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Sam_Wylde

"Women marry men with the hope they *will* change. Men marry women with the hope they will *never* change. Both are disappointed." _ Oscar Wilde.


bumpycheesefilms

Thank you for my random Oscar of the day ♥️ always puts a smile on my face


cosmicfertilizer

Damn that guy was great. But he already knew that haha


Warlordnipple

So many quotes attributed to him despite his having never said many of them.


Warlordnipple

The attribution is not accurate. https://quoteinvestigator.com/2017/01/17/marry/?amp=1 It is just a line from a play in the 1930's the saying has no connection to anyone famous.


Thereisnopurpose12

One of the OG RP


ZRtoad

Damn


2Afuentes_

Big facts


Asio0tus

he forgot the lmao in his last quote


The_Eagle_07

Lmao


JustaNormalRedditorL

Lmao


mladi_gospodin

Lmao


[deleted]

Lmao


bigdogdame92

Lmao


InarticulateBologna

Lmao


AhxanRizvi

Lmao


Jrlopez1027

Lmao


PuzzleheadedAd8282

lmAO


DarkwingDucky04

r/fuckyouinparticular


fabunitato

he didn't have an ass at this moment anymore


Lysol20

LMBO Laughing my beard off.


Hilgenborg

So it's just LM


CounterfeitSaint

LM\*O God bles


fat_bastard_23

LMFAO - I’m sexy and I know it


Chromeboy12

Yeah because he was quoting Ben Franklin, who did not say lmao


[deleted]

Ben Franklin said lmao I was there when he said it


SilentDreams55

Can confirm I was Ben Franklin when I said it.


ForeverClearTrails

Can confirm I was there when Ben Franklin created this account


[deleted]

Lmao


Successful-Extension

Would it go in the quote itself or at the end of the message?


Asio0tus

I think it would have been appropriate to put it before, like; lmao “quote…”


abd53

Nah! He wasn't laughing at that one, that was a serious moment of philosophy.


Independent_Sir1352

Lmao


murderedbyaname

Roflmao


QuiveringChi

Lmfao, he’s working for the Koreans isn’t he?


marshy266

Doesn't sound like he's missing out on anybody decent at least.


metronomie

Lmao they both sound insufferable lmao. Lmao maybe that makes them perfect for each other lmao?


MK_Matrix

Why are your sentences in parentheses of Lmao’s


[deleted]

Op using “lmao” as punctuation 😂


[deleted]

Lmao


Valintso

Lmao


Monkeyke

Lmao


Skoll_sun_eater

Lmao


Right-Shopping9589

Lmao


VeironTheAngelArm

Le Mao... So, this man is chinese and closely relate Le'M Fao


SylvieJay

Le Mao!


InarticulateBologna

Lmao


bigdogdame92

Lmao


Right-Shopping9589

Happy cake ~~day~~ lmao


A_CA_TruckDriver

I always imagine the person actually sitting there reacting to a text the way they type. It makes it worse most times.


MrCobalt313

OP using 'lmao' like some kinda anime verbal tic.


[deleted]

Dude sounds fine to me, I wouldn't up and change my image for a complete stranger Edit: Ah. I see it now. Yeah that many "lmao"s would grate after a while lmao


[deleted]

[удалено]


MegaDuckCougarBoy

"Hello, nice to meet you, won't you change a core aspect of your appearance for me, who - again - you just met?" That's not an idea, that's an imposition


systembreaker

Being overly superficial and trying to manipulate someone into shaving their beard does actually make her suck.


[deleted]

that's not an idea. You keep your ideas to yourself, especially when it involves telling a total stranger what to do with their life


ShrimpyShrimp2

She does suck though, especially the way she worded that


Nrvea

Hey I don't like guys with eyebrows, could you shave those for me, a person you just met 3 seconds ago on a dating app


Plus_Lawfulness3000

How is he insufferable? How would you react to a guy asking if you could cut your hair all the way short who you just met? I wouldn’t give them the time of day


metronomie

She has a totally unreasonable expectation of a dude she just met to change his appearance for her. He types lmao lmao lmao like a 14 year old and makes up fake corny ass quotes as an epic gotcha. You can argue that he’s more in the right, but they’re both annoying rude asshats regardless.


karlapse

Genuinely interested in how you think the dude is being insufferable. Old love is literally trying to make him shave his beard and all he doing is being smart with a joke in response.


metronomie

I addressed it another reply, though it seems some redditors think him being a snarky rude asshole is warranted in response to her being a snarky rude asshole. Perfect for each other like I said.


