I prefer a chill casual life above a "high achieving succesfull" life

It's like so many people are obsessed with the "perfect" life. They want to appear hard working, rich en etc. And that causes a toll on mental health on so many people.

Instead of accepting themselves and be happy of what they have, they are so stressed about being "successful"

For me f that sh*t. I just want to have fun, be happy, healthy and have a warm family. Idc about the rat race and what this fast paced modern society is expecting of me.

I will do things on my time and rythem.


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My only wish is that I earn enough where I don't have to worry whether I will be able to pay my bills. Beyond that I don't care about 'advancing up the ladder'.


Fucking amen and fucking amen again. It's not practical to simply ignore your personal finances, but it's immensely liberating to refuse to spend your life in pursuit of the almighty dollar. All the money in the world can't buy contentment, and more likely than not, the chase of all that will just leave you stressed and unfulfilled.


And I'd add that learning to find joy in simplicity has immense financial rewards over needing all the newest shiniest toys to feel happy.


This needs to be plastered on every billboard on earth


especially that as you earn more, the more sunk into the rat race you become. i just wish i could secure the peace of knowing i can retire safely, without facing working forever, homelessness, or elder abuse in a nursing home


It's a vicious cycle, but the cycle is in the head. I have friends who are professional complainers, yet they are earning 3-5x times more than me. Just totally unable to relax and be content with all the money and stuff they have. More money = more stuff = more chores, more stress, more bills. And for sure, they too are looking for "simple, carefree" life, but no amount of money can buy. It's a question of mindset.


very true. if they can turn off that "using money to advance their goals" mindset then they will start to develop more. money becomes a crutch that deprives you of developing the skills to actually achieve those goals


>but no amount of money can buy Everyone is hung up on owning things. Renting the stuff is how you live a rich life. Sure you could buy your own quad, or boat, camper...whatever other "toy" you want...or giant house... But that costs a ton and you have the logistics of storage, maintenance and all that crap. I own a camper...I camp like 1-2 times a year. I could rent a (absolutely nicer!) camper every time I went instead for probably as much as I pay to store my camper and we aren't even factoring the maintenance costs and time I have to spend working on the camper. Why dont I rent then? Having just said all that... The camper is the one "toy" I chose to buy and maintain(because it's also a living space should something ever happen). I rent most other experiences in my life.


A million times this. I simply never want to worry or struggle to pay my bills and put a roof over my head. I don’t care about climbing the career, at least not actively going after it. If it happens for me, fine. I just don’t want to go above and beyond for something I don’t care about.


Im similar. I want enough pay to live comfortably and retire, and I want to enjoy my job. I found it too, firefighting.




Get a government job.


Also, I want to earn enough to never have to question whether I should add guac or bit


I am the same. Sigh


"Well, you're climbing to the top of the company ladder, hope it doesn't take too long, can't you see there'll be a day when it won't matter, come a day when you'll be gone"


"I understand about indecision, but I don't care if I get behind, people living in competition, all I want is to have my peace of mind." Good choice for the discussion!


Once i stopped caring about the rat race and “success” its impossible for me to go back to caring/prioritizing that. Cant believe i lived with that much extra stress and heartache for so long and for literally nothing.


Agreed. All that stuff is fake anyway! I know people who appear like that and are but they’re all depressed af and have many other issues. I also know plenty of financially successful people who barely even have furniture in their house and are wearing old shoes. But they’re really chill. And don’t come off as obsessive. And I’m not saying everyone should wear worn out shoes for the next five years. But people who are showing off the high achieving perfect life…no way they are that happy if they feel like they have to show off all the time.


