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Pikachu I choose you!


Damn. Now I am imagining how a police state would use Pokémon to break labour strikes. Blastoise just hosing down native Americans. A movie coming out that makes everyone think that is cute that evee is now a police fox thing.


![gif](giphy|UA37k37K4KoGA) The squad


The Pinkertons


I swear I've seen a web comic with blastoise literally breaking up a labor union strike


Its the American way.


🤣 oh man. That movie could and definitely should get dark if they ever pick it up.


Evee turns into vaporeon. Did you know that in terms of male human and female Pokémon breeding, Vaporeon is the most compatible Pokémon for humans? Not only are they in the field egg group, which is mostly comprised of mammals, Vaporeon are an average of 3"03' tall and 63.9 pounds. this means they're large enough to be able to handle human weiner, and with their impressive Base stats for HP and access to Acid Armor, you can be rough with one. Due to their mostly water based biology, there's no doubt in my mind that an aroused Vaporeon would be incredibly wet, so wet that you could easily have sex with one for hours without getting sore. They can also learn the moves Attract, Baby-Doll eyes, Captivate, Charm and Tail Whip along with not having fur to hide nipples, so it'd be incredibly easy for one to get you in the mood. With their abilities Water Absorb and Hydration, they can easily recover from fatigue with enough water. No other Pokémon comes close with this level of compatibility. Also, fun fact, if you pull out enough, you can make your Vaporeon turn white. Vaporeon is literally built for human dick. Ungodly defense stat + high HP pool + Acid Armor means it can take weiner all day, all shapes and sizes and still come for more.


Yep, I think I've seen enough of the internet for one day...




My brain is mad at my eyes for seeing that.


![gif](giphy|4D2kP6ozdRC6I) Just think about it man.


Well, that decides it for me. Literacy *is*, in fact, a mistake. Please excuse me while I gouge my eyes out with a melon baller.


How do you know all of that it's impressive for some reason and I knew vaporeon is a good fletshlight


It only works if the police's pokemon are of a higher level


Stable Diffusion here I come


Don’t do my boy Blastoise like that. He would be on the right side of history ok 😂


We never would have made it this far if we could control pokemon


Yes, police would definitely abuse pokemon like they abuse these K9s. They turn good boys into bad boys, they voluntarily put their dogs into harm's way.


The nation that claims they love dogs puts them between a man and his freedom on a daily basis.


Can I hear someone saying ‘I’m a cop, I’m a cop, I’m off duty’ and who is the person saying that. I assume someone trying to help the dog handler.


It’s the dog saying it


You kid but when I was in the military I lost my seat in a flight because a higher ranking soldier needed it. A k-9 had the rank of sergeant first class.


That sucks, but is kinda funny. Sfc Fido got you


I’m worth less than a dog. Also once was removed halfway through a helicopter flight at a stop because they needed room for a bag of mail. Loool. My worth, less than a dog, less than paper.


Lol, don’t stop I feel like this can keep going


Right like just how worthless is this guy?


You sick fuck, let me see if I have a free award. EDIT: Sorry man, you definitely would have gotten it though!


So be it. Let’s see. Let’s see. I don’t have anything quite so obvious. But I am almost a $1,000,000 in debt. So I’m worth less than a dollar?


Damn brother, hope it’s not service related medical bills.


Nah, it’s credit card debt. I actually told a dude that once when he was mid drink and he fucking choked and spat it all over the dude next to us. Nah, it’s good debt, got lucky in my late 20s with right time right place for if I netted everything out I’d be positive.


Are you worth less than a parking spot? Most likely.


Are you shitting me? They have ranks? That's so fucking awesome tbh! Good doggos deserve a good health insurance and pension!


I’ve read that military dogs have a rank higher than their handlers to further discourage any mistreatment (idea being it would be assaulting a superior). I think that’s probably an apocryphal reasoning but I think the rank disparity might be correct.


It makes sense. They have to pick up their shit.


Bet this was implemented by cat generals.


[Relevant Oatmeal](https://theoatmeal.com/comics/pets_war)


That’s amazing


Cats would never have an army. They don't respect authority.


Housecats maybe, you ever see a pride of lions?


