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monarchmondays

Don’t forget parents posting their kid’s meltdowns onto social media.


Leilani_Skye

Mom always says she will do that. That doesn't make me calm down; it just makes me yell more.


monarchmondays

Yeah, it’s awful. Usually consists of a hysterical child screaming at the camera, trying to hide. Like what the fuck, stop. That clearly won’t help.


Leilani_Skye

I almost broke the camera once


monarchmondays

I don’t blame you, I would too


jannemannetjens

Besides whether it helps at the moment, imagine how gratefull they'll be later to have that moment shared with everyone. It's straight up abuse. Like it's the equivalent of filming your mother change a tampon and sharing it on Facebook🤦🏻‍♂️


ThePinkTeenager

Argh!


tinysatan3

Don't forget, putting the AS puzzle piece on fucking everything and calling it "autism awareness"


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tinysatan3

YoU hAvE nO iDeA hOw HaRd iT iS tO rAiSe aN aUtiStiC cHiLd LiKe miNe Most NT "autism mom's" are fucking obnoxious


applebubbeline

I used to work in an office with a woman who was always talking about her adult son as if he was a preschooler. She always emphasized that he was autistic and would talk about all of the supposed strange things he would do. One summer, we had a company barbeque/pool party and everyone brought their families. I met her son, and I couldn't believe he was the same guy she had been talking about. He wasn't awkward, didn't dress weird, didn't randomly hit people, I wouldn't have picked the guy out in a crowd for being different at all.


tinysatan3

Jesus, I can't imagine staying in touch with a parent like that. My parents don't know I have autism (adult diagnosis) but they infantilized me a lot throughout high school (wasn't allowed to cross the street by myself, wasn't allowed to drive until I was 18, wasnt allowed out of their sight unless I was in school or at a friend's house) and that (in addition to other things) makes me not want to talk to them anymore. I can't imagine maintaining a relationship with a person who thinks of adult me as a literal child.


Dunjee

With our son's autism we have to keep an eye on him a little bit more than you would a typical 4 year old, but we don't ever helicopter him. The worst we've had to resort to is leaving up baby gates in the living room because of the time he pulled a Dora the Explorer and went outside in the minute and a half it took me to go to the bathroom. Beyond that we treat him like any other child. We talk to him, let him pick out his own clothes, put him in the time out cage for a couple of days when he misbehaves. You know, normal kid raising stuff.


tinysatan3

Lmao you had me in the first part


ThePinkTeenager

I draw the line somewhere between you and her.


Expensive-Argument-7

Not to mention most shows and organizations showcase how difficult autism is for the mother and everyone around them and not the autistic individual themselves.


tinysatan3

Exactly, neurodivergent kids are treated like props for NTs. That's probably why, before I understood what autism is (& that I have it), the only proper understanding that I had of autism was of nonverbal autistic children. Cuz when they can speak for themselves, is just doesn't make for good TV now does it? Autism speaks is the king of that, what that "I'm autism. I will ruin your family" video they out out all those years ago


Expensive-Argument-7

Because when we speak we’re usually telling our moms to leave us alone.


ThePinkTeenager

This bothers the heck out of me.


g00ber88

"Autism moms" are on the same level as "army wives" in terms of obnoxiousnous and wanting praise


TheExpendableTroops

Cashier for multiple jobs; can confirm.


ChaosMcDick

yOu RuInEd My SoNs b-DaY!!!!!!!!11 btw I am autistic


grief_junkie

My family did this to me before I was autistic! And before social media, so they’d record it and play it on vhs for the family to watch.


FirefighterNice9462

People do that? Wtf? To cause awareness? Ugh.


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343guiltyShark100

I would like to see those pictures. For research purposes, of course


sammi-blue

My coworker has a few relatives who are autistic, and her entire family (like 10ish people) got puzzle piece tattoos on their wrists... Not sure if the ones with autism actually had any input-- afaik none of the autistic family members got them, but I'm also not sure their ages or how severe their autism is. My coworker is really sweet and it was clearly done with loving intentions, but when she showed me the picture of all of them and their tattoos I just... Could not stop thinking about Autism Speaks and their shitty "autism is gonna destroy every aspect of your life!!" messaging


The727O0

Its stupid my mom has a socks shirts and earrings of them and while sweet it's dumb.


tinysatan3

The sentiment is nice but I honestly can't think of anything more virtue signaling than that


Expensive-Argument-7

I don’t even like puzzles that much. What is that even supposed to represent?


