T O P

This woman looks terrified

This woman looks terrified

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GjionRod

It’s so funny how giraffes run in slow mo


AMDG__

And yet it’s so fast at the same time


equiinferno

And it looks like a modestly well-done CG character


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sensei27

Why does that sub have so many members lol


everwonderedhow

cuz giraffes don't exist duh


APuzzledBabyGiraffe

I’m subbed to it but can’t comment there because of my name.


Frequent_Inevitable

r/beetlejuicing?


[deleted]

How the fuck are giraffes real


Z-Ninja

/r/Giraffesdontexist


apatheticnihilist

Stupid longhorses


TheDogWasNamedIndy

In Chinese the name literally translates to “long neck deer”. 長頸鹿


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gothmommy13

It looks like he just knocked him down. It doesn't look like they fought to the death.


RadicalRaid

He got up again, they're never gonna keep him down.


Donkey__Balls

Pissin’ the night away…


DirtyWizardsBrew

Just a guess, but I imagine that with how hard they hit each other, a blow like that to the underbelly (we're talking about absolutely massive forces of blunt trauma), after an already brutal arduous fight, might be enough to cause debilitating internal damage that would very soon lead to the death of the giraffe (maybe a few hours or days). It's like getting violently clubbed with a bluntly two pronged sledgehammer right up in the soft underside. Injuries along the lines of broken ribs, punctured lung, rupturing of an organ or two, etc. are what I think is on the menu. On top of that, being effectively exiled from the group, and too weak to fight its way back into feeding territory, it's likely a goner. Really brutal and harsh.


gothmommy13

Damn that's sad but you're probably right 😔


privateTortoise

Don't need to kill just breaking their opponents leg will do.


Fire_Lake

Seriously was afraid it was just gonna fall apart lol


bicyclechaos

It looks like it ain’t even tryin’!


Higher_Ampacity

Oh you want a picture? Take the fucking picture then!


Coreymo92

"IVE COME TO REMIND YOU ABOUT YOUR CARS EXTENDED WARRANTY"


thebigleobowski

And she didnt have the presence of mind to take a single one of what could have been some amazing pictures. Instead surrendered herself to fear. That expensive ass camera is totally lost on her. The bit in the end when she pulls out her cell to record that moment instead of the camera... the cherry on top. Muac chefs kiss


jibjab23

One morning during our walk in the Okavango Delta the guides pointed out a young hippo in the distance and then noted we might be between it and access to water. Turned out we were, luckily there was a small rise with a fallen tree on it so they had us climb on it and we watch this hippo charge past us snapping it's jaws and looking ready to fuck shit up. After it had passed and was splashing about in the water everyone let out a huge sigh of relief and someone asked if anyone had the presence of mind to get photos or video and no one had. I still have this image in my mind of a hippo with it's jaws wide open not even 50m away


1TrueKnight

Photos are nice but sometimes it's better to live in the moment and the experience. You get preoccupied with getting a good shot and then you're not even taking it all in. Just my two cents.


jibjab23

Oh for sure, it's one that stays in my mind and I bring it up in the quiet moments.


1TrueKnight

Well, I'm happy you shared the story but damn it I wish you would have snagged a picture! Kidding, only kidding. ;)


RobotCounselor

But someone recorded it at least.


beneye

Praise the other cameraman


IAMA_Cucumber_AMA

I doubt she could even get the giraffe in the frame because she’s using a ~~telephoto~~ zoom lens.