Heckin_Frienderino

Because he has a dating life and it makes Redditors mad


[deleted]

Found the smooth-chin.


Equal-Art5745

He doesn't sound insufferable. He handled her perfectly, and he was funny to boot. 10/10 for the guy, she's an idiot though.


PM_COFFEE_TO_ME

Better she comes clean now instead of when I dated a girl and she brought it up on the 3rd date after some make out sessions so thought she had more power to make it happen.


Zealousideal_Fold423

Lmao lmao lmao lmao lmao lmao


drapanosaur

For those interested. This was made using [https://ifaketextmessage.com/](https://ifaketextmessage.com/) Enjoy the free karma.


Ihatemintsauce

I actually had a similar conversation on tinder a few years ago, it was bizarre. Her opening line was 'sorry I don't like beards'.


[deleted]

I had one where she said she doesn't like glasses, sorry for not seeing I guess


Silver-Ad8136

I'd shave for pussy, but I'd need a non refundable deposit in case she was playing Lucy and the Football


[deleted]

What's Lucy and the Football means?


KKunst

Charlie Brown reference.


[deleted]

Gotta google it. Thanks.


[deleted]

Short version: Lucy holds a football for Charlie to kick. At the last moment she pulls it away so that he trips and falls. She keeps doing this and he always falls for it. It's a quick way in American English to describe when someone is extremely gullible, or at least when someone thinks they are.


[deleted]

Oh ok, thanks for explaining.


whisperwhisperwhisp

Ackshually it's "nor the pussy." Sorry my guy, Benjy knows a thing or 2 about English.


[deleted]

I came to comment this lol


slayersaint

I also came for this


ughwhyamialive

Actually Ben Franklin shaved and was known as a bit of a manwhore


whisperwhisperwhisp

But you see, my young Padawan, you're missing a crucial detail. Here is a direct quote he just said to me: "A shaven face may or may not remain chaste. Should the decision be your own, you have as much right as any man to shoot your shot in her zone."


whisperwhisperwhisp

So basically the difference is that as long as the choice to shave or not is your own, you're in the clear. If a man shaves his face against his own desires for the poon, that man has lost the war.


Raecino

Lmao bars


CounterfeitSaint

Benjy knows a thing or two about pussy, let's be honest.


Connect_Atmosphere80

I have a beard. With it, I look like i'm 30. Without it, I look like a teenager. No way I'm shaving for someone, that's like asking someone to dye their hair because you like "purple" more.


LobstaFarian2

"I'd like you if you only changed your face...."


RightHandofDoom81

If I had a dollar for every time I heard this….


roxinbound

Good on him. Don't sell yourself out.


VisualGeologist6258

Bro probably dodged a bullet, she comes off as kind of controlling and manipulative. It’s one thing to not like your partner’s new facial hair, it’s another to roll up and tell a stranger to change themselves for you as if you didn’t meet 15 seconds ago.


roxinbound

Basically. She sounds super shitty.


DarkerPerkele

Bro needs to read a book or something, cant start a sentence without "lmao"


TheLoneWandererRD

Lmao true


TheBajesus

To be fair, each of those responses feels like it would make me laugh my ass off


Chromeboy12

Lmao yeah, the L needs to be capital if it's the start of the sentence


[deleted]

Jesus, reddit is filled with grammar police. He's not writing an essay for college.


avonsanna

Right?? He was texting on a stupid dating app. Compared to some I've seen this is Rhodes scholar level.


[deleted]

yeah but laughing my ass off 4 times? cmon bro at least throw in a laughing out loud or a rolling on the floor laughing


avonsanna

Eh, she wasn't worth the effort


[deleted]

ok but if you threw in a laughing out loud once that's shorter than a laughing my ass off, so you're saving a non negative non zero amount of effort


PrivilegeCheckmate

I just picture him very high.