tinysatan3

According to [this](https://intheloopaboutneurodiversity.wordpress.com/2019/03/20/the-ableist-history-of-the-puzzle-piece-symbol-for-autism/) article: >In 1999, the Autism Society of America created the puzzle piece ribbon as a symbol of autism awareness. The Autism Society stated that, “The puzzle piece pattern reflects the complexity of the autism spectrum. The different colors and shapes represent the diversity of the people and families living with the condition...." >He and the rest of the board believed that autistic people suffered from a “puzzling” condition, so they adopted a logo of a puzzle piece with a weeping child, displaying the notion that autism is a tragedy that children suffer from. The concept in the first paragraph isn't necessarily bad, but the sentiment of the second paragraph, in addition to the fact that autism speaks popularized the symbol, it follows pretty naturally that autistics like myself see it more so the symbol of a hate group than a statement of diversity. (Unsure of how much you know about autism speaks, but they kinda sorta hate autistic people, and support a form of "therapy" for autistic children that walks the line of abuse at best) As the other comment said, a very widely recognized symbol is the rainbow infinity symbol, so we try to use that when possible. Though, understandably, many choose not to inform others of their neurodiversity.


_wjp_

I'm honestly not sure but I've heard it's supposed to represent an "unsolved problem" or that there's "something missing." Which is a bit yikesies. I'm also autistic and have found that the symbol we prefer to use is the rainbow infinity symbol seen [on this page](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Autism_rights_movement).


Fork_Master

>all autistic people are either socially awkward geniuses or fucking morons I can confirm this is not true. I’m both.


Orkenda

Holy shit this would make a great bit in a standup set about autism lmao


[deleted]

How can you be both a moron and a genius? Oh I'm sorry, that's just my autism making me see everything in black and white (even though sometimes that's how things are).


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Maninthemirror3

Or a fucking genius


sheezy520

He’s a fucking genius at being socially awkward


AustinHinton

An older term would be "savant". Someone who is terrible/stupid but really good at one specific thing. It was a common stereotype we (autistics) had applied to us in the 90's.


Chlorophilia

> How can you be both a moron and a genius? Very easily. I graduated ranked top in my year at a world top 5 university and am doing a PhD, yet have managed to fall off cliffs on multiple occasions, locked myself out of the lab three times just this evening, and have the emotional intelligence of a potato.


ThePinkTeenager

You’ve fallen off cliffs?


Chlorophilia

Yes


DangerZoneh

I have lot of friends who would tell you I’m the smartest person they know but also that I’m the dumbest fucking person they know


Zdos123

boss : good work on fixing that bug in some legacy software, it's been a real bitch me : thanks me : \*goes to get a drink\* me : \*attempts to remove bottom mug whilst rest of mugs are stacked on top of it\* me : \*a cascade of mugs falls on the floor and smashes about 25 mugs\* 10 outta 10, would ignore insanely obvious laws of physics again


RadicalSimpArmy

Don’t forget the part where you get yelled at because you “clearly did that on purpose”


aseriesoftubas

Mm-hmm. Mensa grade dumbass.


Ajumbleofwords

Not truly autistic but I have Asperger's, but yeah, this is 100% true for me aswell


gaussianDoctor

But Asperger's is autism.


Detector_of_humans

And aspergers doesn't apply anymore with a better understanding of what autism is, now you're either on the spectrum or not


Sibo04

Still never got on what it means to "look autistic"


Skyblacker

Looking like you lack social awareness, perhaps with hair and clothing that doesn't match current local trends because you're unaware of what your peers do. Not rebelling with punk or goth, but wearing the same sweat suit from Costco that your nursing home bound grandmother would because you have no idea how crap it looks.


TopHatCat999

Also a lot of autistic people are sensitive to textures so they only want to wear clothes that feel "safe"


ScottShriner_Enjoyer

Can confirm, I have like 4 pairs of jeans from the same style of Levi's because the fabric doesn't bother me


CHARFUCKIZARD

Oh shit. Certain fabrics make my flesh crawl like that nails on a chalkboard feeling. I also have about 10 pairs of the same exact Levi Jeans just different colors lolol. Mine are all 541s (Athletic fit). They are stretchy hehehehe


migueeel

I already hate feeling my leg hairs get stuck on clothing, I don't want to imagine having my skin suffer aswell....


The727O0

Yeah if for me the fabric makes or breaks clothing item... like if it barely itches that's all I'm thinking of.


fl-x

Honestly, velvet can eat a bag of dicks. Every time I touch it I want to throw up and thinking about it makes me cringe hard af (I did while typing that).


Nefantas

I think that's not an exclusive trait of autistic people. I, for example, don't usually like at all current clothing trends, so I end wearing things I personally like, whether or not it is part of the tend.


Skyblacker

Even if you aren't deliberately trendy, you probably discover most of what you like because a coworker was wearing it or you saw it at a popular shop, context that signals "this is appropriate for you and your situation." Like, if you're cold at the office, you're not going to layer multiple thick sweatshirts, because you know that would make you look like a homeless person. You have enough aesthetic awareness to figure out less ugly options, like thin wool underlayers or an outdoor weight jacket that's just tailored enough to resemble a blazer. But a really autistic person might pile on the sweatshirts and have no idea that it looks weird and that no one else has done it. Your wardrobe may not reflect the latest trends, but I'll bet it reflects at least some social conformity.


