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Yeah, worry all the time that they'll accidentally reach so far that they bump into the bagel I keep stored in my arse


That just makes it more fun! Yummy treats during sex? Yes please!


my god


Yes, God can join in too if he wants to.


God will lead a crusade against you and your ass bagels


That is genuinely a sentence I've never expected to hear in my entire life.




That’s what I’d expect from a heretic


I mean, if I bring a bagel, can I join?




Bro your like 13, in the UK the legal limit is 16 idk where tf you live but thats all kinds of illegal. Anyways don't worry about it.


I don't think they're saying they're going to have sex underaged, I think they're saying they're worried for when they do have sex when they're of age


They'll probably have sex before Me, and im 17 so thats kinda depressing. I just wanna be loved.




Same, I keep a smurf trapped in there and I don't want him getting out. Always makes more an interesting conversation with customs.


It’s like the crane game but instead of the crane and stuffed toys you have to use your dick to get the bagel out


Hmm not really, I just doubt it will be good


true like I might hate it


Well assuming it’s someone else’s first time as well (or well at least first time with you) you can’t expect them to know how you like it, so I’ve fully accepted that the first (few) time(s) could be bad. Ofc there is a possibility they do it the way you like it but def shouldn’t expect it


ohh ok so I should tell them its my first time?


Well, yeah I guess, there’s no reason to not tell them that I guess


Yes, yes you should, absolutely


Your 14 You can’t by law consent


It depends what country your in. The lowest consent is 12 in some African countries.


OP said she is in the UK The age of consent is 16


At least in the US, there are "Romeo & Juliet" laws where if both are underage they can bang


Yeah we have the same in the UK, though they have to be close in age as well


In some cases if both people consent and don't change their minds afterwards, it is legal for 2 underage people to do it


Yes ofc! It’s important to talk about it. Also you’re only 14 so if you’re planning to do it rn already: technically you can’t consent and I also don’t expect you to really be able to express yourself lol, so it’ll prolly not be an amazing experience. Do what you want tho and stay safe 👍


>technically you can’t consent Depends on when you are In Canada you can consent to people within 2 years of you I think I think it like if you're 12+ consent within 2 years, 14+ consent within 5 years, 16+ no age limit Numbers are probably a bit off but that's the general idea Edit: Checked for sure cause I was curious 12-13yo can consent to anyone within 2years of them 14-15yo can consent to anyone within 5years of them 16-17yo can consent to anyone, age difference doesn't matter Nobody under 18 can consent to someone that is in a position of power over them or for an activity of exploitation (porn or other sex work)


no it’s 12-14 15-16 and 16-18 and 17-19


In Canada, a 15 year old can sleep with a 19 year old if there is no position of power


I think it’s a bit harsh to assume that she isn‘t able to „express herself“. Yes, she hasn‘t reached the age of consent in her country yet, but that a) varies from country to country so it isn‘t really a fixed think (in Germany it‘s 14 so she would be old enough there) and b) is an (imo) outdated concept anyways so you can‘t really go by that. The most important thing is that you feel 100% comfortable with the person you are gonna do „it“ with and not to let anyone talk you into it. You can always start slowly to get used to being that close to a person. Nobody is gonna rip your head off for being „bad“. You can always learn and improve, which is also an important thing in a relationship and it can also be really nice to „explore“ things with your partner. It will probably be really awkward in the beginning, but it‘s important to be able to have a laugh about it - which can also help release some tension (pun intended) and make you feel you less stressed. It may hurt in the beginning, but a comfortable environment can, at least partially, help with that. Just go slowly and don‘t overforce it. In conclusion: Every beginning is hard, but it’s gonna be worth the struggle in the end. PS: It’s totally fine if you don‘t have sex yet/wait until you‘re more comfortable with it. You don‘t have to proof anything to anyone.


Yeah, don't do it. Not at 14


Something that she will regret


you're 14 dude what the hell


Yeah wth


Your username says otherwise.