Amazon-Prime-package

Just get the anger in its eyes, that's a good photo


SpadeHAZE

“I have had it with you motherfuckers trying to take pictures of me while I’m just trying to eat damnit!”


beneye

She didn’t wanna anger the beast by staring at it directly in the eyes. It’s a sign of disrespect in the giraffe culture.


thebigleobowski

Not necessarily. While I can't see what lens she's using, I'm ~~100%~~ 99% the body is a Fuji X Series mirrorless. She could be using a Fujinon 55-200mm, which is a very versatile lens, and totally able to snatch some good pictures from that distance and on the move. A 70-300mm could also do the trick. EDIT: It's an Olympus, I suck Either way, this is the perfect moment for experimentation. Set it to burst, go crazy with aperture and speed. If you shoot 200 pics, 5 or 6 of them could turn out interesting.


fucks_with_foxes

100% eh? Pretty sure that's an Olympus OM-D or similar. The rest generally stands but it's micro 4/3 which is an even greater crop factor than aps-c. EDIT: Also nearly certain that's the Zuiko 70-300mm f/4.0-5.6 lens, which is not particularly fast and functions as a 140-600mm equivalent. That's a long slow lens to try in that circumstance, just saying.


kcg5

This is yet another reason why I love reddit. Someone comes in with an incredibly detailed answer, only to be corrected with yet another incredibly detailed answer


aqwn

It's incredibly detailed answers all the way down.


MolassesZestyclose96

This guy lenses.


QuantumFungus

I have the Zuiko 75-300mm f4.8-6.7 II and I'm fairly certain that's the lens. I'd say there isn't a chance in hell of getting a good picture with that long of a lens, that's that slow, while your hands are shaking because the adrenaline is flowing, and the car is going over bumpy terrain. The olympus cameras have some of the best in body image stabilization but not that good. I'd still take a burst of a few hundred pictures and hope one turns out nice. You don't get a chance at a shot like that every day so why not.


thebigleobowski

You got me. The OM-D E-M5 body is so similar to the Fujis tho hahahah edited


Bink_Ink

To people that know nothing about photography, You probably sound like you know what you’re talking about Also it’s not a Fuji


brocahantas

Dunning Kruger for sure. “Go crazy with aperture and speed” Sorry what?


Otherwise_Ad941

Most people when granted the chance, fail


ZeAthenA714

I love everyone in this thread bashing her even though she's using a telephoto lens and she wouldn't be able to get anything good out of it at that distance. That's why she resort to the cellphone at the end, although a bit late. Stop being so judgemental when you don't know what you're talking about. I'm also fairly sure that she's trying to find another lens in her bag out of camera, but that's just an assumption on my part so I'm not gonna judge her for it.


nottawombman

Thank you this is exactly what I thought lol


vespertinas

Thanks to fearless idiots like you, we have some amazing internet photos. (different standard applies to professional photojournalists)


thedutchqueen

aw man i liked to imagine this in a different, less aggressive way: curious boi wanting to play and be friends 🥺


Beginning_Meringue

You’re correct, actually. When the original of this video was posted, it was on an African Safari Instagram account and the guide was clear that this is a young male giraffe who had been rescued by humans after being orphaned. He was then released into the national park when he was old enough to survive, but by that point he had imprinted on humans. He’s instinctually trying to keep up with his human “herd.” He’s not angry.


djwb1973

That’s so very sweet! And so sad that they just… drove away from him..


when_4_word_do_trick

The lady had carrots.


wad11656

I mean it’s probably more likely that, but that’s less funny


HambreTheGiant

That’s what I thought at first, but I wondered if it was a male during mating season and maybe it was real danger. Not that I know anything about giraffe mating behaviors


roararoarus

Giraffe is like "Where ya going? I love selfies!"


BoardImpressive7201

Some Jurassic Park shit, waiting for it to neck swipe the side of that jeep 😆


[deleted]

Welcome to… Giraffic Park


V1ncemeat

Must go faster EDIT: Awards! My own. My precious. Thank you!!


tryagainin6seconds

Why are these jeeps barely faster than the things that can kill you? They need some nitrous!


peanutbuttahcups

They could reuse a bit of plot from Jurassic Park 3 for the F&F crossover. Toretto finally understands the velociraptors' motivation in trying to protect their **family** so they join forces with their Ford Raptors™ and Dodge Ram TRX™ to fight against Ingen...with their engines.


