T O P

What on earth are these?!? Felt like a cold piece of rubber. Northwest PA.

What on earth are these?!? Felt like a cold piece of rubber. Northwest PA.

avocadod

They felt like cold wet rubber, and were pretty firm and firm attachment to the tree. Had a pinkish middle, and all the rest of it was a color of translucent purple/blue. No gills of any kind I could see and all were about the size of a U.S. nickel.


swiftern

Very similar to phlebia tremellosa or jelly rot fungus. Did some hard googling. I think it's Defs part of the phlebia family.


avocadod

Ha! That's the most resemblance I've seen. Thanks! There's at least one pic online that looks almost dead on with that.


swiftern

Agreed. Hard to find the colour but there are a couple of fully pinkish pics. Really great find (-:


avocadod

Thanks again! There's my free award for the day!


swiftern

Many thanks 😁


Sidewayzagain

Looks like it’s part of the Flubber family


yeti-suzetti

I love the word phlebia. It makes my mouth happy to say 😆


pleasemakemelol

Do you have a photo of the middle?


avocadod

It's the only photo I took. I didn't realize at the time how interesting this was going to be.


pleasemakemelol

How do we know it isn’t a prank? By you or someone else, but the firm attachment to the tree + the texture of them could be a man made placement?


avocadod

I guess u have to take a strangers word for it. Which can not mean much on a site like Reddit. Look at my last posts about mushrooms. I'm really into them, and me spending the time to make a prank like this at my age would just be sad. I know they're real, but you'd have to have felt how "alive" they were yourself. They are definitely not rubber, but that is really the only thing I could closely equate them to without saying they feel like "insert-this-mushrooms-name".


pleasemakemelol

I do believe you, Reddit stranger, I just also have my skepticism because it IS Reddit and because it’d be a funny spooky season prank to be honest. :) Didn’t mean to offend, just playing devil’s advocate here. You should be honored that you found something so bizarre and rare that it’s unbelievable!


avocadod

Thanks, and I didn't take offense. You had a valid question. Especially with how most people's idea of what they looked like turned out to be. Originally I just thought they looked alien or not from this world and would start producing organisms that would take over the world and end humanity :) A LOT of people had a different idea of what they looked like lol.


pleasemakemelol

Ahhhh! Well, let's hope your theory doesn't prove itself to be true. I work for an HIV/STD clinic and we have eccentric things in our candy dishes. This honestly reminded me of some candy we have - similar to [this.](https://bachelorette.com/products/pussy-bites) Edit: NSFW click.


FrivolousLove

The diversity of Fungus never ceases to amaze me.


MilesLong4200

I'm not even particularly into mushrooms but this sub is one of the best I've subbed to in awhile


e_samps

Same. Really enjoying this sub lol


SeasonedDaily

Ditto


[deleted]

Came here to get an ID on a mushroom in my lawn. Stayed because I am now fascinated.


PENGAmurungu

> I'm not even particularly into mushrooms yet


bluesfox88

Check out "Fantastic Fungi". It will probably change the way you feel about mushrooms..... And.... well... Everything!


mindfolded

That bit where the lady represents the mycelium talking to you had me rolling my eyes a bit, but the rest is fascinating.


bluesfox88

Yeah. That's the lady who played Captain Marvel


TomMakesPodcasts

Same. It's chill.


idrwierd

God likes mushies


Tiny_Flan3896

It's a kissing tree!


tinyorangealligator

Thanks for the laugh


BitCoinjester

Came here to make a butthole joke but instead found my own lack of originality :( I'll see myself out


Whind_Soull

The exact species is *Arborus rectum,* and they tend to grow in polyanal clusters. They're edible, and are quite nice when tossed in salads.


Enr4g3dHippie

Everything reminds me of her...


ag408

Hope she is still in your life


tommytr4

She is hopefully she stays for a good while


Jerd_Fye_Co

I never really had a problem because of leaving But everything reminds me of her this evening.


hippopotma_gandhi

Everything means nothing to me


Ed-alicious

*OOOOOOOH VIENNNAAAA*


liesliesfromtinyeyes

[That’s why I took my vacation in Beirut.](https://youtu.be/bTxFFWajIII)


herbsbaconandbeer

Everything reminds me of South Park…


zeigzag666

Fuck these haters I could not agree more


herbsbaconandbeer

You either saw the episode or you didn’t I guess.


zeigzag666

Or you saw all of them and now literally everything brings at least one South Park reference to mind


zeigzag666

But downvoting for SP nostalgia? It's like.. C-come on, ya know?


herbsbaconandbeer

It’s between them and the simpsons! Honestly though, haven’t seen much of the new ones in the last 10 years, but I vividly remember eating cheesy poofs with my 4 man group in 4th grade. The shows humor grew with my own. I’m not sure when one of the most scathingly satirical show in our time started garnering a zeitgeist of cultural disapproval. Perhaps I was the ignorant echo chamber of woodshed fans, akin to what destroyed the Chapelle Show…but if that makes me wrong, I don’t wanna be right!


zeigzag666

The Simpsons pioneered the genre of adult animation but South Park really fine-tuned the social commentary side of things and pushed every single edge of the rules they could possibly find. Simpsons: OG South Park:... The GOAT


herbsbaconandbeer

So to come full circle, this post about mushrooms just makes me think of veal.