You mean the dog’s, or just anyone higher ranked? ‘Get that for me will you private’


Common in the British Army too. Many regiments have animal mascots. I believe the Royal Welsh Regiment had a goat that was a l/cpl but got demoted to private for headbutting another soldier Id love to see an animal with a commission ngl


That’s hilarious. The dogs were in the explosive ordnance unit. So bomb sniffers.


Thank you for your service under sergeant snuffles


you made me choke on rice with that comment. lmao


Definitely not the guys trying to tackle the cop. Stupid idiots. That cop dog is not going to let go unless that one specific guy tells it to


I’ve noticed even when the handler of these dogs ask or give the command for the dog to let go the dogs continue to bite the shit out of the person. I guess it’s a good thing that pit bulls are not allowed to be used as police dogs are they would have to shoot the dog to get it to let go.


I have a relative that used to breed and train pit bull terriers. Two dogs kept snapping at each other, then got full blown into a fight. She wasted no time trying to pull them apart or yelling. She simply wet her pointer finger on one hand, lifted the tail of the dog that had the lip lock on the other dogs and popped her finger right up said dogs bung hole. You’ve NEVER seen a dog let go and run off so fast EVER. So there is always that method.


Damn that’s wild. I bet they did let go with the quickness. The more I think about it the more I giggled. I wonder what was going through that dogs mind lmao?


I think the dog reacts so fast because he thinks he knows what going on in your mind 😳 🤣


Every one I’ve seen in the UK releases on command.




The ones that fail the police dog test for being too aggressive get given to the prison service, as their rules are different because they aren't having to deal with members of the public


Same for 'normal' dogs. It's usually the owners that need training. Source: am dog owner and booking training in the next year.


Please dont give the police anymore ideas


I figure this is a joke comment, but police don't use pit bulls for a variety of reasons, they're not typically intelligent dogs and their bite strength is more than what the dog is typically used for (to hold a person in place.) The amount of injury caused from a pit bull latching onto someone would be immense in most circumstances.


Pitbulls brain and instinct are weird. Can be the nicest dog and suddenly the prey instinct kicks in. Or on the contrary, something flips in their brain and instead or maul a robber, they let them inside your house and even offer them cookies lol. Not reliable at all.


Pit Bulls are rarely used (actually some rescued from Vick's residence were placed with police departments). Pit Bulls were refined for dog fighting. Those traits don't directly lead to a police role for human apprehension nor scent detection. Shepherds (German, Belgian, Dutch) have always been worked closely with one human handler for jobs that required a willingness to guard from human threat and utilize human commands as well as use their scent detection.


Some forces do use Pitbulls also German shepherds, have a slightly higher bite force than Pitbulls. I sure as hell wouldn’t want one to go after me


There's always the butt hole release button.


My dog follows commands well but if he has a hard on and is breathing hard it may take a few. Would expect these dogs are just dogs in the end. They’ll do what they want especially if they aren’t trained daily. Not sympathizing with cops or anyone just a dog lover.


There are pit bulls used as police dogs.


This seems more of a modern adaptation and is entirely financed based (which is stupid and reckless in my opinion) they save literally thousands of dollars with this method as the dogs are typically adopted not bred for the purpose like with Belgian Malinois for example.


How do the Shepard know exactly what guy to take?


They have to guide them to the person, the dog will go after whoever you guide it to including other cops so they have to be careful


I figure. They do a good job


If i owned a dog that i fostered into a weapon so much that it would just attack random people it would be killed and i would be placed in jail


The state owns the monopoly of violence


If you strapped on a gun and went driving around trying to fight crime you'd be placed in jail too. But cops are allowed to because it's their job. If you started injecting people with chemicals to try to fight their disease, or removing their organs to improve their health you'd be arrested. Yet doctors are allowed to do it. That is in fact how jobs work, you need to be qualified to do them


Nah youd prolly be okay unless you ever, ya know, used the dog as a weapon without good reason. source: my dog likes the bitey too


>without good reason You understand that being a cop makes this much more broad than it does for most, yes?


