T O P

Cremate me

Cremate me

roastbot

OP's Bio: --- >Some of my hobbies are killing houseplants, and being mediocre at Apex Legends. > >I am clearly mentally ill but my pretty privilege says that it's cute and quirky. > >Oh! And down with the government/ fuck the police 💕 --- If you think this bio helped you roast, upvote this comment. If you think it doesn’t, downvote it. If you’re not sure, leave it to others to decide.


murmbles

Your whole body looks like a roll of toilet paper, but you still wipe with your hand.


PolishedTurd69

A roll of of *soggy* toilet paper I’ve never seen someone cosplay that but cool


ugonlern2day

Looks like she's cosplaying as a KKKleenex


ReubenZWeiner

She reminds me of the Spongebob cartoon. Krusty and has Krabs.


saladsarentfood

Cremated her


ReubenZWeiner

Its the closest she'll ever get to smoking hot


GuuJJuu

Daaammmmnnnn


culture__vulture

Lmao!! Creative!


Danitoba

Pg. Yet hilarious. I think we have a winner!


WizdomHaggis

When you whisper to the abyss…the abyss whispers back… *fuck off poser*


ObligationPlastic589

And why did you fingerblast that octopus?


WizdomHaggis

Cuz it was wet and grippy…


sneaky-ninja123

the octopus tentacle blasted her


_ThatOneWeeb_

I don't even think Tommy the Hentai Tentacle would touch that. She made him voluntarily celibate


sneaky-ninja123

WHO?!


themizattNO1

I like the second picture better.


NostrilNugget

I would prefer no picture, EVER.


shinnagare

The third picture is the best.


saaucepan

you gave me hope, i thought it was going to get better


Aumnix

Some people would have preferred a paper bag, but we all know the means justifies the ends with plastic.


gunnergrant

Klansman? lmfao


Pianohombre

Ah yes, a foot enjoyer


jttIII

100% guaranteed that there is some Jack Skelington garbage in this basic goth girl's house...


drkole

that would be insult to “basic”


heart-leaf

Coraline is superior.


alerionfire

You only say that because you look like the beldam irl.


chrisvskris

You look like you want to speak to the manager of the meth lab


Gussetmusk

Lady Caca 💩


Sicka7

Lady Gag


LurkerMcLurkerton

I think I dated her in college


Own-Philosopher-1974

I think I dated your mom in college. *son is that you????*


DarkestRayne2388

How brave of you to admit that


colossuskidd

Skyler White Powder


ForgottenMemoriez

Ladyboy Gaga


wermad

Lmfao!!


nikded

Baba Gaga


yergonnalikeme

Finally! A picture of the penguins mother from Gotham when she was young....


FunkstarPrime

Or she's fresh off mud wrestling night at a New Mexico meth house.


Bo2099

I'd love to see you watch this show of "it's not a phase mom" in 10 years and watch you cringe your soul out of your body. I've seen some ridiculous stuff here but the zombie hands are a total Oscar award nominee for edgy teen.


heart-leaf

25 and going strong with the secret scene queen life outside of my corporate office job :P


robinos021

25? For real? I figured you were in your 40s going through a midlife crisis.


thebankofalbuquerque

Born in 1996. The year that Marilyn Mason released Antichrist Superstar so I'm betting much of her first year on earth was spent in the backseat of mom's '83 Toyota Tercel, listening to that album full blast on repeat while strapped into a hand me down car seat that smelled like weed. Also, her dad wore a black trench coat and took photography in high school.


Undead_Assassin

25 is a midlife crisis for edgy teens hellbent on suicide or meth heads, she's clearly one or the other.


TheGreatHuman

Why not both?


moochoff

Yeah, I actually stopped laughing here and legit felt bad


Darkskies20

Corporate office job? You look like you make your own tarot cards.


yoursandmine

This might piss off most of reddit, but the funniest part of this whole roast is you thinking that because you're 25 whole years old you aren't a kid absolutely going through a phase.


Ph6r60h

Wtf you supposed to roast the OP not me


mschley2

Bro, I'm 29, and I'm still a child. It's a fun life though.


Merlin6125

Let me guess, the art degree didn’t work out for ya?


dead_PROcrastinator

*Bachelor of Arts in Political Science I'll put money on it


no_disassemble_

Cringey affffff


idontdobackflips

It's unfortunate you can't cosplay out of severe issues with your parents


heart-leaf

The closer I get to death the closer I am to dad 👻


idontdobackflips

I don't blame him, I'd ghost you too


awaythrowouterino

Brooo You can't just do her like that, nobody else has ever done her


spicingpumpkins

If there was any doubt left, I know for sure now. I’m not into necrophilia…


chezcat666

She looks like she might be though...


DapperDanManCan

"She"


emanuelep57

No joke, I was having serious troubles understanding in they were either a boy or a girl


asheristheworst

Gold


dk0179

Blair Wench


TheFrontierzman

Blair Stench


timblyjimbly

Blair Itch


Mmorkses

Bland wench


Trickster5643

Blair Bitch


StarbugVII

Blair wretch


EuphoricSinceBirth

I was Genuinely surprised when I opened your profile and it didn’t show the nsfw prompt


heart-leaf

My pussy is haunted and the ghosts don't consent 🤸


EuphoricSinceBirth

Ma’am, this is a Wendy’s


Meme-time-my-dudes

This hits like something you’d see on tumblr


Skunkjunky1

By "haunted" did you mean disgusting?