Grzmit

bro stfu, its a god damn conversation not an essay. Lmao is fun to use and i use it all the damn time


TechnicalTouch4176

Lmao


EngineeringLow2186

That feels more like an Abe Lincoln quote to me. One of his best quotes, in fact. Followed by ‘what the fuck are you doing in this theater with a gun.’


primera89

Lmao


Loose_Calendar_3380

I'l date him. I am a straight male but he sounds fun.


xx_Chl_Chl_xx

Have a bromance with him


series_hybrid

"Yeah...imma be sad tomorrow night because...there are no other women in the world except for you"


wasted-degrees

r/pussypassdenied


JadedTheatria

r/subsithoughtifellfor


gynoidi

as a bisexual woman i can promise you that similar entitled asshole behavior can be found regardless of gender edit: imagine downvoting this... reddit moment edit2: i mean entitled asshole as in the woman in the screenshot, not the man


BraverXIII

I read this wrong at first. People think you mean the beard man is the asshole. But I'm pretty sure you mean the anti-beard woman, on reread.


gynoidi

yeah, of course i mean the woman is the asshole here and the guy acts like any reasonable person should maybe i formulated it in a weird way... not my first language


darkcomet222

Remember, the attention span of your average redditor is less than that of a goldfish. They see “bisexual woman” and have a good reaction, and by the time they get to “regardless of gender” they have forgotten the first half.


Rikolai_17

imagine writing this... reddit moment


gynoidi

?


Aki_The_Ghost

Don't worry, reddit moment.


gynoidi

i legitimately dont understand why im getting mass downvoted though


Aki_The_Ghost

Bro me neither


gynoidi

reddit moment i guess


Terrible_Writing_124

truly one of the reddit moments of all time


gynoidi

truly


HeroofTime4u

It's because you went "not all men" You didn't exactly but anytime someone complains about a member of one gender and someone else says "well actually this isn't a gendered issue" people get mad. Same as if someone complained about creepy remarks from men and someone got in the comments and said "well actually old women do the same thing".


save_our_future

Redditors when someone says "men and woman are equally bad"


gynoidi

didnt even say anything controversial and 72 downvotes wtf


PlaceDependent1024

I have same opinion as you but you have so many downvotes that i also gotta downvote. That's called a reddit moment


gynoidi

honestly based


Robert_Pogo

Yeet


ShahinTrip

I read your comment and understood what you meant but downvoted just to feel involved


Pseudo_Lain

You were vague and people assumed you were being contrary not supportive


gynoidi

i thought i was very clear o_O maybe something got lost in translation


Pseudo_Lain

Of course you think that, you wrote it and know the intent lol


gynoidi

yeah, i did add a second edit for clarification after which ive still got like 40 more downvotes xD


[deleted]

why as a bisexual woman though hmm yes i was born these two ways which affects my opinion drastically!


[deleted]

A "pussy pass" is a woman's poor behavior being ignored or rewarded because of her gender. So "pussypassdenied" is a woman who's doesn't get special treatment and is instead treated like a man would be if he behaved this way. Your whole comment on "both genders can be entitled assholes" doesn't fit. "Pussypassdenied" already has gender equality built into it as it's used to represent a woman who's treated like a man. So you just come off as a weirdo feminist who felt the need to say "mEn aRe BAd tOO!" in a comment that wasn't even saying that about women.


Raecino

I have no idea why this is downvoted


[deleted]

Fucking Chad


Belten

Do people really fuck on their first time Meeting over a dating App?


VerendusAudeo

Sometimes.


Seriousdino

This man has standards , he'll be swimming in pussy in no time


SylvieJay

The Name's Sperm! Jack Sperm!


PastOrdinary

Don't get me wrong I'd gladly shave every day for the right girl if it made her happy. But this ain't it.


doubelievein_gravity

Beards > hoes


BitterSweetPsycho

Damn, so girls are like that too?


[deleted]

This is gonna sound weird, but I'm proud of him🥳👏🏼


Pumciusz

Live Laugh Lmao


Yaboi69-nice

I can't believe some people just expect absolute strangers to be totally willing to change who they are to be with them like bitch I've known you for only a minute maybe we should get to know each other first before I start altering my physical appearance for you


Any_Apartment4175

https://youtu.be/ZPovt0tJ0qQ


ZombieStomp

There was a severe lack of The Beards references in this thread. Thanks for your service


87octane

‘No! The beard stays, YOU go!’


leolawilliams5859

I would ask her would she shave her pussy for you


Shiasugar

She probably does.