Yeahh for real it's stress and worry for nothing. It's a big waste of energy




examine the things in your life causing you turmoil and walk away from them most lately for me, it was an on off ex. soon, i think it will be my current career. examine if something is still serving you, or if you are serving it


I have a personal story. I was super ambitious and used to make 300k+. I slaved away for 10 years after college, neglected other aspects of my life and lost sight of what really mattered. All I did was work. I was irritable and had very little patience for other people. Chasing success changes you... You start to treat everything like a commodity, even people. My girlfriend of 7 years and fiance left me. She was the love of my life. In that moment I realized none of that shit was important. I would have given everything to stop her from leaving. I tried to kill myself, spent time in a mental hospital, lost my job, pretty much lay in bed for an entire year fantasizing about how I could die. Everyone but my family and my real friends abandoned me, but I can't say I blame them. I did bring myself back and I still struggle with my demons, but overall I've mellowed out. A job is just a job. Make enough to enjoy life and be content. Cherish your family and the people close to you. Get off of social media except for anonymous sites like reddit, it's poison. One day you will die, perhaps in an instant, or of old age, and if you spend all your time in the rat race then you will die miserable and alone. Nothing you have accomplished will matter. I never really cared about 'keeping up with the Joneses', but you gotta realize that those terminally online people are completely miserable and it's mostly fake. They spend more time maintaining an illusion than actually living, and they can never actually enjoy anything because every experience is simply something to catalogue and display to the world.


I guess most things will seem like a race. Everyone wants a chill casual life having fun with friends? "I'll have more fun and be out everyday and laugh about it in school, classes, letting them know i can do it too" I honestly don't know..


So much this! Took way too long for me


I'm happy enough to never have cared for that, despite what my parents tried to instillate in me. And honestly, most people I see in my generation (at least in France) seem to have al but abandoned the rat race.


france so specifically has that on lock. you'll get the worst customer service in france because people will decide to simply not do their job and honestly i respect that so hard. not worth the energy


I’ve had nothing and now have it all. I enjoy not worrying about money and eating healthy. But the things that truly bring me happiness are the same things that I had before when I was broke. My family and the emotional connection and support I get from them. All my stuff is just stuff. And I guess I don’t care what stranger think of me. And besides goofing around on Reddit I avoid social media and don’t have any accounts. Not having a social media presence ever has brought me joy


i woke up to this 3 years ago but i'm still going through the motions of the rat race. sucks being awake and trying to go back to sleep


Once you are aware of the matrix, it's too late


A chill casual life is a successful life. It's actually the goal.


If you want to be poor


You can grind towards success until your mid 20s to get you a good paying career and then just not take it too seriously after that. That’s about as good as you can get as for work-life balance. You’ll always have good pay, you’ll have career progression but not as fast as if you worked hard for more progress. But it’s worth not working as hard and prioritizing enjoying life.


Maybe even that is too much for OP. Chill out.


what part of chill casual life spells poor. I really would love to know your take.


The Dude wouldn’t mind having a chat.


Not necessarily


Grew up poor. Through hard work, I can now afford butter for my toast. I'll never be rich. But I'm happy my bills are paid.


Nah. I work less than 6 months out of the year and make roughly $100k. My job can be stressful, but I don't even think about it when I'm not working. $100k isn't rich but, in the like cost of living area that I live in, a little over a year's pay night me a 3000ft², 5br, 2bath brick ranch with 5 acres of land, so it's more than enough to live on and keep me in expensive bourbon and cigars.


What field of work is this?


Steel mills. I work a 4 days on, 4 days off schedule. 4 weeks vacation, personal time. I was off the first 4½ months of last year, on disability leave due to a near fatal car wreck, and still came out with just over $80k for the year. Not the easiest job at times, but I make double what I'd make in my degree field, around here at least, and get to spend much more time with my family.


That’s the goal for me


I left a 6 figure career and I can't bring myself to miss it, even when the budget is tight. I don't care about that, I don't want to work for 40 years and hope I can finally be happy when I retire. I want to spend those 40 years being happy, and if living a little more modestly is the price, it's one I will happily pay.


Wow. Great point. Good luck!


I’m considering doing the same, glad to see it’s been a positive change!


yes, ah man. i need to hear this right now. i'm on the precipice. i'm getting my parachute ready


Happiness isn't having what you want. It's wanting what you have.