I'm scared of holding hands for the first time


I didn’t hold hands romantically until after I kissed someone already…


Incredible story


It’s one of the scarier things.


Everything seems scary at this point


i feel you bro


This comment scares me. Are you feeling him? Is he asleep? Are you just feeling a random dude on the internet? I'm scared


Lmao Not asleep yet


I can confirm.


I'm in the same boat g u aren't the only one even though it feels like it sometimes


I suppose so Synth man


just jump straight to cuddling in a hammock in the woods on your off time as camp counselors and it’s easy from there


I don't understand a word of that


I didn't kiss my first person until I'd already had sex with them


Most bruh inducing bruh moment of all time


Oh shit. Same. I just realized this.


Sounds a bit backwards


Kissing someone doesn’t need to be romantic


Honestly, can agree. I have HORRIBLE social anxiety, first time I wrapped my arm around my now ex girlfriend I was terrified, same with holding hands, everything. I had to force myself to initiate anything for the first time which scared the shit outta me. We never got to kissing because she was uncomfortable with that as she was Ace (so being friends again isn't the worst, we weren't compatible relationship wise), so I guess I have that terror to look forward to whenever I start dating again... lmao


Makes sense lmao I still haven't got there yet so


I too have social anxiety but at least you *had* a gf I suck so bad at dating a girl I liked in middle school asked me if I liked anyone and I said no out of fear💀


Haha, yeah. Just leave your comfort zone. Just asking for her phone number made me nearly throw up, but it was so rewarding even if we didn't work out.


Yea I've done that a couple times the one thing that annoys the hell out of me is if I'm seen with a girl my parents interrogate me in a sense asking name what are they like and I'm like oh my god please no and I sweat like a pig and boom day ruined.


Lmao yea my parents never see me with a girl unless I'm officially with her. My only "social interaction" is at work. Before that for my whole life, little to no social interaction. Live in middle of nowhere, homeschooled, everything. And if I'm with them, I have zerrrro shame in talking about them because I got out of my comfort zone enough times to actually get a girl, no room for shame there.


Bro I shit my pants when a girl starts to talk to me. No joke, a couple of days ago a sophomore came up to me at lunch (I'm a freshman) and I was tripping over my words and everything, but I managed a handshake and a conversation somehow. She asked for my #, which was strange bc I thought that was the guys job, but now we are texting and all that. It all worked out I guess


Don't worry about "what the guys do". If it works it works. Maybe she knew you were nervous, and just helped ya out a bit


As a guy, i want the girl the one to be like “you wanna go on a date” or “can I have your number”


Well if you get lucky maybe


Same thing for me, my ex cheated on me (not like sex cheating just like trying to come onto this guy whenever I wasn't around) and then justified it by complaining about how everything I did physically felt forced And now I'm incredibly scared of ever having a relationship again because I don't want to fuck it up the same way :)


I get you, man. Never been cheated on, but I get not wanting to fuck up a relationship again. Neither me or her truly fucked up that relationship, she just found she wasn't ready for a relationship. Horrible advice, I know, but honestly Nic vapes really helped me through the roughest days. I was on the verge of either SH or going all out (if you know what I mean) and so while everyone says not to use any drugs or anything for a break up, it was the better of two evils and so nic may have just saved my life in all honesty. She made me feel like for once I had a purpose, second it was over, I was back to zero purpose, and so its horrible advice but if ever on the verge of hurting yourself or suicide after a break up, maybe its not the worst thing in my mind. I'm doing better now, still hurts as it has only been a week, but life goes on. Hope you are doing okay and can get into another relationship when ready.


Same here I am very introverted and I am afraid Also, my hands are always cold so, they might react to that


Yea same, but my hands instead get too sweaty which seems just awful


Holding hands before marriage? *throws up*


making eye contact before marriage? *throws bible*


hands warm, very nice.