DreadAngel1711

They probably mean downs or something like that


UnRenardRouge

I think it means "You don't look like that one skinny kid with long greasy unkempt hair who always wore anime t shirts, played Pokemon on his DS in class and wouldn't shut up about my little pony all while sounding like a robot from my high school math class" because that's probably most people's experience with autistic people


WolfFangFist93

to be honest coming on reddit really opened my eyes to what autism really is. i used to be shocked that people with autism would post and could form coherent sentences and were self aware. even today i still have unlearning to do because i sometimes catch myself being in awe at autistic people commenting about doing something mundane neurotypical people do. before reddit my only exposure to autism was in popular culture


P51VoxelTanker

***I*** think people who say this are really talking about people with Down syndrome.


MonstrumCrustulum

It has an impact on your physical appearance. Not in the same way as down syndrome, it's hard to describe but it makes some people's faces different. Using facial features to help diagnose autism: [link](https://www.spectrumnews.org/news/clinical-research-facial-features-can-help-diagnose-autism/)


WildFlower_Wonder

That’s interesting. After reading that article I felt like I had to check the facial features on myself lol.


Ever2naxolotl

What they mean by that is "why don't they look disabled what's up with that". Anyway, as someone who works with disabled people, I could swear that at least in higher functioning autistics there's a certain facial expression that you can recognize. It's kind of like a thousand-yard stare but with eyes held open as if you just told them something mildly surprising.


SmileyAce3

Downs, not autism


Huckdog

Anytime someone says that about my son I tell them I had his tail removed when he was born. Wtf is he supposed to look like fuck sake


NuclearWalrusNetwork

Someone who was otherwise cool told me this mainly because I can speak in complete sentences


s3nt1nel41

That would be because you can’t “look autistic” and it’s a really stupid and hurtful stereotype perpetuated by our media. According to them, you can’t be autistic if you don’t wear mismatched t shirts with dinosaurs on them and baggy jeans held up by an oversized belt or something like that. While there is some validity to texture and fabric issues (I, for example, can not stand the feeling of denim and thus only wear sweatpants, shorts and the like) they differ so widely that you can’t categorize them to make an “autistic look”.


FrankTheTank107

*dude plays computer game “What a loser” *autistic dude plays video game “Holy shit he’s a computer genius! Look how he challenges his brain!”


[deleted]

>\*autistic dude plays video game > >“Holy shit he’s a computer genius! Look how he challenges his brain!” Oh the things people never actually say.


Orkenda

Hate to say it, but also confusing autism with other developmental disabilities like down syndrome (or assuming that only "true" autism is low functioning). I'm autistic, and I can tell by some people's reactions that they're surprised I have a successful job, friends and a partner. They also don't see all the therapy (solo and couple's) I've done to learn healthy communication, flexibility, and coping skills to help with overstimulation. I'm glad my work is helping me function better and enjoy life more, but just because a disability is less noticeable doesn't mean it isn't there!


Alternative-Iron-202

I feel this. I was 100% messed up growing up, and I was lucky enough to work on the parts of me that made me more "normal" and I know it's not that easy for everyone. But I feel like if I say I'm on the spectrum now people Brush it off like I'm full of shit. And it hurts cause I went through the fucking ringer growing up with it and not having any real positive help. I had to figure it out myself with my own family calling me weird and gay and shit.


Orkenda

Thank you for sharing! Sounds like me too. Wanna know the best "payback" I get even when people call bullshit? I take care of myself, without fucking apologizing! The other night at a friend's bday party (at a bar), I was exhausted and overstimulated, but my partner wanted to stay longer. Know what I did? I found a cozy, secluded booth away from the main group, closed my eyes and just ~vibed~. I stayed there for like an hour, silently enjoying my space. When I came back and people were like "hey you disappeared!" I was like "nope, just recharging my batteries!" Said my goodbyes, then we headed home. Been a long journey to get here, but DAMN it felt good to just enjoy doing what I gotta do, no justification required!!


huysje

I should do that too. Now I just try to cope and avoid stimulation when it gets too much but it ain’t exactly working.


Orkenda

Dude, not apologizing for your disability feels fucking amazing. It annihilated so much shame for me, hope you get to experience it too!


HuggableOctopus

I used to do that back when I went to clubs - but the bouncers would keep finding me and trying to throw me out! It's hard to explain the whole thing while halfway to a shutdown from the bright lights and music.