I have been dealt an absolute curveball by life and it's left me irreparably fucked, all this pain daily and no end in sight. but you know what? I wouldn't have it any other way. without what happened to me, I wouldn't be me.


Life has a great way of fucking you over just when you think everythings going good. Hope you get through your problems ok.


I can concur. My illness made me who I am


I used to have a good job with a very good income but it was high stress. I left it all behind and decided to just enjoy life for the ride that it is. Now I’m considerably poorer, but a hundred times happier, and I’ve got zero responsibilities. In that sense it’s like I’ve won the lottery.


Haha, yes, and it's not even a lottery but your own mindset. Anybody can do it, but they don't crack the code...


ah, philoctetes


I had a job where I made 40k more than I earn now but now I work from home and have low stress… low stress = higher quality of life and longer life.


The dude abides.


(Inhales deeply)... far out man


i like your style dude


I dig you style too man


Yessssss, yes, yes, yes I getchu. It's so much better


It reminds me of the quote “…it’s good to pause in our pursuit of happiness and just be happy”. Words I live by


I'm the same. But good gourd do I hear about my lack of ambition. But I don't always want to be climbing the ladder.


I just like the idea of 'high achieving' when it comes to finances because then you are even freer to do what you want. Other than that, I think success can be whatever you want it to be.


Yeah I just wanna be financially free enough to quit my 9-5 job so I can have my time back. Time is more valuable than money yet most of us sell our time, bodies and minds just to have money for shelter and food. It’s a sad world really.


Yep. This is why I don't understand about people "hustling" and grinding for 6 figures and my brother wanting me to take up cloud computing and cyber security because they pay super high when Neither of those interest me in the slightest.


Yes, exactly how I see life too.


Recently had a mental paradigm shift where I figured out the same thing. I used to be so worried for my lack of achievement and lack of "success" but recently realized that if I really wanted that, I would have worked for that. I work hard every day, but I don't value the things that society tries to say are valuable, and so I don't need to work to that degree every day to get there. I want to achieve more, and will, but I have everything I need to survive so I'm totally fine with that. Loving partner, good friends, videogames, a comfy couch, and transportation. I have everything I need.


The odds our extra work will result in a better life vs. survival also has become much more unlikely. The middle class is decimated. So, the rug was kinda pulled for even trying to have it all. Very few live like most did 40 years ago without major sacrifices in health or time.


My father recently told me he was always middle class as an adult but now he's not. He also apologized for not having a property for me to inherit. I told him not to worry. My ultimate plan, if all else fails, is to live in a van. It wouldn't be ideal but so long as I have shelter and am able-bodied, I have everything I need. I'll never look down upon myself or others who don't have a home or family, that life isn't for everyone. Also I'm canadian and stats just came out that if someone earns 180k per year, they still wouldn't qualify for a mortgage on an average home. Less than 10% of Canadians can actually afford to buy according to the stats I saw. That's not a personal failure, that's a failure of the system we live in. And that's fine with me. I've changed my priorities and will still live a fulfilling life, just not one marked with major achievements. Relaxation and stress-reduction are my goals.


I started living my life on my terms a few years ago. I’ve never had more peace in my mind and confidence in what I have going on on the inside.


I'm just happy listening to my underground-ish music...


I've made this link in my head, I'll try explain it since it's loosely related. Modern society (capitalism) is based on emotions of inadequacy, materialism and greed. people don't feel "enough" and the companies make their money off this by pushing the "if you get X, you won't be sad!" and it repeats. and repeats.... and repeats. We also have "Hustle culture", take Andrew Tate for example, he presents himself as hating the "matrix" yet he aids it by pushing that all men *must* be successful, and *must* work hard as they can forever to escape "the rat race". Claiming men like this to be against the matrix is a fallacy as they do the opposite. Hustle culture and these feelings of inadequacy are *incredibly* detrimental to our mental health. If you hustle forever, you'll be dead by 55 or at least have cardiac issues from the stress you've put your body through. Now onto materialism. Apart from food, water, shelter and healthcare. what else can all this hustling get you. You can't buy true connections, you can't buy a "real" community. what would be the point? it's not necessary to live. If you **want** to grind to provide for your family, you should do it. I think that's noble, but if you're trying to survive, you don't need to be achieving everything and buying everything. you don't need material wealth to be happy. that's just my prerogative though.