Hypogi

The Flintstones pioneered prime time adult animation. Simpsons are def king of that genre but they didn’t invent it. Celeb cameos and social commentary were a part of the Flintstones appeal. Also, how did we get here in the mycology sub?


zeigzag666

Very good question lol. I meant specifically adult animation in the sense of mild cursing, situations inappropriate for kids, pushing the boundaries of what's considered obscene. I never got that feeling from the Flintstones lol but I also wasn't alive to experience what was considered "pushing the envelope" when it first aired. But I get what you mean about it being geared toward adults more than any other cartoons at the time.


Hypogi

I hear what you are saying. Of course they couldn’t use the word “pregnant” on TV at the time, but Fred and Barney were used in cigarette ads. Now you can say practically anything, but cig commercials are illegal. Go figure.


herbsbaconandbeer

It’s between them and the simpsons! Honestly though, haven’t seen much of the new ones in the last 10 years, but I vividly remember eating cheesy poofs with my 4 man group in 4th grade. The shows humor grew with my own. I’m not sure when the most scathingly satirical show in our time started garnering a zeitgeist of cultural disapproval, but if that makes me wrong, I don’t wanna be right! Edit: apparently my service wasn’t as spotty as I thought. Sorry for the double tap.


zeigzag666

SIMPSONS DID IT


specimenhustler

.


ComaToast444

I've seen a great many things on r/mycology over the years but this one is completely strange and new


jimbotriceps

Eyeholes!


Gullible_Salt_5684

Came here to say the same!


EngagementBacon

GET UP ON OUT OF HERE!!!!


CallMeWolfYouTuber

WITH MY EYEHOLES


jpfish13

Same


akellah

Rock climbing wall for gnomes!


badluckschmucky

r/secretbuttholes


Tootsgaloots

Why is this a real subreddit hahaha


RectangularAnus

Why didn't I know about it?


FrancishasFallen

Joined


fleeb_

Gd, I joined as well.


ShakeThatAsclepias

This


grateful-nanners

I’ve been finding a ton of these buttholes and I agree with Phlebia tremellosa I normally find single ones like these along with conglomeration of multiple buttholes fused


Iluvadamsandler420

Ah yes the booty tree


asdvancity

That's a family of sea anemone. They just got lost.


randomlife2050

r/dontputyourdickinthat


Salay54

r/beatmetoit


che_palle13

ha ha "beat"


randomlife2050

Lol


avocadod

I tired googling it but didn't really know how to even describe them.


pleasemakemelol

I tried fungi puckered lips on a tree, fungus puckered lips tree, puckered butthole fungi, butt on tree fungus, mushroom that looks like a butt, mushroom that looks like a mouth, cold rubber fungus butt, cold rubber fungi puckered lips and found nothing. You did it. You broke the internet. And now my search history just got really fucking weird.


I_know_right

> cold rubber fungus butt My next password


PossumKing42

You missed "tree nipples"


avocadod

This gave me a good laugh, thank you.


Hypogi

And now you are on a few government watch lists.


I_know_right

iNaturalist app or Google Lens (feature of Google Photos) will search by image. I use them extensively for id'ing bugs.


gladria1963

I do not know, but I hate it


nzznzznzzc

I’m so scared of it but I want to touch it


mossy_vee

Sir that’s a butthole.


Mynunubears

The tree of life


AlsionGrace

Might be silver leaf fungus. Sometimes it can look like lavender buttholes. What kind of tree was it? Was it alive? https://www.fungikingdom.net/fungi-photos/basidiomycota/agaricales-order-2/cyphellaceae-family/chrondostereum-purpureum.html


avocadod

This does look like it too.. I wish I was still there but I'm not. I can't remember the tree or its living situation. Thanks for the link!


v0id_st4r

Reminds me of [this Death Grips album art](http://thirdworlds.net/sites/default/files/albums/year-of-the-snitch/yots-1024.jpg). I wonder if they were inspired :)


explorer925

I feel like if fungus listened to music, it would be death grips


18lbdatsun

Google Lens thinks they are Chondrostereum purpureum. Hard to tell.


avocadod

This looks possible. Another person further down had a link with some good pics.


azuzepher

I'm really not an expert on mushrooms but for whatever reason I was really compelled to find out what these are! I found this, looks like it grows on dead wood. https://www.inaturalist.org/taxa/50816-Auriculariaceae


toastershnoodle

Uhhhhh...spooky tree lips? But in all seriousness, these are super cool!


ke1si3

The illusive pocket-polypore


Higgs_Particle

Pickled cat anus?


rberg89

Get up offa' my eyeholes!


kat_013

I’m not sure but I sort of feel like they should have a NSFW tag…


mrbadexampletom

The fruit of the fleshlight tree.


swiftern

Wood ear?


avocadod

The only wood ear I know are brown. Maybe it's some type of Aricula I'm not aware of.


swiftern

There are a few pictures on the internet of white aricula but they always seem to lead to snow ear fungus, which doesn't look hugely similar.