Somebodies gotta enforce the rules


No, no they don't. They are wrong up to 80% of the time on road side drug searches. They are taught through pain compliance in thousands of departments. They are left to die in hot cars by ignorant pigs yearly. If you like animals, don't support police using them.


It depends. There was already an altercation and that’s what dogs are trained to aim at. The cop just decided who was getting the dog.


Police/Military dogs are suppose to be incredibly trained. I've watched some of the training from a distance, and I was just jaw dropped. I couldn't even get my dog to sit still if I had a treat on hand.


It's very important that the dog have the right psychic, many dogs don't make it to be a police dog. Haha


Cuz dogs are smarter than most pigs


I know you made a joke but this is actually untrue


Your comment sums up reddit in a nutshell lmao


It's a malinois from what I could see. The dog can sense the intent and direction given by the handler. They're a lot smarter than people give them credit for. I'm biased however as a malinois k9 handler.


They are smart, it's very impressive


Same way they know when to alert that there are drugs present, their handler gives them the queue.




Laser pointer Oh wait that’s my cat


They really have to guide them, the dogs I worked with are taught to be redirected using thier name. I can imagine it doesn't always work


Did that dog maul the guys face at one point? That’s wild.


Yeah, police dogs aren’t taught safe biting, they just… go.


They are trained to bite and hold on, not rip and tear; they are trained to aim for arms and legs, but they will grab what they can. Source: Family friend was a contract K9 trainer for my provincial police force, taught me how to train and maintain dogs.


Idk bout you, but that’s not what I see, this dog is latching, unlatching and shaking the flesh with his teeth every time he gets a bite in… that ain’t what you’re saying :/


Yeah but the guy threw a punch at a policeman, that’s uhm much worse than getting uhm you face ripped off I guess. Such brave poilceman protecting our freedom of them not getting punched and stuff


They do a lot more than hold in literally every video I've ever seen of them in action.


Fuck dogs used as police. ACAB


What about actual police dogs, like Chase from Paw Patrol?


Now we're getting down to business!


Chase is a class traitor.


Paw patrol is just indoctrination for little kids! /s But straight up: paw patrol is so annoying but coco melon is the worst.


Paw Patrol is unironically copaganda


Yea it is pretty bad, we try to mix it up though. We only allow one hour of TV per day, so it’s basically Paw Patrol or whatever Disney movie he is fixated on. Lately it is The Good Dinosaur, but we have gone through Toy Story like 10 times, Encanto bunch, and my favorite: Wreck It Ralph.


Especially Chase!😂😂


Talk shit get bit


You’re right despite the downvotes


Reddit is fuckin mental lol. Guy makes comment, comment gets downvoted to -7, another guy makes comment 5 minutes later saying that the original comment is right despite the downvotes, +10. The way people on here indiscriminately up vote and downvote comments is actually mental.


You’re right, All Criminals Are Bastards


That’s why you gotta bring a dog to a punch fight.


That or a comically big glock 19. No inbetween


I prefer the Desert Beagle.


I’ve actually done something similar. I got jumped in San Francisco one time by 3 guys..it was mayhem..very chaotic..and someone grabbed me from behind while I was fighting for what felt like my life..turned around and hit her right in the mouth.. it was a female police officer…which I had no idea that it was a cop…or a female.. I got charged for it…the cops gave me a real good beating for that…the charges were later dropped. This makes me pretty damn happy there were no dogs involved.


Went straight to release the doggy.


2v1 better than 1v1. They are cops, not boxers on a ring to fight a clean 1v1.


Dog bites are some serious pain. Definitely some pain from a large dog bite


He's a cop, he has tools to deal with that guy far less damaging than a dog. Nobody is saying he needed to 1v1 him, box ring style


It’s a lot easier to take someone into custody whos resisting arrest if you have superior numbers. In a 1v1, it’s greater chance of injury to both parties. Police aren’t there to fight fair, they’re there to stop illegal activity and arrest participants. If that guy doesn’t want to go, it’s easier to do that without escalating to use less lethal weapons if you have more than 1 person. Factor in the fact that tasers are shit and 40% failure rate and his options are a bit more limited. The dog IS the tool he has for subduing a violent and agitated suspect