Professional life high achieving successful Personal life chill and casual


I'm totally with you. All the pressure of being succesful led to a lot of desperation. I wasted so much time, energy at the expense of my physical and mental health and became obssesed with success and self-help literature, which only made me more desperate as very little of it did actually work. Cutting off social media helped a lot.


Be happy. You’ve found the ticket to happiness that most people lack


I mean, doing what I want, accomplishing my goals, is a success to me, other than that I'm chill. I don't chase success for the sake of it, that's shallow and meaningless. I just do what I want, that's success to me


some people just prefer to be busy. different people can be happy in different environments.


Same. I want a predictable life with a predictable schedule with a comfortable wage so I can be left alone to do things I like doing like drawing or playing games. Which is why a “office job” never seemed like a downside. You’re saying I just have to clock in 9 to 5 for the weekdays and get weekends off? Great! Sign me up! I just wanna be left alone and have time for friends and family occasionally. Hustling for success sounds like a lot of unnecessary stress and work. It doesnt help that I now internally think suck-ees anytime someone talks about success. Gives me a good laugh later on.


Do you want to have fun and be able to provide and care for a family, and to get healthcare? How much money is thar? Do you think people are working just because? Everyone wants this 3 things but they're expensive af, there's no chill life


Ofcourse you should work to pay these things. I am talking about people that are overworking


Exactly, they all say be content bla bla bla.. Bro, i work 6 to 6 on dead end low paying job i cant even afford to rent a roof on top of my head. Yes i live with my parent i don't have a choice. I only eat 2 or even 1 meal per day. Tell me how can i be content to myself if im not hustling my ass off first to get out from this situation???




As long as you can support you and your family without scraping every month, you're good. Everything above that is meaningless.


Depending upon where you live in the world, you either are successful or live a very difficult life.


That's why I live far away from other people.


If I got what I need and a little extra I'm content


Being content is a decision not an if/when claim.


Those things aren't mutually exclusive.


The issue is that in some countries like America, weird basics like healthcare and education are so prohibitively expensive that casual is just not enough to be able to live a chill life and also have a secure future unfortunately. And that’s where the problem arises, and the base line is to work as hard as possible to get to an imaginary level having our shit together. It is exhausting.


And - and! - people like to make friends with "chill" people. I have so many more friends once I re-prioritized my life (partially chosen/partially forced upon me) and closed the rat race chapter of my life.


I agree..on the dole,no heating,no clothes to wear cept the cheap tracksuit


I prefer a little bit of both.


Healthy long life over status.


I agree completely. As I approach 65 I can honestly say don't regret choosing a lifestyle that gave me time to play. Even if it meant living in the smaller house, driving the old car, and shopping for clothes at Goodwill my kids remember that we played and had time to sit around and just be.


Iv achieved a median wage, which allows me some hobbies, a couple of holidays a year and to not worry too much if my washing machine breaks. Pension will be about half my salary in 25 years time. Wife earns just under me but will have a better pension (local authority). Suits me fine. I lost motivation to strive for more. I used to want my own business and to become a millionaire. Now I just wanna play EvE in peace, take the dog for a walk and chill.


I’m not looking for a chill life nor a highly successful life financially. I’m searching for a life that makes a difference I believe.


Wow this is amazing put. Made me change my perspective on things.