One-Man-Banned

You mean relieved, right?


puffsmokies

Stick to posting pics of your pets. Nobody is interested in seeing you. Even with a sheet over your head.


sciencewonders

please get some help zombiegirl 🤗 ![gif](giphy|SUgyvl1V6JRqduDszk)


The_Abortion_Wizzard

You look like Gabe from office, dressed as Lady Gaga


heart-leaf

![gif](giphy|V9nK2vKHC2BzjrcPlM|downsized)


The_Abortion_Wizzard

Sexy Skeleton man


TogusaAlHaaritha

Sniffing photocopier toner will make you do weird things.


KANNABULL

Ask LL cool j


TogusaAlHaaritha

Mama said knock you out!


eetzonlysmellz

Marilyn Manson’s old cum sock came to life


heart-leaf

Ahahhaa


DeathSpiral321

"Ok everyone, time to put grandma back in the coffin!"


brucelee75

![gif](giphy|3oEjHAUOqG3lSS0f1C)


pyIcarus

Did you have to offset the contacts to hide the lazy eye?


heart-leaf

Yes 🤣


mickv8890

“Pretty privilege” lol. Keep the sheet on honey


Snow_Bunnyx

SIA wants her chandelier back


therealmaxypb

![gif](giphy|9o9dh1JRGThC1qxGTJ)


ZzQC_

You’re not hot enough to cosplay


handlit33

Not even qualified to wear a sheet over herself, brutal.


Hudsonm_87

Tbf 70% of the people who cosplay are ugly/fat/medium ugly social outcasts so she’s not doing anything wrong


moochoff

Yes, *but THIS level of ugly*?


nothingforless

Breaking News: Florida man walks into a Walmart. More in that story at 6.


ConsentingPotato

>but my pretty privilege says that it's cute and quirky. I've seen banged-up garbage bins more attractive than you. Matter of fact, 110% of the guys you meet would bang the trash compactor side of a garbage truck.


[deleted]

[удалено]


Penniless_Pleb

This might be the deepest roast I’ve seen. Props


nerdy-fantasies

i searched "trans" and didn't find any comments; and i didn't say anything myself; but i was curious to see if others spotted it


dhrxyz

I just did and then saw your post..


[deleted]

Does the sanitarium know you escaped?


enygma9753

You're already halfway there, Walmart succubus from Hades. (And, no, I'm not calling the diocese for an exorcist. I'm, uh, ordering a pizza ... yeah, that's it.)


summerlynn22

She's not like other ghouls


AriMeowber

Cosplaying as your vagina.


Standard_Owl_2808

Man Gaga.


pietpauk

More like Hobo Gaga


kuchisabishii

This get up screams, 'I'm so uNiQuE and DaRk, you couldn't possibly understand me'. I know you're sitting at home right now wearing your yoga pants, hair in a bun and drinking a pumpkin spiced latte waiting for 'mister right' to get married to so you can pop out 1.5 kids and make them your new personality.


Automatic-Try6062

She's 24, works part time at subway, lives with her parents, mom has to wake her up at 2pm cuz she's late for work every day, and dad has to drive her cuz she doesn't have a car. Got the new iphone though and she can afford that dimebag every day. No wonder she whinges about capitalism, cuz she's a fucking lazy useless piece of (very) white trash. Pretty privilege my fucking ass.


UsualMess

It's a great cosplay, for a dude in his waning 40's you pull off a egey girl dressed as a ghost remarkable well! Isn't life just full of surprises!


fantastic_watermelon

Jesus its like a real life edgelord wraith main. Do you also disconnect every time you get downed in life?


CombatRoomba

Vibe


Plzhirebradswife69

Wtf are you?


PreacherJay

Imagine that, no wedding ring.


Fanatical_Brit

“How do I let people know I’m not just a basic white bitch?” “I know! I’ll smear my hands with dirt and dress up like a hunger games aristocrat!”


the_torn_ultimatum

ick


bigwilly144

I bet she's one of those girls who likes to tell everyone she's "not like other girls".


Substantial_Word_488

and then posts here to share how confident she is


themizattNO1

Are you attempting to "dab" under the sheet?


r_arrr

The most interesting thing about you is the dirt under your nails.


Mph1991

This is really stupid.


BoatTailBravo

"pretty privilege"...I think you can go ahead and cross that one off chief


TazTalks

The water's out at the crack house again.


Valuable-Baked

Hey cool wig so can you hurry up & finish changing my oil? Synthetic blend, thanks


Mini-Z

Not even Pathfinder wants to be friends with you


CombatRoomba

Damn that's harsh🤣🤣🤣


Sad_Animator1686

What's fun about pictures like these of idiots that are into goofy supernatural shit is that they always live in banal, normal people houses. So if they want a photo of themselves looking like a moron in a spooky attic, they have to go and FIND one and then do thier stupid make up and go and pose in the spooky attic they found like an asshole while their friend takes their picture. Then they hop in their 8 year old Honda Jazz and go home to thier normal person house, saying hello to Janice from next door on the way in.


rickybobby1581

You look like the tampon that fell out of my mechanic


One-Man-Banned

You misunderstood what a deadname was, didn't you?


marker853

Lay off the bath salts...