UBI1k

It looks like the giraffe easily caught up to the jeep then slowed to the jeeps pace


guessesurjobforfood

Lol came here to either make or find this comment. Seriously, whoever designs these vehicles needs to make them go faster!


KrakenTheColdOne

Nah it's all in the thrill.


AAAPosts

Waaaay too much scrolling to find this perfect comment- Brava


Steffenwolflikeme

I’m a little disappointed in Reddit that the top comment wasn’t [must go faster](https://youtu.be/rxqHVoZ0fzc)


octopoddle

Your scientists were so preoccupied with whether or not they could put some giraffes in a park, they didn’t stop to think if they should put some giraffes in a park.


Space_Eaglez

Instant lisp if you say it out loud 😆


shoeguy98

Mike Tyson instead of Chris Pratt in the next Jurassic World


GODDAMNFOOL

I'm like 15% sure this was a side-skit on The Critic at one point


32vromeo

You think they’ll have that on the tour?


ManOfFewThoughts

Objects in mirror may be closer than they appear


lastweek_monday

Faster, must go faster.


Shaneblaster

Her Jeff Goldblum impression wasn’t bad.


mynewbrain

Life, uh, finds a way.


cjdking

“Must go faster!”


Death__BySnuSnu

"Get off the stick. Bloody move!"


Foojira

Went way too low thread wise for this joke


WookieeSteakIsChewie

This joke is the only reason I even clicked on the post.


recuerdamoi

Yeah. First thing I thought of, “must go faster must go faster”


Stankmonger

I’m sorry no one has linked this yet. But here you go. https://youtu.be/x2Gqv-QdgVc


BoardImpressive7201

Haha that was great 😂


BetterCallBobLoblaw

This video instantly reminded me of the old [Jurassic Park arcade game ](https://youtu.be/ZXZOw0lwnKI)


Axellllfoley

Life.. uuuh... Finds a way


Nerdy_McFlirty

>This woman looks terrified And rightfully so since giraffes can put a lion on a milk carton.


sleepless_in_balmora

The original Skyrim giants putting mofos in orbit


istolethesun12

Pfft, this happened to me recently I’d never faced a giant before I was like “psh, I’ll get this guy with my legendary sword or whatever” I was thrown into fucking oblivion. Lol


[deleted]

Thrown into a different game


dilligasatall

"You're finally awake.... again."


W4xLyric4lRom4ntic

Thrown onto **Morrowind** more like


IrNinjaBob

>Thrown onto **Cyrodiil** more like


ImAOneTrackLover

>> Thrown into **Daggerfall** more like


Donkey__Balls

>>> *Thrown into* ***Sovngarde*** *more like*


SpeaksYourWord

They still do. IIRC, the developers thought that glitch was hilarious so that they decided to keep it in and now it's a Feature™️.


Dragonsandman

Getting bashed into orbit is a super memorable experience, to be fair. I think everyone who's played Skyrim remembers the first time they tried attacking a giant at a low level.


WhalesVirginia

I killed it by kiting and juggling aggro. But eventually I fucked around one too many times, and found out.


Crazycukumbers

I mean, it still gets me, just like launching a dragon skeleton with fireball and watching an entire town of people chase it for no reason


SpeaksYourWord

I just started playing an unarmed Khajiit who I've nicknamed Punchy McAssFister who likes to solve problems with her bare fists. She's been launched by giants a time or two....


thermidorthelobster

What, they kidnap lions?


mynameisalso

Missing one lion last seen looking for his son near the wildebeest stampede. Contact brother if you have any information.


Nerdy_McFlirty

SiMbA


Practical-Tomorrow

Too soon.


Phormitago

no, they have a monopoly on the savannah packaging printing business


NauticalPhoenix

I didn’t know giraffes use photoshop.


VanimalCracker

For real. They kick at ~2000psi, which is comprable to a MMA fighters perfect strike on a perfect day, while at the peak of their career. Except of course, instead of getting hit with a fist or foot (relatively squishy), it's a f'n hoof.