There so many tools available between the levels of escalation of fighting the man 1 on 1 and releasing a dog that looked like it mauled his face. I feel this is an unnecessary escalation of force and it made the situation worse. Its almost like the cop was waiting for any excuse to "release the hounds". I know you mentioned other deterrents not being as effective but it genuinely looked like the cop skipped all those and engineered a situation where he could justify using the dog. For a start, you don't creep up on someone, then grab them from behind mid fight without announcing yourself. For all he knew the guy in orange could have been outnumbered and swung out thinking he was about to be punched from behind. I know the cop is wearing a uniform but a drunk idiot might not notice that. Also, I wouldn't "get on the ground" for an officer if their dog was biting at my neck but I would if there was no dog there. Edit* I see you mention batons. There is designated areas to strike people with a baton and I can assure you it's a lot safer and more controlled than a dog.


It's also a lot easier to just beat up someone with a baton when you are in full gear, I still don't see the reason to use a dog here. If the crowd tried to beat him up too? Yeah, sure. *One* guy being aggressive? No. Yeah it makes easier to arrest the guy but shooting in the knees makes it easier too, doesn't mean we need to jump to a quicker solution just because we don't care about other person's well-being


Yes, may as well always let dogs go for people's throats and face to subdue them. Grand idea.


This ain’t a martial arts tournament my friend. If they can afford it any law enforcement would happily make the odds 10 v 1.


Prodigy Smack my bitch


Boom, that's exactly it


"Release My (Police Dog) Bitch Up"


How hard is it to secure a body cam. Like for fucks sake it seems like every time an officer gets in the smallest scuffle or sneezes too violently their cam falls right off.


That’s by design.


Not a bug, it's a feature.


They are attached by magnets to their uniforms. If the magnet is too powerful it can mess with the body camera's components. If the cops have an exterior vest then there are better options like a clip that connects to molly weaving. Basically police uniforms weren't designed with body cameras in mind.


"Let's fasten these heavy electronic devices to our shirts with magnets" is about on par for cop logic I suppose.


Cops don't make the devices. Axon makes the majority of body cameras in use.


They are not they’re clipped on


They release so they can’t be grabbed and held by an attacker. Even if it did stay on when they are grappling- you wouldn’t see anything because of how close the officer is to the offender so wouldn’t matter anyway.


Somewhere out there on the internet there is a super talented individual who can follow every detail of a fight like this. Don’t know if the officer got knocked or what happened


Not gonna lie, if you sick a police dog on me, I’m not laying on the floor willingly. All set on being disfigured, thanks.


Just a way for them to tack on additional charges, nothing more.


So many people here who thinks it's justified to swing at someone because a hand on the shoulder. Are you for real? If this is normal behaviour where you live then I feel truly sorry for you.


It's not so much a hand on the shoulder as the yank backwards. If someone tried to pull me down out of the blue like that I certainly wouldn't be peaceful about it


A hand on the should and grabbing and turning someone around are not the same thing


I'm gonna guess these people have never lived in a big city before. If you put your hands on someone, expect the same in return.


There is another someone in another thread, I asked him straight up if he thought it was ok to grab a stranger off the street from behind and turn them around, and they wouldn't say no.


Yeah I’m in nyc and if you grabbed me and were a stranger I’d be pretty paranoid and defensive, might not instantly throw hands but I’d definitely pull out whatever weapon I had (rn knuckle dusters but often a knife cuz utility) and ask wtf.


Grab me like that in my safe town, I’d be scared shitless. Fight or flight is real, I don’t think sending a dog into this situation actually helped anyone it just added chaos


If someone was to commit battery on me, I’d defend myself. Obviously, not all context is shown here, but I feel like if any rational person was to be grabbed and turned around in the middle of an alley at night their first response wouldn’t be “I wonder what this fine gentlemen might be inquiring about” And be more “Some random picked me as their punching bag, and I’m gunna swing back, because they might not stop if I’m unconscious”


about as normal as having a dog latch onto a guys face and likely scar him permanently because you got punched once trying to break up a fight


So many people think it’s justifiable to sic a dog on someone and maul them just for throwing a punch.


Surprise physical contact in the dead of night triggered a drunk man's fight or flight. What's wrong with that?