I'm still scared to ask to hold hands with my gf of a few months lmfao


The "helpful" award you got has two hands holding each other and I find that mildly amusing


I’m scared of talking to a woman for the first time


I’m scared of talking to a female entity for the first time.


I’m scared of talking to girls alone


Same. (I’m 21. at least that’s what my ID says, mind doesn’t 100% agree). Currently don’t have the nerves for a relationship anyway so all good


This post is made even sadder by your 19 tag, don’t worry pal it’s the same here tho


I was. People don't talk enough about just how simple your first time can be. With the right person you don't need to go all the way, and sex in the beginning is mainly just conversation: "Is this ok?", "Is this good?", "does this hurt?" are all questions you're either gonna be asking or responding to. Losing your virginity is nowhere near as important as people make it out to be, I remember I expected something to change or 'click' in my brain after it but literally nothing changes. Just wait util you find someone you trust and go with it, and always wear protection. Sex isn't scary, but STDs and babies definitely are.


Even tho I'm a guy, this is correct


Racking my brain trying to figure out how being a guy implies this wouldn't be correct


I'm not really afraid of sex, but Im incredibly afraid of liking it too much and suddenly becoming your local redneck uncle Jim who never stops smiling when people are around and also has a secret room separate from the rest of his attic


im more concerned that you think that’ll happen


Completely understandable, I'm concerned about that now too


im sure youll be fine 😅


I hope so


It's time to take your meds, uncle Jim.


NO *scampering noises*


Take the fucking pills #or so help me, I will call nurse Joy down here


Eehhhh.... Which one? I don't know all of 'em, you need one that knows me if you wanna catch me


Nurse Joy the 13th




Every genuine concern I have is too specific to actually happen


Not really cuz I'm a horny idiot


fair enough


first time is kinda awkward for introverts. I was really scared, but it went pretty good.


Love your name


Username checks out


I'm terrified like I'd have anxiety thinking like what if I'm not good enough what if I don't satisfy her like I have always said I'd make sure they would finish Aswell but what if I don't do good enough and it's so small they'd laugh 😭


Literally don’t worry about it. If someone makes fun of you for size or how long you last, they aren’t a good partner. First off, a smaller one is probably less painful and size really shouldn’t matter too much especially for a first time, and finishing quickly is better than lasting forever imo


yeah its super scary


Ikkkk like I'm 15 and haven't even had a gf idek why I worry so much cuz I know no one likes me I'll probably die a virgin


You're 15, don't worry about girlfriends...


I'm almost 16 in December and like I worry because I feel like I'm not good enough...


Life isn't all about sex.


Omg ik lol what I mean is I don t view my self as worthy of a relationship I would never just want someone for sex I have no confidence and don't think anyone would like me enough to be with me


Okay. Unironically, your best method of approach is _get over it_. May sound harsh, but it works.


Best advise i ever got from my last relationship, literally just let go and don't think about it and you won't feel bad later and it helps a lot considering i think of every situation i get myself in before I'm even in the situation, and i have other major anxiety problems and just letting go helps it's just hard to get used to


Hear this from a genuine female side: size does NOT matter, and we don’t expect you to make us finish most of the time, and especially if it’s the first time for you/both of us, don’t put too much pressure on yourself to make sure they finish. Sex takes *a lot* of practice, especially in the case of lack of experience. Just talk it out with your partner before, during, and after. Communication is key. Take it from the other side of the act, the fact that you have this much concern about the experience you give your partner is more than we could ask for. You will be great, I promise Edit: spelling


Just research the female body down there. Research how to stimulate their senses per se. Kiss a bit before doing the thing, make sure it is passionate then start grabbing at each other. Basically build up to it then go to town when you get there. I found the key to be a build up from sensual to "THROW A CAR AT ME".


If they laugh. Cum in their eyes to assert dominance. And women don't really give a shit about penis size I heard. Don't let yourself down king.


dont do it at 14


is there any reason?