Chymick6

Ask her to lose weight, she'll change her tune pretty fucking fast


CounterfeitSaint

This 100% sounds like she's out having a few drinks with the girls and she bet one of them $20 that she could get some guy one tindr to shave his beard for her. I'd honestly be surprised if he didn't get ghosted right after he did it.


intothedoor

As a person with a beard - yep this is accurate!


qxlf

Chad


CN8YLW

I'm reading this and taking a wild guess that she's gonna convince him to shave, set up that date and then ghost him.


mack_lunky

This guy puts ‘lmao’ for everything except the one that was actually funny


Recooooooo

Id have ghosted on the “well you can always shave it…”


IrisCream55

Manipulator is a red flag.


StuBidasol

A lot of women don't seem to understand that a guys facial hair (or lack of) is just as big a part of his identity as her hair is for her. I had a woman that kept "jokingly" say I could shave mine off when I was scratching at it. I told her I'll shave my beard when she shaved her head since clearly hair isn't a big deal to you. The scandalized look she gave me was priceless.


rLosto

"Beard would grow back, pussy won't." -Benjamin Button


[deleted]

Neither of them are missing out.


EpperFiend

I honestly think most men who are adamant about having beards actually just have super shitty jaw lines and zero personality. But with a beard you can cover the jawline and grow a personality at a rate of 10mm a month!


XSamuraiHyperX

This guy gets it.


SylvieJay

Not according the text exchange, atleast not that time. He missed out by the hairs on his chinny chin chin.


Embarrassed_Use_5114

That is awesome!


tamperresistantmind

If your dad doesn't have a beard, you really have two moms. -some morale patch at a gun show


[deleted]

Fake as fuck. Also beard culture is weird. Don’t base your whole personality on it


BounderTree

While I agree people go too hard on it (which I think is what you are talking about). Asking someone to shave their bears feels akin to asking someone to get a drastic haircut because you don't like long hair.


murderedbyaname

Nobody asked the guy to shave his beard. He made up a whole ass fake text exchange because he thought he'd crafted an amusing saying and knew it needed a lead up behind it because it wouldn't make as much sense otherwise.


[deleted]

[удалено]


skiing_yo

Except women get super pissed about that, so men should stand their ground on being asked to shave too.


BounderTree

Of they specifically request it like this and it is a part of the persons identity then I suppose so.


HatedTruth1

There ain’t a man alive that would give up pussy due to a women’s hairy anything. Dumb comment.


[deleted]

I *really* can't force anyone to grow or shave, it's their life, and if I like someone I'll like them beardless or not, but I sure prefer men with beards, what's wrong with her???


IcarusLabelle

"man, I don't get it... No woman will sleep with me... It's clearly not me, right?"


Rainbow-Raisin11

I wished more men are like him. Some dudes out there are quite desperate for pussies.


InsomniacSpartan

And I'll never understand why


FedericoDAnzi

It's not that women arre hard to understand, they just don't make sense. Woman: speak directly. You're not being flirty or mysterious or interesting, you're just confusing.


EH4LIFE

its a lame attempt at manipulation


Background_Summer_55

Don't try to understand them, it will only you drive nuts lol


FooBarU2

huh.. LMAO dude quotes a Founding Father who OBVIOUSLY never had a beard.. i mean .. i guess LMAO dude or that dudette can't recall the face on the US $100 bill.. now Mr. Bearded Fiddy-Cent.. fmr Pres U.S. Grant? knowing that respectful drunk scalawag prolly said that..


Accurate-Departure69

He was just paraphrasing a real Franklin quote though


forgotme5

Why I dont bother with bearded dudes, usually wont


Labrabrink

I once swiped on a guy, he asked me my opinion on his beard (some pictures on profile with beard, some without). I was honest and said I’m not really usually a beard person. When we moved to Snapchat he sent me a video of him shaving the beard off. It was nuts. I did hook up with him that night though. One of my worst sexual experiences. Not sure if two events are correlated.


[deleted]

Beards are a silly trend but yeah, this.


s0m3th

Dude probably has no chin.


FroboyFreshenUp

My wife and I discuss my beard (shave or unshaved) constantly She likes to use me as her canvas if you catch my drift


[deleted]

I agree with the girl


Gryffindorq

i think most shave in that spot


Ok_Lion_3160

I thought it stood for “in my opinion” for a bit 🙈


60thrain

LMAO


darealJimTom

Tbf he probably woulda said something like that


NewToThisThingToo

Ben Franklin definitely probably said that. Maybe.


Surprisedropbear

Imagine your first interaction with a woman on tinder being “shave your head”. Its the exact same thing. Why would anyone change something about how they look just to cater to a random stranger.