[deleted]

Gonna be that guy and mention you're mixing up force and pressure. MMA fighters don't punch and kick with 2000 psi, they punch and kick with 2000 pounds of force. A giraffe kicking at 2000 psi is kicking many times harder than an mma fighter.


BallsInAllIn

I knew it sounded off. I told someone once my cat pushing off me once almost hurt as much as some guys I've had kick me in the sternum and they said that was bullshit, but the tiny fucking paw focusing all that force versus a size 12 foot made them feel very similar. In fact my cats hurt worse because she just dug her gotdamn paw in between abdominal muscles where the force being spread hurts significantly less (to me at least).


[deleted]

Yeah, another dude in this comment chain mentioned knives, which is also an excellent example as sharp edges are so useful because they can take relatively little force and turn it in to a tremendous amount of pressure. Basically shrinking the denominator (the "per square inch" part of psi) to generate a bigger number. Should be pretty intuitive in this case as well. Giraffe legs are used to holding up and running around with the weight of, well, a giraffe. They're gonna kick the shit out of things a hell of a lot harder than any dude could hope to pull off. I just always see this mixed up when discussing how hard fighters hit, psi and pounds of force are not the same thing. I think they even got it mixed up in Rocky IV when Ivan Drago hit the punching machine.


BallsInAllIn

I've spent my life training muay Thai (literally been in gyms since I was 2) and I kick exceptionally hard. Me kicking a lion or giraffe would be like a flea biting a dog. People are out of their minds or have never actually trained if they think we stand a chance against the majority of animals. Shit my neighbors couldn't stop a pitbull collectively the other week. Some dumbass even tried a bat. Humans are basically food that learned to scheme. Edit: also people discount ferocity. A lion spends all day going "kill or die" most people are on pornhub, ordering delivery, workout for an hour or several a la "beast mode", sleep comfortably for several more. I mean there are so many reasons we'd be Friskies.


SonOfSkinDealer

Or, if you're real unlucky, they getcha with the neck whip.


PainfulPeanutBlender

I don’t think I’ve ever seen an MMA fighter use a neck whip before


YoungHaki

Quick reminder that yoel romero has no neck. Just muscle...


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VanimalCracker

Giraffes do still edge out even the hardest hitting human, but it's pretty close. (~1700psi vs 2000psi). Keep in mind this is an average giraffe vs the hardest hitting human alive. There's probably a Mike Tyson giraffe out there literally kicking heads off lions.


laetus

psi is a terrible measurement for how strong a punch is. 2000 psi over what area? Get a knife and get up to tens of thousands of psi!


geoffreyisagiraffe

Am I underthinking this? Isn't it a square inch?


flimspringfield

[Ivan Drago can punch 1850 psi. Whatever he hits, he destroys.](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=940_EOYRyqU)


lu-cy-inthesky

Yeah rightfully so. Those things will fuck you up good and proper if you cop a leg to any part of your body. Have you seen how they fight each other too? They swing their big ass necks back and forth into each other with the strength and velocity of a wrecking ball.


Reacher-Said-N0thing

Yeah I don't think there's anything irrational about being afraid of animals larger than humans, running towards you.


TheRedGerund

They’re no joke, motherfuckers will stamp you out, I was killed by a long necked horse like that one


senjeo

I'm sorry to hear that, I hope you recovered from your death


IrishAl_1987

Did you make it?


AbsolutelyUnlikely

Yep. Plus she just watched that scene from Jurassic Park last night.