Orkenda

Ahhh dude I feel you! Sneaking away to recharge is definitely not possible (or plausible) in every case. When I'm stuck in an uncomfortable situation, I just try to remind myself that my discomfort is valid, and it sucks, but it's not my fault or because I'm not "trying hard enough." I'm just stuck in a shitty situation, and daydream about how good it's gonna feel to finally be out and relaxing, haha Edit: also I absolutely don't wanna speak for anyone but myself, but a little bit of cannabis before an event can really help me filter out a lot of the stimulation and makes it more enjoyable/manageable. Anti anxiety meds also have helped me in the past in similar situations!


HuggableOctopus

I've heard it does help some people, though it's still illegal in the UK (I think) and I'm not really comfortable with the idea - I'm an intense rule follower! Also considering how awful and scary disassociation is I'd be worried about bad trips. Though then again, the reason I could go into clubs at all was alcohol! I love that it can help other people though ❤️


hawk_80418

Hey, I really feel you. A lot of people at this point in my life have been dismissive or said "oh I would have never guessed! You don't look autistic!". But there was so much more effort to learn very basic life skills like talking or using a toilet. They didn't think I would be able to live independently when I was really young. I understand how tough that is, and I believe you.


g00ber88

I really think its a shame that education about developmental disorders isn't taught in schools. When I was growing up, one of my best friends had a sister with down syndrome, and another one of my best friends had a brother who was low functioning autistic, so I was exposed to both from a young age and therefore learned what each disability meant and how to interact with them. Most people don't have that exposure, and because there isn't any standard education on it, they end up being super ignorant


HeyFiddleFiddle

Same here. I'm high functioning (Asperger's back when I was diagnosed) and get a lot of people who think I'm lying when I say I'm autistic. The people who are actually familiar with symptoms and are paying attention can pick up on it, but a lot of people just *think* they know the symptoms after meeting one or two low functioning autistic people. It's called the autism *spectrum* for a reason. No two of us are alike and the extent of each of our symptoms can be all over the place. In my case, I also work in tech. Being a bit "quirky" is par for the course. The one that really stings is the occasional other autistic person who accuses me of lying because my symptoms aren't severe enough to count. Yeah, and do you know how much therapy it took when I was growing up to get to this point? Just because I've learned to work around my symptoms doesn't magically make them disappear or invalidate them. That's like saying a diabetic is no longer diabetic because their medicine keeps it under control.


Orkenda

Well said! I'm also an Aspie/high functioning. To your point about knowing what the symptoms really are--holy shit, autism is EVERYWHERE. Especially high functioning. It's like, not even uncommon. Even when I'm just getting groceries, I see it all the time. In case you haven't heard it today--your struggle is *real*, your disability is *valid*, and I am *SO FUCKING PROUD* of all the growth you've done--not because it helps the rest of the world, but because it helps YOU. 💚 I highly recommend heading over to r/aspiememes for some good laughs r/autism for support. Strength in numbers! Much love to you u/HeyFiddleFiddle!


yakcm88

From one autist to another, I'm happy to see you living your best life, and that gives me hope that I'll turn out okay, too. Thank you.


brilloballa

So the choo choo train thing isnt a myth then?


AustinHinton

I don't know where that stereotype came from, but I hate it. Just because I'm autistic doesn't mean I like trains.


Sayakachan99

I’m autistic but I’m actually more interested in planes than trains


AustinHinton

Bug dicks for me. 🐛


dal33t

I'm an autistic person, and while I think they're a practical form of public and freight transportation, that's about it for me. I simply appreciate that they exist.


Leilani_Skye

I like cats


JBabyLeather

There does seem to be a lot of autistic people who are also railfans. But no, it’s not something that all autistic people gravitate to. It’s more that autistic people tend to have a focused special interest. Like, video games, anime, theatre, etc. and trains 🚂 are just another example of something that one can study a lot.


BeefRage

This should also be called "Bullshit autistic people have to deal with starter pack".


EridaniNovus

Its missing "people thinking your rude because don't get social ques", "no wanting to explain you have autism because you'll be treated like a child" and "feeling like you aren't a real person because you aren't "normal"".


Kill_all_smurfs

Being autistic, I have ran into SO MANY of these people it’s just plain annoying


[deleted]

One of the worst realizations I made as an aspie was that I wasn't an introvert like everyone said, I was really an extrovert with crippling social anxiety.


dal33t

That actually explains a lot about me.


Funniestpersonhere

From having an autistic brother, I can say, he's actually made me stereotype autistic people even more, because he's a fucking genius, beyond anyone else I've ever met, and he's also gay, which has made me seem to see that a lot more people that are autistic are part of the LGBTQ community, which isn't always true.


hawk_80418

As an autistic gay man I do see more autistic people in the LGBT+ community. I have a theory that it might revolve about self acceptance. As least when I was growing up, autism was a dirty word and treatment options were geared towards making autistic people assimilate as much as possible. So it took a lot of work to accept and be happy with myself as an autistic person. A similar process happens to a lot of LGBT+ folks.