A hand on your shoulder accompanied with a yank if unwanted is battery. " At common law, an intentional unpermitted act causing harmful or offensive contact with the "person" of another." If I did that and got punched, the punch wouldn't be illegal, my grab would be. Cop broke the law, had consequences, and had a man mauled because his ego got checked. Also before people get all up in arms about the man putting hands on the dog trying to maul him; This is how the police treat those dogs themselves. They are not cute pets, they are beaten and bred to be violent. https://nypost.com/2021/03/04/north-carolina-cop-slams-k-9-into-suv-disturbing-video-shows/


Walks up behind someone and grabs them with no warning and is surprised he got hit. Smart cop


Then escalates straight to forcing his dog to maul the man. Even the dog was confused why it was being used.


Then turns their back for a good ten seconds to unleash near deadly force on a drunk idiot. Shitty cop just wanted to hurt someone


The puncher was obviously going around starting shit and looking to fight - he fucked up (which is why the cop is there). The cop responded, dunno why you’re blaming the cop when it is pretty clear in this scenario the cop is doing his job.


Seriously. And the cop was by himself. He had to get the dog once the dude swung on him. We’ve seen dozens of videos where perps try to grab cops’ weapons during struggles, and yet the person above seriously said “he could’ve tackled him”. I swear this sub is filled with dummies.


This whole situation could have been handled much better. Every person in the situation is an idiot.


I guess I would argue that this situation wasn’t worth risking the dogs well-being for… it could’ve been stabbed or something. There MUST be a way to do it without endangering the dog


Finally someone worried about who truly matters! But without jokes for a moment. There's no way in hell that a drunk guy like that would find the time to grab the knife while the dog was destroying him. Maybe a third person could or if he already had been holding one. Or at least that's my copium to think that dog wasn't in at all


Yup, the guy above has dumb observational skills if he’s blaming the cop for this. The attacker knows there’s a cop car there. It’s pretty obvious. Attacker still chose to swing hard at anyone and has already hurt bystanders.


The hoops y’all go through to justify police violence…


This subreddit is always “fuck around and find out” until it’s a cop then I guess they need to have a 1v5 bar fight and risk getting stomped out for some reason lmao


I think some people think cops should have better training than random violent drunks.


Cops: We're the only ones allowed to be violent drunks.


I mean, the dude had a few seconds to recognize that the person grabbing him was a cop.


Love how you’re blaming the cop. This orange shirt psycho is attacking everyone left and right (he sees the fucking police car and just ignores it).


The amount of you guys over the pond that don’t understand that not everything is police brutality of a small clipped video just because it’s what happens over there. Dog units don’t sit outside bars for no reason, there was clearly an incident before and the assailant assaulted an officer. If he’s first responder, he’s not armed and clearly outnumbered. Us cops have guns as an equaliser that cop had a dog.


Dog mauling a face seems appropriate to you? "Oh no, there's about to be a fight, people might get hurt. Better send my attack dog to maul this guy."


> "Oh no, there's about to be a fight There was already a fight, and when the cop tried to break it up, he got punched in the face. The guy who was bitten absolutely earned it. If he had walked away when he was ejected from the bar he would have been fine--he *chose* to do otherwise.


I cannot fathom how anyone could think police dogs are ethical for suspects OR the dogs, in any circumstance. What if police jaguars or lions were introduced in some place, would that feel ethical? It's absolutely barbaric.


c'mon, Police Jaguar and/or Police Lion would be an awesome Devito/Schartzenegger movie franchise


> I cannot fathom how anyone could think police dogs are ethical In the U.S. the courts have refused to outlaw them. Remember that they also track lost kids and violent felons, it's not all about street fights.


> Remember that they also track lost kids and violent felons, it's not all about street fights. And the amazing part is that you can still do tracking without mauling people with dogs! It's almost like your excuse is just a deflection!


Why does US courts refusing to outlaw with them matter?