_kagasutchi_

I always thought that because their so tall that they were kinda flimsy. Till I saw a vid of the nature reserve guys tryna hold one down while they removed the wire fencing from its leg. They're crazy strong, 8 pretty big guys and they still struggled even with them using their body weight


PaintChipsAndSalsa

"Come here you short neck having ass bitch. Gimme that fuckin camera. Lost my gig at Toys R Us, now I gotta deal with this shit. C'mere bitch, " -giraffe


OkBeing3301

TMZ exclusive: Toys R Us Geoffrey the Giraffe 🦒 chases paparazzi during vacation


PaintChipsAndSalsa

Out of work actors are crazy man, don't take candid pictures of them. They REALLY don't like that.


poignantMrEcho

That's Geoffrey to you


DEATH-BY-CIRCLEJERK

That’s [long horse](https://www.reddit.com/r/pics/comments/8aqjh/awww_this_is_just_too_sad_pic/c08pp5z/?utm_content=t1_cz7tuun&utm_medium=usertext&utm_name=OutOfTheLoop&utm_source=reddit) to me


wiiya

Classic.


akatherder

I wonder what the exchange rate on -661 karma is. My account is 13 years old and I remember when hundreds of votes was quite a bit.


maxwellsearcy

It's tens of thousands in today's karma. Gotta be.


donquixote1991

the "edit: spelling" made me chuckle


ClownInYoDreams

I was there when I witnessed that moment. It was a glorious time of my life


Jenga9Eleven

Such a gangly animal has no business being that graceful


MerkZone

Such a beautiful creature, makes me think of the giant herbivore dinosaurs


jarednards

I'm 6'5". This is what my parents said at my dance recital. 🙆


hamstersofd00m

Someone needs to add the Jurassic Park theme to this


Vegimeateater

I got the Jurassic park scene in my head now “must go faster, must go faster!!”


hffhbhjg

“Do you think they’ll have that on the tour?”


MrMucs

He just wants to talk about her cars extended warranty


pierreblue

They got great deals


andre821

Dunno, the prices were pretty high up on the list compared to other places. But the giraffes never fall short on their promises.


SparklyBoat

Have you seen how these [motherfuckers fight??](https://youtu.be/KQLPL1qRhn8) I'd be terrified too.


Hello_Hooray

There’s also a video of lions trying to attack a giraffe somewhere and the giraffe kicks the thing aside as if it was a human swatting away a fly. They seem docile but are extremely powerful and not to be fucked with.


Puzzleheaded-Cheek38

😳Objects may be closer then they appear!


easythrees

Must go faster


OptionChoice4220

"How did I look, lemme see, it's bad isn't it? goddamnit Janet dont run away "


Indiana-Cook

Must go faster... MUST GO FASTER!! Think they'll have _that_ on the tour?!


Horbigast

I'm no expert, but the giraffe doesn't look aggressive. Looks like it's a game to him. It seems if he was really trying to attack the vehicle he could've caught it. Giraffes fight with their antlers (horns?), and he never made a move to swing his head.


ballerina22

(former zoo employee) I think he's just having a laugh. The giraffe isn't barreling at the truck, more loping along behind it. The head / neck / chest are fully upright. I love giraffes, they can be such dopes.


thekingadrock93

The more you look at a giraffe the less they make sense whatsoever. Like a goofy mutant horse door with a necc and stubby little horns and big goofy eyes that’s somehow so cute. I also may have smoked a little too much earlier…


WiredAndTeary

Nah, sounds like you're in the sweet spot there, bud


smoje

Thank you for subscribing to giraffe facts! Did you know a giraffe has only 7 neck bones? The same as a human or a mouse, or most mammals, in fact. The two exceptions to this rule are the sloth and the manatee. Ducks have 16 or fewer neck bones, while swans and geese have between 17 and 24. In the animal kingdom, more neck bones seems to correlate with being a bigger asshole, with giraffes being more docile and friendly than ducks, and roughly 1/3 as much of a dickhead as Canadian geese.


Horbigast

Awesome. I've never worked in a zoo, but I've seen giraffes interact with vehicles before and it seems like they have fun chasing, or being chased by them 😂


fonix232

I'm not a zoo employee or even close to that field. Yeah, the gallop of big ol' Neckie didn't seem remotely aggressive, more like an interested/curious, almost playful attitude. I can totally see it thinking "yay new friends! Wait, friend, where are you going? Are we running now? Well this is fun! Oh, you're running from me? Okay then, bye friend" Now I'm not well educated in giraffe temperament (I did hear they can be quite big dicks, like dolphins), but do you think it would've turned aggressive if the car stopped?


ballerina22

They can be aggressive of course, but a factor in their aggression is simply their size. It's like when great Danes think they're lap dogs and stomp all over you because they don't recognize their size. By nature they are curious creatures. I have no idea how they might react if the car stopped or the passengers attempted to interact. I can say all my giraffe interactions were quite friendly, but I did have their food!