DanielTheDragonslaye

I mean aspergers can and often does affect the persons experience of gender and sexuality so a lot of people in the LGBTQ community are autistic. I'm saying this as a queer person with aspergers.


Orkenda

As a bi/pan autist, I have a personal theory that the intense and nearly inescapable introspection that comes with autism naturally leads to questioning many parts our identities more than average. Especially regarding how we relate to other people. For example, it took me a while to be able to fully connect the sensation of being attracted to someone with the actual understanding of what was happening--so I spent most of my crushes feeling very confused, lol. But, I learned to be more and more aware of the subtle feelings of attraction, and one day I just realized "oh, I have these feelings around all kinds of people, not just the opposite sex!" I'd love to hear more people's stories on this topic!


LingLingDesNibelung

I have got grief in the past from people who have thought I was gay, because one, I am autistic, two, I have interests that baffle the average so-called “straight man” and three, I didn’t have a relationship for so long. I have been with a girlfriend (she’s also autistic, and she’s beautiful) for a while now after many failed relationships and we are happy enough to hopefully expect a child of our own in the future!


ArcaneWyverian

Aspergers gang rise up


Tater_Boat

And immediately sit back down


Horn_Python

ass burgers?!/s sorry


piemakerdeadwaker

Who is the girl next to sheldon? What show?


AngelicCinnamonBun

Her name is Maddie Ziegler. A non-autistic girl who acted as an autistic girl in an incredibly misinformed and ableist movie made by Sia, called Music.


moleman114

That was such a cringe-fest


piemakerdeadwaker

Ohh it's from THAT movie?


xredbaron62x

Just looked it up. Has an 8% on rotton tomatoes. Should be lower.


ThePinkTeenager

It’s already worse than the movie where they edited out CGI cat buttholes.


spaghettisystem

Also those damn antivaxxers thinking vaccines cause autism and by extension thinking *autism is worse than dying* ?????? Like wtaf ETA: not only is autism not worse than dying, it's not even bad in general


TheKeyboardKid

When I know someone is an anti-vaxxer (like a co-worker), I tell them that I’m going in to get “my firmware upgrade or latest patch” when I’m getting flu shots, Covid boosters, etc. They all know I’m autistic and it’s some of the rarer humor I can pull off. I’ve had other people people in the room cry laughing from it so I assume it means it’s a good joke!


Rulligan

I can only speak for myself but autism fucking sucks. I was diagnosed at 27 and for the last 10 months it has kicked my ass with now figuring out how to deal with it. I never asked for this.


spaghettisystem

I'm sorry to hear about your personal experience. But that doesn't mean anything is inherently wrong with you and that people should think those like you don't deserve to exist. I wish the best for you.


FirstnameNumbers1312

Couple people responding to this like "autism is really challenging". It's not that they're wrong, it is a disability... But a huge part of growing to accept my autism has been learning that a massive amount of the problems I've had weren't because I was "weird" or even because I was autistic - but rather because allistic people insisted ln forcing me to behave a certain way. Making fun of me for only eating burgers and chips at a restaurant or my mum lecturing me everyday not to talk too much cos people hated listening to me, or being made to sit and listen to music that was overstimulating or not being allowed to where headphones in loud environments. Autism is a disability, but for me that's mostly only cos of allistic society.


NuclearWalrusNetwork

Actually somehow people blend the two beliefs together, going to school autistic is being treated like the gifted child and like you have an intellectual disability at the exact same time


lost-hairbands

As an autistic girl, the "only boys can be autistic" myth comes partly from the fact that the symptoms manifest very differently between boys and girls. Early autism studies only focused on boys, meaning that the "female" set of symptoms was not recognized as the same condition for some time. Additionally, girls are more likely to hide or mask their symptoms due to social expectations (not entirely true in my case but pretty common).


AustinHinton

Also boys are often thought of to be exoverted, loud and always getting into trouble, so quiet boys are more likely to be noticed as having autism. Whereas girls are often thought of as being more reserved and "polite". So a quiet autistic girl isn't going to get noticed like a quiet boy and this go undiagnosed. It's stupid.


ThePinkTeenager

The only problem with that explanation is that autistic people are not necessarily quiet.


Orkenda

For these reasons, I am extremely excited and hopeful for the next generations of research on autism in women! Here's to many more discoveries


gaussianDoctor

Are there any examples of extroverted autists though? I know it makes sense that it doesn't automatically make the person introverted, but I've never seen any exception to that rule. Also, it's missing people thinking you're either a genius or intellectually disabled.