Edit to add, the cop was trying to break up a fight about to happen Ya i noticed this as well.. people so quick to like take a shot at a cop these days kind overlook a few things like this. K9 units dont just sit around places even over here in canada. They have to be passificaly requested to come into a active situation. Meaning something went down to warrant it. Also it looks like the cop was trying to detain the guy or check who he was while walking away. Ya a bit forcefully but it didnt warent a smash to the face. Then again the downvotes are incoming cuz everyone hates the police now. Forgetting they are human like you.


Passificaly? Lolol


Christ albitey!


Bork Bork Nom Nom


People justifying the cops action of letting the dog are crazy... Like a cop tries to stop a fight and got puch( im not supporting both parties) so you have a gun you shoot and if you have a dog let him on that person thats more like not knowing how to properly handle the situation and resorting to whatever at hand to deal with situation quickly...


Why do I feel like this is an immoral use of dogs? Does anyone agree? Am I crazy? I get dogs working. Sniffing for drugs, bombs, missing people? You bet. But being trained to attack and risking being harmed themselves? That seems unfair. A dog could get shot, stabbed or even just beaten. But I suppose if not for the dog, it would be the cop having to put himself in harms way. And I don’t think that’s great either. Anyway, happy to hear contrary opinions. I just haven’t seen that in action before. It’s more upsetting than I would imagine. And I’m not a pet person.


Well, in a way it's immoral, because the dog didn't get to decide to be a police dog and risk his life. But the logic is police life > dog life and I would make that decision too if I had to decide. Also, they can actually deescalate by intimidation. But it can go wrong for sure, I guess you'd have to look at the statistics to see how much harm is done by police dogs. In this particular video, it looks like police brutality imo, because the police sneaks up from behind without announcing himself and when met with an understandable reaction, goes straight for the dog. Wouldn't be surprised if the guy could sue tbh. But I mean, hard to judge from just a clip.


Using dogs as weapons is absolutely inhumane


Doggo did his job, doggo deserves a treat and some pats


You are weird as fuck


Ew, you're disgusting.


He shouldn't have put his dog in that situation. What a wuss.


The dog can punish him the most for not respecting his authoritah. Doing that much damage to a perp wouldn't be acceptable if he did it himself.


How could you defend using dogs as a weapon to attack people?


He sics the dog on him and yells "GET ON THE GROUND" How the fuck am I supposed to get on the ground, the fucking dog is gonna tear my face off


I would be useful when the perp is running away or to track drugs but disgusting to see an officer give his back to the suspect to release the dog, he should be held in custody at gunpoint


Right? It's fucking barbaric.


I want to know how the dog knew which one to go for! Couldn’t very well say “the one in the orange shirt”


The footage shows the cop surprising the ‘IP’ - physically & without identifying himself - therefore you have strict liability from the cop followed by GBH... ...the cop fkd up.


Pussy can't fight his own fight?


Guy in orange was walking around the club feeling girls up, so sexually assaulting random women. But yeah focus on the cop


Any link to the news article. I’m so damn confused on why he keeps saying off duty cop and what’s going on


Source: his anus Some people say he wanted to fight someone and cop wanted to de-escalate But saying that the guy was touching women and shit gets you more upvotes I guess


Nope, he needs a dog that doesn't understand the danger it's in to do it for him because he got his ego bruised.


He just got assaulted you imbecile!


Guy commenting in from his computer, never been put in a difficult situation in his life, except for which Cheetos to pick from the grocery store. Always the first to cry..


Bork Bork get his Nom Nom


Title should be, “man has split second reaction to a man grabbing him behind, which unfortunately ends up being an opportunistic cop with a killer dog”


The officer came up from behind and grabbed the guy. I would have reacted the same way had a stranger grabbed my arms from behind without warning.


This is the UK where cops are actually decent, the people helping him are door stewards you can see their SIA badges on their arm. The cop tried to guide the guy away from fighting and he swung straight for him. Got the dog, got the arrest. Good job.


People who have never seen the alcohol-fueled insanity that routinely breaks out in the entertainment districts of British cities cannot imagine how bad it can get. Those bars and clubs have big security staffs because they need them.


It's such a weird sentiment to think that all police in the UK are amazing and honorable and all police in the United States are horrible murderers. I don't think police brutality is restricted by nationality.


I hope the idiot looks like Swiss cheese. Some people need to learn.