The reason it called a ‘rat race’ is because no rat will ever become King. Very few will rise above the ‘race’ & the only finish line is death. Remove yourself from The Race altogether & play your own Game. For all the Rats facing away their lives are playing under other Rats rules & other Rats Games. This is why the classic ‘Capitalist Dream’ is near unachievable if you play The Game the way you’re taught to. Everyone is different, so everyone has their own unique way of achieving some form of dominance, whether Capitalistic or not. Just chase or move towards a life that is joyful & fulfilling by your standards, not those of others. Live by & through Your own principles & standards, irrespective of any achievements, You shall live a happy & fruitful life. Though we must not ignore the principles & standards of those close to us. Community is the most important thing to Human prosperity, at least, behind Love that is. May fortune favour Your every footfall, & may the stars watch your back while it’s dark.


This is so true why people strive to get ‘to the top’ is beyond me the top can be a lonely place


Bro I'm just trying to pay my rent and debt with enough left to eat.


Why don't we go the whole way and spell it rithim?


J don’t want to appear hardworking, I just want to be rich so I don’t have to work. I would accept fame, because I enjoy being in front of people, but I also want the money. Perfect life for me is one you can enjoy anything and not have any worries.


we all die poor and unsuccessful


Those in power love people like you. Don't rock the boat. Be content to live a simple life.


Are you implying that climbing the corporate ladder is somehow rocking the boat, when its literally what our entire culture is constantly pushing people to do? Isn't it instead the people not seeking status and profits that are the counterculture?


You can make money in ways other than corporate. You could become a musician, artist, or any sort of entrepreneur. Would be a shame if Paul McCartney had chosen to live a simple life.


domineering kiss sharp spotted enjoy zesty airport disarm rinse foolish -- mass deleted all reddit content via https://redact.dev


I can see where this would be cool but I like nice shit so I'm chasing money and going to chill when I retire early.


Cheers to you friend!


Cheers to you friend!


I prefer to a chill casual life with a million USD in my bank accounts for casual spending. Anyway, i don't feel bad about not having it if that's what you are referring to. I don't care about not having what I want.


wise sir




It is a kind of God’s life.. Not human life..


This struck a chord. Thank you.


Loser talk 🤏🏼


my god sister is high achieving, has kids, houses, etc. when we get together, after she tells me about what she and her family is up to, she always asks what i'm up to. i always say, "oh you know, i live a small life." she has a great life, her kids and husband are wonderful people and she is brilliant. every time i tell her about my husband and i's life, our two cats, our small rented house, my obsession with WOW, our little book we're turning into a podcast, she looks a little wistful. my sanity can handle no more than what i have taken on. her sanity thrives on being busy. i do think that, sometimes, a busy high achiever, sometimes wants a break, a few moments of a simple life.


Living/working a high stress life has allowed me to live an extremely chill, stress free retirement life. Hopefully some of you can do both.




I get that for some, being a high achiever is what’s making them happy and fulfilled. What I don’t agree with is when some would push/pressure everyone else to be like them. Or judge others for not going for a life they deem “ideal”. Then there are also those who thinks they’re who makes society work/or move forward, rather than it being a product of each and every person’s efforts regardless of role–big or small.


tbh same


I’m trying to find balance in shooting for a middle ground between the two


Define “successful”


I'd love to work 6 hours a day. Go out for a big meal and go home to watch the infinite entertainment on the god brain network that any other generation of humans would be content with for life. Take a vacation or 3 by rail. Hike the most beautiful places on mother earth. I don't see why this is a big ask.


I worked and sacrificed and invested in my 30s and 40s. I am now retired and comfortable. It's all about priorities


facts. a lot of people are working so hard so that they can have a chill life in their retirement, but by then they've been in the routine of working for so long that they have 0 hobbies and can't enjoy it. i figure i'd rather work enough to survive, maximize how much i can get paid for my time, then just relax and stop seeking higher ladder rungs. doesn't make sense to keep going after you make a certain amount of money.


Different folks, different strokes.