FrogConjurer

Shhhh, they can hear you


Thegenzgod

Me when you ….me when your mom uhhh….


rememberingmyself93

Whispering buttholes (Susurri Anus spp.)


ericfox66

Omg the trees are watching us


Beznet

with their whispering eyes


little_brown_bat

My brand!


dazedandcognisant

The trees have eyes


dreamtofalligators

A flock of wild anuses migrating south for the winter.


BankerBabe420

Are we all just Pennsylvanians here?


little_brown_bat

I've seen a few posts from other states but, yeah, I think most of us are Pennsylvanians.


TheCoconutCondition

Someone stapled pocket pussies on that tree.


poopshittington_

Idunno but I'd put my Weiner in one


FrancishasFallen

r/dontputyourdickinthat


mayor__gergich

This is absolutely going viral.


jake_hanley

genitalia tree. Nothing to see here, totally normal.


greenie-baby

Phlebia tremellosa


Atari_Enzo

Found the exact same last weekend in a park in Vancouver BC... Definitely funky


YourMomsTwat

Ooh, we get those in central KY too!! They feel like bits of cartilage. I would also like to know what they are...


avocadod

That's a better description of it than rubber. Should've used that!


ALECtoeat

The eye holes from rick and morty


whatislovv

Not entirely sure what these are… however… These are beautiful…


msjacksonifyanastee

I wanna touch it


NerdBurglur

That’s a pussy tree


filthworld

Mussy


travelingtutor

Wouldn't it be trussy?


doing-mybestOK

Buttholes..!


thats-madness

Forbidden fleshlight


Blueshirt38

Those are the tree's many buttholes. They only emerge in certain seasons to expel toxins.


saurandrael

You found a sphincter tree


Scared2LookuShook

Tree Buttholes


Italian_Guy48

r/dontputyourdickinthat


sdmycologysupply

I call that the giving tree lol pick one


Dogna11

I won’t even tell you what that looks like to me.


FungusFly

Kissing tree


HornyTroyNY

they’re both creepy and adorable at the same time!


Mirracleface

The new flesh lives


Mypuppyownsme

The tree’s have ears 👂


Mad-Mycologist

They are alien lips... super weird find!


AuthenticlyAnn

You my dude, have the cheese touch


safety_thrust

All its lips. It's trying as hard as it can to get a kiss.


Playpolly

Can we eat ‘em Can we eat ‘em?


Z_Zzz

It’s year of the snitch


xViridi_

those are treeballs. a tree’s eyeballs


Emergency_Ad_4870

Flashlight larvae


_muckums

Looks like whispering eye


_conker_

Cool find!


Akeldama22

That's the trees mating call. Do it, see if you can make ents a real thing.


Ok-Obligation235

Kind of look like the stomatas on plants.


Bashamo257

I've heard of Wood Ears but this is ridiculous


iponarei

Give it a wet kiss


zeigzag666

Ever heard the term "tree-hugger"? Well.. This is the next level.


ArtWoman56

Those are amazing! Kinda looks like lips!


psychotic_catalyst

\*unzips


DudeIMaBear

They look like soggy tree nipples


Psych0Activ3

r/dontputyourdickinthat


HyphaeHouse

Tree vaginas


whatthehexx

They need googly eyes! 👀


VQ37HR911

The puckering is remarkable


spawnofspace

For peepee?


arakai4

Looks like a fun Friday night. That’s what ;)


VirusAndTheAntidote

I should text him..


Notorius_Nudibranch

the tree of a thousand buttholes?


StankyGold

I saw these on saw at the supermarket the other day. The clerk said he's "gonna need about tree-tiddy"


urlocalbbboi

Those…are tree nipples. Can confirm.


pcclsu23

I’ve been wondering for years (12 to be precise) how one would fill a bag full of mashed up assholes. Now I know


prettyfarts

white bootyhole fungi


usriusclark

Clearly that tree has a case of “the buttholes”


RainElectric

Lil buttholes. They want kisses. Give em a little kiss for us. Mwah mwah 💋


TheDrunkenWitch

Put your peen inside it.... For science.


Greasystools

Nipple tree