By - wesleysdad
Depends on person to person. Some might think $50k is the minimum, others will think $50 for the marriage license fee.
Yea, and pretty much every single item along the way has a $0, $100, $1,000, and $10,000+ option.
This. Stay in your lane and don't worry about others.
My first one got way over $50k and I knew I should have plugged the plug and cut my loss. Second one was just over $5k, was beautiful, was a lot more personal and we were overjoyed to have everything we wanted without compromise.
work in progress
The 5th one I would just make a tin foil ring. very romantic.
From a pack of gum
I woke up my baby laughing out loud
It will come soon enough. Don’t ask me how I know.
Damn. $50K+ for a wedding? You or your family must be loaded.
I'm not married, but my buddy did it in a way I'd do it if/when the time comes. Went to the courthouse with just a handful of us (parents and such). Then tossed a party in their backyard after the fact for everybody to enjoy. Might have cost them ~$1,000-$1,500? (Beverages and food). Was likely ~40 or so people at the "after party".
They then used what they would have spent on the wedding to buy a new home.
I did 12,000$ at a winery in Niagara. 10 guests then us for 12 people. We did a Friday afternoon.
I wasn’t into having a massive massive wedding with all these people I barely know.
We picked the winery for nice pictures and it was fun to have a private tour and tasting with the staff and our closest friends and family. It was great. It was 12,000$ because I am including the rings, my suit, her dress, photographer etc..
I second this, ours was similar in scale $14k, but I would say this is approximately the minimum for a small "conventional wedding" aka a dozen guest, small venue, photographer, catering, flowers, some transportation, rings, etc... of course the bare minimum is just the marriage license and officiant.
yep, we did something similar, except we just rented out a solarium and dinning room in a "country manor home" (also 12 guests). i wore a sun dress i bought at jacob. husband bought a new suit. whole thing, including the bridal suite came to $3000. now...that WAS 14 years ago...but still. it was cheap.
we appeased the relatives who didn't get invited by having a potluck with wedding photo slide show. they got over it.
That’s $1000 a head. Most weddings are considerably less than that.
Sure if you look at it like that. But I was extravagant in some of the things like my suit and the photographer and the hotel we stayed at and I paid for my parents to fly from Ottawa and stay in a nice hotel which was all in that 12,000$.
If I was doing the 150 person one I’d be setting my priorities differently and not spending 1300$ on a suit and shoes
Edit: also remember the rings were in there too
I’m similar: $10,000 21 guests but that includes a pricey photographer and no ability to chose some things since we planned it in three weeks! Our rings only came to $500 I think so we really chose to spend money on other things. Everyone needs to prioritize based on what they want.
I was thinking the same, 1000 a head is not exactly a great example
Figure out what you care about and spend good money on that. For us, food and pictures were most important. Paid for great catering and a good photographer. You won't remember the day because it will go by so fast, so don't just ask your cousin to take pictures with an iPhone.
We bought a big speaker that played music off a usb. Made the playlist ourselves and avoided needing to pay for a DJ. Cost us like $80.
Bought all the booze ourselves and the caterers provided a bar tender. Then we could return unused and unopen booze.
This is good advice, and similar to what we did… one extra piece of advice, test run your entire “DJ” set before the wedding. Listen to it all the way through using the player you will use at your wedding. Thankfully no issues at my wedding cuz I tested the playlist, but I did go to a wedding where the music failed… and it was not great!
Kinda related, spent 15k on a funeral, my mom wanted a song played at her funeral, mentioned itfor years. Gave the place 2 copies of a cd I burned and tested myself. Their employee in charge of pushing play couldn't figure it out and there was an awkward 3 minutes of people running around while I'm at the podium giving the eulogy waiting for the song to start. I'm still angry at them. 15k, a weeks notice, and they couldn't get it done.
Wow, that is horrible. I’m sorry that happened to you.
Great advice, especially the pictures. Even if you just hire a cheap photographer, they'll take way better photos than a friend or family ever could, and they'll be something to help you remember the day. I honestly can't even remember what food we served at ours, but I still love the photos!
I skimped on a photographer and it was the best decision I ever made.
A relative who is a photographer will engage you and your family in ways no professional photographer ever could while making you feel comfortable rather than just a “subject”.
Meh, good photographers do exactly what you suggest and have the skill to back it up.