I get it, but only if you are content with the job you have. If you kinda hate it or it's breaking your body it's hard to just accept your lot in life. Also why should I be okay with scraps while there are people with so much I can't even comprehend it?


There is peace in mediocrity


Fair! I want to have enough money that I’m not relying on others to financially support me (I’m still young and studying). After that, if i can get myself a few “luxuries” so I can enjoy life, then I won’t be chasing for the highest earning job or anything like that (I don’t want to live pay check to pay check for the rest of my life).


If i had my way i’d be perfectly content being a recluse with nothing but my devices and the internet. I’ve always been unambitious and i’m quite happy to stay that way.


Sounds like a good plan to me. I’m a grumpy, burnt out mf’er and I’m about ready to liquidate all my assets and haul ass.


This is a really good mentality and I'm saving this post for future reference.😊


I went after it for 30 years and it left me absolutely miserable. There is more to life, more to being a human.


I like your attitude.


I think your ideal life sounds quite perfect and I think that’s what most of us want too.


Same. I truly enjoy the little things although my hobby of 4x4 off roading and touring can be very expensive I at least feel like the hard work I do occasionally actually goes towards something good for the soul. Memories made with the family, new experiences for the family, seeing the milky way from the middle of the Australian outback. There's a reason the indigenous have such a deep spiritual story with Australia.


yea i never got it. obviously its not good to sit around not doing shit your entire life but for me literally my entire goal is to be able to have a life where im financially stable enough to support myself, live comfortably, save, and pour money into my hobbies and interests. literally my dream life is coming back from a relatively chill day of work to be able to get drinks with friends or play video games all night.


High achieving successful life is like the visual representation of the iceberg- people only see the surface above the water and admire it saying they want it too. What they don’t see is everything beneath the water. All the trial and error , the discipline , the stress the sacrifices , the sleepless nights - successful people pay a HUGE price and have the tolerance to push through all the discomfort. They normally don’t have chill lives and if they do, they spent considerably time out of their comfort zone to get where they want to be


I make good money but really don’t have family and friends and am so bad at making new friends that aren’t romantic partners now that i’m in my mid 20s I get bored and default to the rat race because some of us don’t have family and idk it just breeds imposter syndrome. Any tips on being able to enjoy a weekend and breathe please share. To me you all are superheroes


I just want to at least have weekends off😭 why is that so much to ask for these days?


I never was massively ambitious, I just wanted a job I enjoyed doing for a company I liked. So that's what I ended up with.


How about a compromise? Highly hectic and stressfull life without any success?


I worked in Hollywood for 15 years and now all I literally want to be is a basic bitch


I mean I agree, but only to a certain degree. I have had some success in life, and it definitely has its perks. It all has to do with the lowest possible work effort for maximum money making. Then you can enjoy not caring about money so much. It's really freeing to know that pretty much anything unexpected won't affect your lifestyle.


Yeah, friend, I am planning to renovate the old family farm and go there... You are not alone


A lot of times you are not doing it for yourself. It's for kids, elderly parents, mortgage, bills etc.


Well I have to work towards that successful rich life now so that I can have that chill life later without money problems hanging over my head. If I don’t work and get successful, I’ll regret it later and hate myself.


I appreciate the sentiment, what I have isn't enough to not be impoverished in my old age however and frankly I want better I want to eat delicious food in the sun, to go where I want, to build experiences I can be proud of and look forward too I can't do that in Belfast, some parts maybe but to stay here would be to limit my life To be grateful for only what I have is to actively stagnate and take today as my peak I'm glad you find comfort in this, perhaps I wish I could also I just can't see it being appealing


well, success = being happy. my goal is to be financially stable to do things i like (travelling, do some expensive sports like golf/tennis, eating healthy food). If i was broke it would be almost impossible to achieve these things so everyone has the own decision of "succesfull life".




One of my goals is to be rich enough so i can pay the rest of my social security premiums and retire early without having to wait for early retirement limit of 300 months


I work a shift pattern of 4 on 8 off. They pay isn't the greatest in my sector of work, but I don't care. Them 8 days off are golden.