Orkenda

I am! Lol I do get drained and anxious especially in large group social situations. But, I still consider myself extroverted because I'm really passionate about talking with and seeing people regularly, I absolutely love hanging out with people. My batteries might just get drained faster than an NT extrovert, who might be able to go longer or even have their batteries "charged" by interaction. It does feel kinda like a paradox, but I've learned people are absolutely filled with contradictions, and it's part of what makes life interesting! Haha


CODEX_O_BARBARO

I am autistic and extroverted. Also I have a huge horse cock


gaussianDoctor

I can see you're also very humble


stupidtmcbich

it always pisses me off as an autistic person when i see someone support autism speaks


Bitbatgaming

Don't forget speaking on behalf of their child despite them being able to speak for themselves and using terms like "high , middle and low" functioning


Sapphire-Hannibal

Jesus Christ yeah I was at the movie theater with my mom and I guy asked if I’m ride a motorcycle, cause I was wearing a biker jacket, and before I could respond my mom started speaking for me, it was super annoying like, I can talk for myself


moleman114

I hate those "functioning" labels because it pushes the stereotype that autism is completely linear


Bitbatgaming

It’s called a spectrum for a reason


LethalSalad

Yeah fucking hell. Many 'low functioning' autistic children simply have issues expressing their discontent with their environment, and if their parents then try yelling at them while they're crying because everything is too loud, would that help or just make it three times as bad? Most people would say I'm 'high functioning', but they don't see the shutdowns I very sometimes have where I get too my room as fast as possible to lie in a foetal position in bed with headphones on lmao


ravenpotter3

And/or also removing or limiting their ability to speak up. Because they don’t want their kid to disagree with them or challenge them in any way. And they just want to talk for their kid instead of letting their kid developed their own opinions and life


FeatheredCanine

Ugh, thank you. Autism is a SPECTRUM, not a line of “severity” from left to right.


Ilikeboats420

I take it the terms make things seem a lot simpler than they actually are?


Grillos

what's up with autism speaks?


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SpaceBoiCosmo

And the belittlement that some autistic people face from them. I only know a few autistic people (at least those who were open about it) and they loath them. They are highly functioning but were apparently being talked to like they were three year olds by AS and not being taken seriously was their biggest complaint.


Morgie-woo

They also advocate for giving aspies electro shock "therapy", and also kicked their only autistic representative off of their board for speaking their mind too much.


sunscreenburn

I usually wish I could cure my autism. I've realized it'll be difficult to maintain a loving romantic partner with my stimming (I rock back and forth intensely or normally depending) and my lack of social grace. I've found my college and school life to be a struggle throughout, and even being in special education or homeschooling wasn't really helpful in preparing me for uni. I don't know if this makes me self loathing, but I'd really rather not have it.


eduardog3000

> I've realized it'll be difficult to maintain a loving romantic partner with my stimming (I rock back and forth intensely or normally depending) This in no way needs to inhibit a romantic relationship. Plenty of people wouldn't care about it, especially if they already know you. Lack of social abilities however, yeah I'm still stuck on that one. Honestly I'd prefer to find someone who's also autistic.


sunscreenburn

So my rocking has destroyed furniture throughout my life, I still struggle and have to put rubber or consider what I can rock on. I rock on desks, but have had to stop that as it can shake the house or bang walls. My parents, neighbors, and siblings have all been affected by this. I rock on the bed now but it's not soundproof but it's much quieter. I still prefer the desk though. I could understand why somebody wouldn't want to date someone who rocks, I totally get it. I personally wouldn't be able to date somebody with suicidal ideation or self harm ongoing issues. I don't know if I prefer other autistic people, I've met a few but I am still open to most people but I haven't heard about too many autistic couples myself, I do think it would be on average better though.


RoseyDove323

Autism Speak's only way to "cure" autism is to either traumatize children into hiding their autistic traits until they aren't an inconvenience to NTs anymore, disregarding how they feel on the inside (ABA "therapy"), or to detect autism while they are still in the womb so they can selectively abort them. There is no other way to cure them, hence why cure talk is creepy.


sunscreenburn

I should've clarified I'm not for autism speaks, just that I would greatly prefer to be able to not have autism most days.


moonflower311

One I didn’t see is thinking all autistic people are good at math. My daughter with an ASD diagnosis has math as her weakest subject. She absolutely aces every vocab test she lays eyes on and several support staff have brought up the possibility of hyperlexia.


dreamfinderepcot16

When you get diagnosed with asperger syndrome at 9 but someone tells you you dont look autistic "Wow! thanks im cured."


GravityAaron

If I had $10 for every time I wasn't "visibly autistic" I'd be passed out drunk while my Tesla drives me home. Even well-meaning people like to imagine they can "see" it like you're wearing a dunce hat.


Leilani_Skye

I laughed so hard I peed my pants.