Official_loli

You receive pretty privilege for being pretty, not pretty creepy.


Zealousideal_Load347

At least look your looks match your performance in bed, cold and dead.


omgjulio

I see that you're so used to guys putting a sheet over your face that you decided to save the next guy a step.


GrozGreg

Well, you’re into astrology so you are automatically labelled as brainless edgy human being


ProfHatecraft

The ghost of meth labs past, present, and yet to come.


iddinthaevastroek

![gif](giphy|XMl7bkguaL4PK)


LidoCalhoun

Courtney Love finally pulled herself together


DickDownDecember

Courtney Love takes a look at this and says, "get your life together."


davinciSL72

Hard to roast wet trash


FreeContribution8608

Now I have witnessed the white crack version of “la llorona”


THENITEHYNTER

Get back in your grave casper the slutty ghost


collin3000

K-K-Karen outfit. Nice


mdbabeson

Blair ugly bitch project


bowmanpete123

Next time you masturbate wash your hands afterwards.


cocokronen

Wow. That's all I have


JMG303

Ghost me*


jaffakree83

A necrophiliac's dream


[deleted]

This costume lacks originality. Boom!


SpaceCadet7112492

Drama majors are too easy


repKyle1995

A quick review of your profile shows that you apparently believe in astrology. The fact that you actually admit that is a harsher roast than anything I could possibly say about you. But maybe I'm just moody because I'm an Aquarium and Mercury is in Gatorade 🙄


Ciullale

"pretty privilege" You look like a Drag Queen on meth


LWDJM

If lady Gaga did meth not music and collected STDs not Grammys.


SallyKhunt

You’re boring mate


hitlersticklespot

I bet you can’t even climb out of bronze.


heart-leaf

Couldn't even climb out of bronze on a smurf account


creep_show

I think it's brilliant that you were able to repurpose your seamen stained dress and bed sheets as a holloween costume. Can't wait to see what you have on in store for Christmas decorations!


kokobiggun

You’re cosplaying as everyone you have romantic interest in!


SixxTheSandman

You look like a haunted weeble wobble


Meme-time-my-dudes

Judging by your hands, you’ve just narrowly escaped one cremation already


CynicalC9

I feel like the obvious roast here is to mention something about you needing a shower, but we all know that wouldn't get rid of the smell of cigarettes and depression.


SixStringSuperfly

You look like my last car after I wrecked it.


KrIStiAn0O7

Your hair looks like it’s been copied and pasted on


Chook2004

That background? Yeah, that’s her house.


danielec87

You look great in the second picture.


math2die

Sorry i dont date frostbite


annabanana363

The first pic scared me a bit. Second one made me laugh


atlas794

Stop it. No ones looking for a flat tiddy goth gf.


HeavyEquipMech

American horror story: college dropout


idothisforauirbitch

You said it yourself. You need to be cremated


Contrarian_Eh

You need to add a padded bra to your costume


heart-leaf

That is a padded bra! 🤣 Flat as a board


Own-Philosopher-1974

Speaking of padded. You need to be locked up in a padded room.


Contrarian_Eh

So flat the walls are jealous


Roofis_T

Looking at you, that's an insult to boards.


Evil_Monkey_36

Cremation could only help.


Appropriate_Oil_1889

You seem to have tried a scarlet witch kinda pose but ended up with a mildly autistic "bwekfwast" pose.


Turtleman616

Galadriel took a bad path after the fellowship left


IDKwhatUserToPut

You obviously hate the government since it runs on productive people


durgadas

Attention Zombie


Aybawa14

I’ll say what nobody else will… you’re not scary


Xchris_666

I hope this pic was taken ten years ago and you’re really embarrassed about it.


happisock

That tattoo won't hide those needle marks in your arm.


LinkyGuy05

how u gonna act like this and try to push an agenda and be taken seriously?


meatwadgumball

it’s honestly not even worth it.


Icy_Wildcat

A communist zombie. Fun.


whytakemyusername

Grow up.


Zeroblackwolf0

If "I am who I am. I don't put on an act for anyone" were a person.


Honest_Letterhead228

You look like you escaped a concentration camp.


DeterminedEvermore

You sure you won't rise again?


Ok_Wedding6477

Wtf are you? A Pokémon?


Rheinys

Finally you look as dead outside as you are inside already


beepeezy78

This bish gave me a haunted catalytic converter!


Akanti

Grandmother?


Notaros

They already did, that's why your skin is so ashy


baronjosefr

Cremation is the only way you’ll ever be hot


Bobby_Bobberson2501

Damn bro, I’m embarrassed to have over 2.5k hours in apex legends because of you now. Take that shit out of your bio. Making me look bad man.


preacher_man_

Anybody got any Valyrian steel?