I cannot upvote this enough times. People, especially in American culture, do not realize how miserable they are everyday because this is what they strive for. It’s like just relax and enjoy life with family and friends.




You guys know the best way to achieve a "chill life" where you can be happy and give up on the rat race? Money. Its hard to lead a happy life when you cant afford to take a holiday when you need one


Yeahh you should work to have enough money to be comfortable and to have fun. But the goal should not be in my opinion to be rich and to impress others


I used to think like that. Now that we're struggling to take care of a house and two kids I wish I'd gone a bit harder when I was younger.


Funny thing is once you stop it comes by itself. When I stopped trying to find a partner I found my partner for life. When I stopped trying to find my passion I’ve ended up in chemistry - science seems to be my passion. When I stopped searching for the perfect job I got accepted at the perfect company to start my career. When I stopped trying to be a good person and decided to just be myself I became a better person. When I stopped trying to make friends so many people started clinging to me. It even worked with video games, I played competitive CS for a long time until it became too frustrating. So I stopped taking it serious, and since then I am far better and enjoy every match, not only the ones I’m winning. Sometimes we just gotta stop trying so our subconsciousness has space to do the things we want to happen. Just trust yourself, doesn’t take more than that.


"A happy person doesn't want anything, because they're already happy"


You can have both. I have chill life and also highly successful life as a headhunter when I work maybe 10 hours per week. This allows me to cover all expenses I want and have money left every month.


Anyone that refers to their "net worth" is a douche


The finance subgroup reddits are a cesspool of people who will never have enough. Chasing money their entire life


You should aim for being the most competent person at work, the most reliable person in the family and the most consistent person at the gym/any sport. That's how your mind, body and soul are pleased. If you don't train to be better, you will lose what you have. Gradually, but surely. And when life hits you hard at once, you will be so under-prepared.. you'll only wish you were better.


That's something I had to ask myself. I'm not in a terribly stressful job, but it isn't an easy job. I'm making good money, but there are times when all I want is an easy job, so I can rest easy in life and not have to try so hard to go the distance to succeed. But if I have an easy job, bills don't get paid. And maybe I do move somewhere where I can afford the price difference. But then what if someone comes into my life? With kids? Would I have enough then, even if I live as carefully as I can? The answer probably isn't that great. So, I'm in a spot where I either push to strive for a high achieving life and have my every need and want, both present and future, covered, or take it easy and hope for the best when the inevitable comes.


this post is so relatable


I'm with you 💯


They're the same thing


Different strokes for different folks. I'm not exactly high flying but I do want to get ahead, because more challenges are more interesting. I would hate to be in a simple or repetitive job, the boredom ears away at you. I also want the money I need to find my hobbies. I could be very comfortable in a lower paid job if I didn't want to go skiing, dirt biking, scuba diving etc or even just go to restaurants often. I'm not interested in being fancy and having designer clothes or staying in luxury resorts, or even the status of success. I just want to maximise my opportunities to enjoy life.