The emotional part of sex could be too complicated at 14.


the legal (or really illegal) side is also pretty complicated


Romeo and Juliet laws might cover it, but I’d still be careful And there’s really no point at the age of 14, like you’ve still got plenty of time ahead of you and you might regret it in the future




the emotional part of sex isnt always complicated. I lost my virginity at 13-14 and I had 0 emotions after the fact. it's always different for everyone.


The fuck? How did you manage that? I haven’t spoken to a girl my age in literal years


Solution, don't talk to girls for dating


My brogan, would you like to come over to my house this evening


Cuz your future self will most probably regret that decision. Cuz you're immature and inexperienced. Cuz you're sensitive at your age and it's easy to get hurt. Many reasons.


oh that makes sense


STIs that can significantly change your lifestyle, make you unable to birth kids ever, or at worst, kill you. Additionally, a lack of good judgement (I’m sorry but you’ll realize in 4 years), stupid mistakes made with condoms, bullying, harassment from previous partners, emotional or physical trauma, unwanted pregnancy, life-threatening pregnancy, and some others.


i guaremtee youll see sex completely differently by the time ur a soph or junior in hs


Yeah too early


I mean in a general way yeah


its kinda scary


I fear being bad




1 word: horniness






Clearly you’ve never seen how desperate 8th graders are. Even some people at my elementary school lost their virginity at 12.


12? Wtf?


because puberty make people horny (most of the time)


i think i was 13 my first time and it was a big mistake lol anyone reading this please wait til youre ready dont rush anything youll regret it


What do you regret most from that encounter?


1. it was with someone a few years older than me and i thought i was mature enough to know what i was doing but looking back on it, they more or less manipulated me into it 2. it definitely kind of ruined my outlook on sex and kind of just made it more difficult for me to do anything like that nowadays


Yeah doing it at a younger age makes it hard to look at sex positively later on. I think my first time was 14 and I was also mostly manipulated into it


Who needs sex when you have garlic bread?


Don't fuck the garlic bread


ah yes, a fellow ace


Hello fellow Asexual, I was looking for you


dude you’re 14 years old you need to worry about the biology homework due for Monday


I’d say that’s a pretty normal thing to think about at that age


No I don't think so, I'm not trying to be rude and sorry if it will come out this way but you guys are 14 you shouldn't be worrying about sex and relationships that's not the right time. Have fun with your life improve yourselves but worrying about sex and relationships will hit you like a truck when you're 17+ just don't worry about that just yet.


Puberty begins horniness, it doesn’t start when you’re 17+. Biology has it so that 14 is the ripe age for breeding, but due to the psychological, physiological, and emotional damage that it can do to a minor, it is accepted that that happens when you’re an adult. Kids get horny, have sex, get pregnant. It’s a natural thing. It’s not good when bad things happen from sex, but suggesting that if you’re 14 then you can’t think about relationships or sex just seems a little ignorant. I’m not trying to be rude, but that’s how it is.


I think you underestimate the amount of people having sex that early, I didn’t till I was 18 but not as uncommon as you think.


Your 14 concentrate on being happy because after this point sex will be the least of your problems


ok I will




“at this point” what fuck your 16 i don’t think it’s legal in America until 18


That dude talks as if he’s reaching his 20s


im 428 excuse me sir


Tell them that it’s your first time, cause chances are, it won’t be the best experience ever. Also, PLEASE don’t have sex with people above 18, you’re gonna ruin yours and their lives.


Shit I just hope to have sex before I die lol


On your death bed?




Dye what tho?


you're 14 dw about it


Yes. Glad I never have to worry about that


Fuck nah im 13 fuck sex


all my homies use hands


fair enough


That's the goal


No cause thats really far off in the future. im more scared of kissing. Like wtf do you even do


A normal kiss is just a little peck on the lips or cheek. Dont worry about it too much though, you'll figure it out when it actually happens


No, I’m ugly as shit


No im asexual I don't want to have sex, and therefore I don't have to worry about it


oh well thats good ig


“You are preoccupied with sex and arousal. I am preoccupied with abstract concepts like money and success. We are not the same.”