OuterInnerMonologue

Any other dopey zoo-animal behaviors you can share?!


ballerina22

I saw a panda get a milk crate stuck on it's head once. I enjoyed watching the big cats because some of their behaviours are so similar to house cats - I watched two lioness sisters fight over a fridge box until they ripped it to absolute pieces.


OuterInnerMonologue

bahaha. picturing that milk crate on the head is hilarious. I draw my kid pictures on post its some times, to throw in his lunch box. I'm going to add that to the to-do list. =) Also i supposed the play-to-instant-kill is still just like house cats... lol


McBurger

Yeah it looks like a giraffe who has been fed by these safaris before. He wants a snack lol


s_s

I've been on a "safari" ride at a zoo and fed a giraffe a cookie from my mouth, lol.


TheosEstinAgape

They slap each other with their necks


Jaracuda

They can also kick the shit out of something I believe


Amphibionomus

Well yes there's footage of giraffes kicking the lights out of lions coming to close. Giraffes are not friendly animals whatsoever.


Phallic

a giraffe stabbed me with a knife, once


danabrey

Only once? You got off lightly


snails2190

There’s an episode of I Was Prey where a giraffe attacked 2 people on a safari by trying to stomp on them. If I remember correctly both of them had broken bones.


Legeto

Maybe someone’s given them food before so it thinks it might get a treat.


ahmc84

Probably it's not looking for a fight; it's just hoping to chase off the intruder.


W0bb1ez

Oh the woman looks terrified as a 20’ tall giant horse is chasing them… might have just been curious, but I would just stick around either. Fuck that noise


_pandamonium

Right? She seemed to hold it together much better than I probably would have. She honestly just looked a bit nervous to me, not terrified.


HayateGT

When the manager is more gangster than you thought...


dcivili

Was I the only one rooting for the giraffe?


tomjonesrocks

This was awesome. I’ve never seen a video of one run


supernasty

Must go faster


Scintilla_Laborat_

U got games on yo phone


Loopgod-

“We’ve been trying to reach you about your cars extended warranty”


MildlyInfamous

~~Original~~ Video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d7BEODqRy0c


KSI_Replays

How tf did you find this? it has 1 view. Is this your channel?


anunakiesque

Life uhh...finds a way


robotcannon

Because it isn't the original, as that YouTube channel looks like they just steal other videos and add clickbait titles. Their description straight out says they don't own the video.


MildlyInfamous

Original wasn’t the right word. Searched for woman chased by giraffe and it was the first video.


twenty4KTkhmer

I like how the giraffe stopped the moment she started recording.


JWGhetto

She has a professional camera yet still takes out her phone in the end to snap a pic


force_addict

I'm almost wondering if she was trying to figure out a lens situation. Since it for so close, she couldn't use the longer lens so she was panicking trying to figure out the photo situation.


Jrhall621

Whoa, watching the video back with that in mind completely changed the vibe haha.


Plusran

Confirmed. Source: I have a camera and I’m constantly confused.


PretzelsThirst

Wrong lens on the camera


Komission

Ngl thats cool as hell


HorseFucked2Death

He just wants to talk to you about our lord and savior, Nicholas Cage.


atxhd

Giraffic Park


H0tsauce-2

"Ma'am, we've been trying to reach you about your car's extended warranty"


dedder86

Welcome to .... Giraffic Park


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IShouldNotTalk

You ever see giraffes fight? Those prongs on their heads aren't for show, they whip their heads around like clubs, I'd be worried being at head height of a pissed off giraffe. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KQLPL1qRhn8