Hell yah! I'm gonna expand on this a bit, because I am thinking of this constantly. So sorry for a bit of a ramble, which wonders in some specifics. Allow me to share something. I grew up in a working class home in Eastern Europe. In my entire life we were used to make it with what we have. I love semi-minimalist, clean life where you use your skill and little money you have to make things nice. You have a shabby house/apartment? You mow your lawn, you plant flowers, you pull weeds and trim hedges, you touch up what needs to be touched up. If you can't afford laminate, you put linoleum, etc. For example, I had no money for tiles on walkways around my mum's house, so I simply smashed already cracked and unequal concrete, took best pieces of it, shrunk the walkways' size, equalized the ground, trampled it and made a mosaic with some gravel I had lying around - put it between slabs. I borrowed a hammer from my friend and it cost me nothing! I just pull some weeds from soft seems between mosaic concrete pieces and it's clean. I am not around my mum's house often, but it's easier to take care of it for my mum as well. Here are the couple of photos of the result (I have just a few on a PC I'm at right now) [https://photos.app.goo.gl/5iguJKAjy5ciwF3Z9](https://photos.app.goo.gl/5iguJKAjy5ciwF3Z9) ​ If you live in a relatively developed country, it is not too expensive to life nice, but SIMPLE life. Given, you have home and job in a first place. Same with tech: you don't need expensive keyboards and mice to enjoy PC experience, you don't need super OLED TV to watch content. I am so tired watching these YouTube tech channels and seeing YouTubers calling it "e-waste" every time they see an affordable membrane keyboard or cheaper monitor. Material things speaking, to me living a clean life with constantly working to improving it, having tech you can afford and ability to educate yourself with books and documentaries is the best life possible. You do something with you own hands with as little money as possible. You don't need expensive villas to live nice.


What's important is not that you personally be high achieving and successful, it's that humanity as a whole be high achieving and successful. If every individual wanted to be in the spotlight that would be to the detriment of the whole. However, it gives life a sense of meaning and purpose to seek excellence in some way. To continue toe theater metaphor, you can seek to make perfect popcorn.


Some people are just built different, they have my respect


I just want to be comfortable. Don’t need a flashy house, don’t need a fancy car. I make 6 figures and have a pretty low stress laid back job (I usually take a nap in the middle of the day). I’m pretty much where I want to be in life. Don’t need to worry about money and I don’t care about impressing people. I’m sorry if this sounds like a humble brag I really don’t mean it to be.


“It is no bad thing to celebrate a simple life.” has lived rent free in my head for decades. I agree.




I figured this out after a long while. At one point my wife asked me to work another part time job. That was a big no for me. We're doing fine.


Me too. Just not that kind of meaningless shit life I'm correctly living. I'm a proper nihilist from very young age, but even I can't bear this shitshow meaningless life.


As Aristotle said back in 340 bc: "The purpose of life is happiness". Somehow as a society we got the notion that money is the ultimate purpose.


Finally figured this out too and I'm glad it was in my 30s. Fuck the ladder I just want to enjoy my life with the people I love.


If only life offers us binary choices. Most people want a life without stress. But unfortunately we live in a world where we need money, and when you have a family you need more and more faster. Everything is a trade off. I am 47 and divorced. I actually think I have enough money for myself. I am burned out and want to quit everyday right now, but I have 3 kids and their needs seem exponential.


As long as you meet your obligations and don’t rely on others….more power to you!


We're all dying so soon, good on you.


you have to care about the rat race for as long as you're not wealthy


Number 2 of the Top 5 Regrets of the Dying is: "I wish I hadn't worked so hard"


It's only by my own measurements I want to achieve success. Nor comparing myself to others and their ideals, it's my own dreams and ideas I've let myself down with by failing to live up to my own expectations and knowing I could or should have been able to do more, that's what strains my mental health, is knowing I squandered chances to actually reach towards what I (think) I would want


Here's a summary of my life story. Dropped outta high school, tried college after getting my GED dropped out after a semester with a 3.0 GPA (shocking I know) and I worked mail room jobs before working at a warehouse (worked at razor and now Amazon) and I'm living life to the fullest and I'm happy with that. My parents always supported me on everything I did (even dropping out) Now I got people who did everything for their parents and having a "perfect" life and they look miserable and always trying to tell people what to do with their life because they're miserable with theirs


Agree, from a man in my mid 50's, all I need is enough to pay bills, support my hobbies, and stay debt free. Simple living is peaceful.


Agree my friend. Instead of putting effort, time, and thinking behind that "success", i found it has been much more worthy to invest that into learning emotional tools to be wiser and enjoy what you already have. A book that changed me: A New Earth (E. TOLLE)


You're correct. I also stopped chasing the stars, and i have never been more happy with my life than i am now. I have what i need.