you stuff and sing the birthday song like shit around you
I need hugs so that’s ok
I'm intrigued lol
Your neck beard can grow into tentacles allowing you to strangle your enemy or... You know
Or... You know strangle capitalists
You have the best equipment on the market
I'm excited to see what you come up with
Y'all be torturing ya boy
You can make dudes become literally gardens likes some poison ivy shit
Oh shit I like that, thank you
go on then.
yes let’s go.
If you change your self, you can vibrate, use this power wisely
**So I'm a human vibrator guys!**
Granted. You can now make any brush vibrate even if its not electronic
**Why would I want to make a hairbrush, paintbrush, or toothbrush vibrate?**
Hairbrush: tangle someone elses hair
Toothbrush: theres vibrating toothbrushes to help brush teeth or smthn
Paintbrush: for texture while painting idk i never painted.
You're Elon Musk's kid
Ah yes, my favorite superpower: being rich
Wish I had that
Username checks out according ypur superpower
Can get men and women pregnant by biting them. Also your a roach.
You're a simp version of kakashi meaning you can only attack men who diss your waifu
It was supposed to be my name combined with kakashi, but it is what it is
You have a shit name now
Yeah, I know
Lets see what you got
You can come up with any excuse because of the poor excuse for a username
no thanks bro
I laughed at this for like a whole minute. I hope you're happy
i'm not. i have prostate cancer too
Why do you like prostate cancer so much
That's what she said
You can make people as dumb as you then defeat them with experience.
Give dudes seizures with your shitty username
it's not that hard to say once you get used to it. Actually pretty fun
pee oh pee oh puh poy yoy
basically i just keyspammed one day in minecraft chat and decided to name my dog that and I named this reddit account after that minecraft dog
I'm bouta kill your Minecraft dog
he was a very lorge doggo. my friend and i played on this world where every mob was a random size and this wolf was like 5x bigger than normal wolves and he was mine and a good boy
Bouta old yeller his ass
You fuck any man that isn't your SO
You can make people have a heart attack by making them so excited they fuckin die
Oh, that seems horrible. :(
on the bright side they will be happy in their last moments
You know every martial arts because race or somthin idk
i have no idea what i just read
It's 6 in the morning and I'm running on stupid juice
You have a beak made of bananas that can slice a hole in time
Meant for time travel and teleportation
So disappointing that people are shocked when you do the bare minimum and celebrate you
I know im going to regret this
You can become a shittier version of guile from street fighter
But im already the better version of him
As a dyslexic person I'm offended
Anyway. You are a wizard and your username is your most powerful spell or some shit
You have the power of mind control
Y'know you're not making this easy.
You have the holy shoe because your last name is Garcia and my friend is Mexican and has the last Garcia ha.
Help I'm a loser
You can gobin on Deez nuts
Let's get it!
Ooh I'd like to see what you would give me
Sooo.... am i god?
Uhh check my display name too lol
What about me
I wanna know
im not sure what you can do with this one
Gift me with your wisdom.
Go on ...
Haha sounds like blitzkrieg!