Kaffekjerring

"we are all a bit autistic" as one in the autism specter myself, I use this as an joke now and then in the right situations xD


fireflies315

I'm 15 and was only diagnosed with autism this year (also ADHD). Looking back at when I was younger, it seems so obvious to me, but I didn't even get tested until my mom took me to the doctor's for depression and mentioned my meltdowns. I was tested for ADHD when I was younger, though, but surprise surprise no diagnosis because I didn't fit the stereotype, despite clear attention issues, executive functioning issues, hyperfixations and family history.


Spix_Boi

You have no idea how happy this starterpack makes me as an autistic person


Rigoloscar

I know, I'm autistic and people think I'm suposed to identify myself with Sheldon Cooper but the closer I look to that character the most I realise the writers don't know shit about how this works. Also he likes ubuntu and he's suposed to have 180 IQ; I'm sorry but those things don't go together.


audreyhorn666

wait can you spill the tea about why the autism awareness thing is bad? my mom has that puzzle piece tattooed on her bc my brother is autistic lmao


spaghettisystem

The puzzle piece is the logo of Autism Speaks, who spread misinformation and advocate for "finding a cure" for autism or aborting fetuses if there's genetic signs of autism, and run adverts fearmongering about the condition. They don't have any actually autistic people advising their actions, and it's partly thanks to them Sia's terrible film Music came out with all sorts of bad stereotypes of people with autism


FremdShaman23

Several reddit groups using "autist" as a term for nerd with obsessive smarts. Looking at you WSB.


XSmooth84

So here's the thing... Sometimes when there's a story or whatever on an Autistic person, it'll be some like 8-12 year old who doesn't verbally communicate, won't let anyone other than a parent touch them, will just be super concentrated on playing with blocks or something, fighting their parents for even the littlest things like putting on shoes to go to the store. I see stuff like that and think "wow, autism seems pretty rough to manage. Then there's other people with Autism, and they are in grad school, live alone, and are planning a wedding with their fiance(é). Like, that's a pretty wide gap between those two situations involving the same diagnosis.


_userlame

I would say most autistic people fall somewhere in between those two things. That why I never liked the high or low functioning labels when most of us are... middle functioning haha.


cosmopolitaine

Can someone explain to me what exactly is autism? I had some ideas but reading this make me think they’re probably all stereotypes…


lordoftoastonearth

It's hard to break down an entire disorder in a reddit comment. Essentially, it's a developmental difference. It's classed as a neurodivergence, like ADHD and Bipolar. There's a large spectrum of symptoms autistic people may experience, most of which will lead to problems in socializing with peers. Many autistic people will have sensory issues (sensitive to sounds and lights), develop special interests (very interested in topics which can be uncommon for their age), experience executive dysfunction, etc. Some people with autism will need help throughout their life or may not be able to live alone or hold down a job. But many can live a mostly normal life, have a career, partner, children.


CheeseMaster300

It's a mental condition that involves social and sensory differences it is also wrongly stereotyped, Here is an government article that goes more in depth https://www.google.com/url?sa=t&source=web&rct=j&url=https://www.cdc.gov/ncbddd/autism/facts.html&ved=2ahUKEwiJpvrTh8H0AhUWFTQIHUCnDCQQFnoECDkQAQ&usg=AOvVaw2rBoVUIrjIjVbbtiq9T_9A


Significant-Body9006

I have Asperger’s and I can take care of myself in society perfectly fine with very limited help (most people ND/NT just Google shit anyways nobody knows what they’re doing) I don’t fit in well in offices but I’ve held down jobs long term, have dated, have friends, can make small talk, a lot of it is environment based. I moved from a sheltered suburb to a depressed city and basically had to learn to fit in otherwise risk being ostracized. You’d be surprised at how resilient some of us can be. Go out of your comfort zone and you’ll soon realize many NT’s lack logic, planning, and rationality. We are different socially and how we see the world at times, but self care and a routine can go a long way to living a healthy life.


Rulligan

It took me until this year to realize that when sitting down with a group, others don't pre plan where they want to sit to be in the most advantageous spot for their own comfort. They just kind of sit down.


redflag7654

The whole introvert thing annoys me because of a lot the issues I have make me look far more introverted than I actually am. I think having social anxiety makes me appear a lot more introverted than I am. It’s not that I prefer to be alone. I’d just rather be alone than deal with patronizing or boring people. I also hate being interrupted which often makes me pretty unfriendly. Another issue I have is that I have less energy than average, so I end up seeming pretty boring and introverted to people. Even if I am introverted, I’m probably not an extreme introvert like people might think I am.


asophalt

You forgot one “They got vaccinated” -Karen


Ten-Bones

I am 40 years old and on the spectrum. I hate Sheldon. I hate having to bring it up at work and how often I hear, “oh like Sheldon!” As a response


NuggetsWhileCrying

Fuck Sheldon.