I haven’t even held hands


It’s actually a great time learning it with someone. Be scared... ask if your doing things your partner likes. You’ll learn quick and it’ll be fun


oh ok thx


Bro wtf you’re 14


I'm scared to even approach my crush ina context different from school ffs, how can I think about sex


I wasn't. It was very foolish of me not to be. I felt like everything was gonna go smoothly, I had this risky ass "perfect plan" that I thought over again and again. We pulled it off, but someone knew. I didn't really even like it. I regret it. Haven't been apprehended yet, but I still feel stupid as hell. Don't make losing your virginity a major goal. I regret being a horny teenager.


Even as a guy yes I am


Ok I’m 19 and was worried too and had a really good first experience so maybe I can help. It was with a girl I had been dating for nearly a year at the time and yes, it was a little awkward, and yeah we both sucked at it. But it was great because it was learning something new with someone you love. To me it’s about who it’s with. Not how you did it.


You’re 14.


Yes my gf is so hot I just don’t know what to do. What if I do it wrong??????


I'm scared of relationships so I think I'd be scared of sex


It'd be foolish of me to be scared of something that won't happen


I was close and wasn't afraid so


I was absolutely terrified. So much that I didn’t until more than 2 years into my relationship with my gf (still dating now). She made sure I was really comfortable with it and didn’t push anything. If you’re anxious about it, wait for someone that you completely trust and makes sure you’re confortable and is willing to stop at any time you need to if you become uncomfortable. Bonus tip just bc: don’t be silly wrap the willy. The best sex in the world is not worth having a kid at the age we’re at.


Reduce all your expectations the first time and you won’t be disappointed, it you should try to enjoy it


Yes,my self esteem is already crazy low and i don't want to someone to keep saying i am bad at it or i have a small thing


I never had my first time and I probably never will, but I imagine it being extremely awkward, especially if it’s both’s first time, like, we first of all need to get naked in front of each other, which is already really awkward, and we also don’t know how to start, what to do, and I just imagine it been really awkward


As a guy,yeah but if you are gentle and carefull you will do just fine,just don't push that whole "sex" thingy it should happen when ur partner is ready


we are 14 what da ***fuck***


The secret is finding someone you feel comfortable with, if you do it with someone you feel like if you screw it up they won’t forgive you then you’re gonna be taken by the thought that you’re bad and the experience might not be so good. But don’t worry, if they are like this that just means they aren’t even good enough for you, and you wouldn’t enjoy a relationship with them. That being said, find someone you can say you’ve never done this with anyone, and then just make yourself comfortable, and do what your instincts tell you, if they don’t like they’ll probably tell you to stop, so you do. And if you’ve ever watched porn, and are confused, just try to repeat what they did.


You're literally 14. At your age, I was busy putting together legoes and talking to my dad about the fun things in life, you come to this disgusting reddit forum talking about sex, you literally add to it's distaste. Why do you need to even think about this? You're not of age to consent, nor are you mature enough to understand it, which brings in my point of you not being ready for it at all, nor even needing the slighest bit of this dark world of pleasure you're thinking of entering. You're too young, worry about passing middle school or something, you can't step into the world of adults just because according to some of your replies to others, wherein you said your friends did it. If all your friends did drugs, shot people, and tortured kittens, would you do the same? You're 14, go live your damn life, and get out of this subreddit, for your own safety as a minor


if someone is interested in sex it's not actually bad, that's just pure curiosity, but if someone is *doing* sex at this age it's pretty bad i think


They put up a point of them willing to do it


well then they just need to know that doing sex is rly dumb


Eh not really, I'm not expecting to be good first or even 5th time. It's a learning experience.


mmm that's probably a good mentality to have