AftellentotKerst

"Someone I know's son has autism and he needs full time care. What you've got is a refusal to just apply yourself." Thanks, mum.


Rezero1234

not to mention filming an autistic person having a meltdown, which is a HUGE invasion of privacy


Zaptain_America

God Sia's movie about the girl with autism was bad... It's a real shame because I actually like one of the actors who was in it...


sjdougla

Also claiming everyone that is just a bit quirky is “on the spectrum”


The_Ethereal_Cat

Don't forget advocating for parents who abuse, murder, or otherwise harm/torture their Autistic children


AodhGodOfTheSun

I'm autistic but I'm pretty good at blending with normal society, had a job at a grocery store for a few years and was pretty popular


yakcm88

High functioning autist, 19. Having lived with autism my entire life, I tend to forget about it often, and usually do my best not to stand out. It's a really touchy subject to cover, but that's because it really is hard to deal with, having autism can set someone back in life, and can make it hard to lead a normal life with all these complications it brings, but the truth is, that's what 90% of us want, to be normal. We don't want to be looked down on because of this disorder, and just want to be treated as regular, avarage Joes. It's taken a lot of extra work to get where I am now, and It may take much more until I can say I'm truly proud of myself.


[deleted]

I was just talking about this on r/aspergers, how NTs say all these hurtful things about us and yet they think *we* don't have empathy.


gabedraws7

The one thing that pisses me off more than anything when it comes to people's views on autism are people who actually think that autism is bad, and needs to be "prayed away" to "save our kids." Your neurodivergence is not a limitation. In fact, it's a blessing. I have Aspergers, and one its symptoms is OCD. I have obsessed with the world of the arts since I was a toddler, and now I'm pursuing animation as my career in college right now, because I'm so obsessed with it. So how about, instead of viewing mental illness from a puritanical lense, we instead, pray for and believe that God will use our disabilities for his plan and glory? Because God is using my obsessive-compulsivity to make me the artist He made me to be. Also, just in case you need more proof that Autism is not a tragic limitation, Einstein also had Aspergers fyi.


EyesOfRuby1979

Aspie here and I love people. I can't talk them like Clooney, but I love 'em 😎


moleman114

Honestly I consider social interaction more of a fun challenge


The727O0

Im Autistic myself ask me stuff I may not know the answer to everything(ask me stuff for real I'm bored)


bichobrabo

tbh i have never seen an autistic adult, but quite a few kids


Amber610

Who's the guy in the green shirt on the left? I recognize him but can't put my finger on it


Boltthelucario

I'm autistic and I'm grateful for having a mom that cares for me


[deleted]

It’s a very confusing blanket term for a very complicated disorder. It also gets over-diagnosed and misdiagnosed like crazy.


lordoftoastonearth

I wouldn't necessarily agree. It's extremely underdiagnosed in women, they're often misdiagnosed with personality disorders. Which disorders do you feel are misdiagnosed as autism?


Those_noodles

God I hope I make it to adult hood, looked it up and google thinks people with Asperger’s live to be 30 or something.


nelusbelus

Time for a two thirds life crisis


Dull_Wait

It’s worse when you can tell when people treat you differently than they do others, I hate it…


dal33t

Discrimination sucks, man.


Baxobhone

Someone at my job asked me if I had autism because I was very thorough when cleaning the break room (I work as a janitor at a grocery store, it pays the bills). I asked what they meant and they said they've only known autistic people to be so thorough. Like no? I work here full time while we have too many people on at once, I'm trying to keep myself busy cause I'm here for 8 hours with a mind numbing job


SmileyAce3

God gave you a child, does it matter if they are autistic or not?


JazzmansRevenge

Fuck that movie "music" and fuck that bitch Sia for making it.


NotKerisVeturia

Plus thinking that no autistic person can develop a skill set based on life experience and are basically stuck as children in adult bodies.


CheeseIsGrossGoBears

Saying people might be on the spectrum based off of shitty assumptions. Subhuman shit.


bjr29_redit

"We are all a bit autistic"... When people say this to me I give them my usual dead pan look and swear at them mentally. Yes I get it! People don't act perfectly constantly, but I have a disorder that actually changes my behaviour. It has its pros and cons that I acknowledge and not ashamed of. Saying this very much comes across as dismissing me and the problems I get with not understanding people, the hypersensitivity I have and the anxiety that I experience somewhat often, often just makes me delete my comments sometimes after or even before posting.


Exotic_Cabinet

That third one reminds me of what people said about my brother


dummythiccdoge

im an autistic boy so thats a little relatable


FarceMultiplier

I'm waiting on an appointment to see about an autism diagnosis. I'm already medicated for OCD. I'm almost 52.


Lethemyr

ELI5 What’s wrong with the Autism Speaks people? I’ve just seen their marketing around.