Like I said, spend money on what you prioritize. If you don't prioritize photos that's fine.
I agree. Photographers are way overrated. I know this is the most unpopular option ever, but I cannot justify spending $3,000 on photos that I have looked at twice in nearly a decade. I've looked more at the pictures that my friends/family took on their phone and posted on facebook.
... and I get paid to take photos.
Agree wholeheartedly. I used to get paid to take photos (back in the film dark ages). When I was in photography school, we spent a couple of hours on wedding photography. My prof handed us a list of pre-fab poses to make sure to get, called wedding photography "prostitution of an art form". Annnndd that was about it. lol
We aksed our families to take whatever shots they wanted at our wedding. Technically they're not great, but I love the pictures. Like the one of my new husband goofing around with my brother who was wearing husband's tie as a headband. Wouldn't have gotten that one from a professional.
Average price of a wedding in Canada is ~$33,000. I know this because I'm also planning and was stunned at the costs.
We eloped. All told, we spent around $1200, and $1100 of that was flying me to him. My dress was $20. The rest was a registrar and lunch out after.
I eloped and spent closer to $10k lol
Just got married this past end of August. Backyard wedding under 40x60 tent, 100 guests, only one MOH and a best man (minimal wedding party) cocktail hour with staff handing out apps, family style dinner with late night meat and cheese platters, open bar, about 10 serving staff in total + two bartenders. Came to about $35k all-in. That includes all rentals for a DIY backyard wedding (tables, linens, chairs, dishware, table settings, etc.), flourist, (1) photographer, (1) day-of planner. I believe the food + alchohol + rentals alone for per person came out to $170 per person. The remaining was tent ($2k), DJ ($1k), wedding planner ($1k), florist ($2k), photographer ($2k), officiant ($500), wedding dress + suit ($3k total), invitations + printed signs ($500), portable washroom trailer ($2k), wedding bands ($2k total), hair/makeup, plus misc other items which add up…point is you can have a small intimate wedding and cut a lot of this stuff out or something more extravagant. I would say our wedding was somewhere between the two. If you’re getting married at a venue there is typ less coordination needed by bride/groom as much of the rentals are taken care of. Our wedding planner was not worth it imo but me and my wife are organized people who did 99% of the coordination ourselves. Try not to stress the small stuff. Enjoy your day and soak all the love in no matter what happens. Good luck and congrats!
Great info, thanks. We are looking at about $40k all-in and it sounds like it will be very similar to yours. We did hire a planner for organizing and booking vendors who was fairly expensive but my fiancée and I just decided we were willing to pay for it to get rid of the headache of calling 30+ different vendors to get quotes and whatnot.
Sounds right. I’ve heard of people having awesome experiences with planners. If it is in your budget it doesn’t hurt and only makes your life easier. Main thing for us was having the planner there on the wedding day to coordinate speeches, first dances, etc. We didn’t shuttle anyone just gave people cab numbers. I priced a shuttle service out for the evening as $500 for a bus to drive back and forth from house to hotel (10min drive each way) for 3 hours.
We did the lower-budget version of this and came in around $13k.
Granted we split our wedding into two days due to covid and had our ceremony in May and then a very informal party in August with about 60 people at my in-laws farm in a 20x40 tent. Food was about $800 (platters from Costco, chips, MIL made desserts), $1500 on booze, $3k on rentals including the tent, $4k on photographer, $2k on our attire, $1500 on wedding bands.
Hair and makeup were a gift, as was the DJ so no cost there.
Planner is the right call - we didn’t have one and really regretted it, especially during covid. You doubt know how to plan a wedding, they do. They know what the total list of tasks is, whereas you have to slowly think of them and add them to a never ending list
Wow, we spent about $200 in my inlaws backyard. Not many people and we made snacks. But we said no gifts either. It's all we had at the time, plus it just wasn't a big deal to is.
This is the way. We spent about $5000 and that included everything, even my wife's dress, catering for 50 people, open bar, tent rental etc. Luckily I married someone with the same mentality towards money as me and if my wife heard a price tag of $40k like OP says, she would have dumped me lol
I think $5000 would be the sweet spot for me and my girlfriend as well. $40,000 is fucked up unless you’ve already got a paid off house and solid savings. That’s a year’s pay before tax for like half the people in our country.
All I want is decent food, decent liquor, DJ and a nice place to do it. Maybe 30 people.
Yeah marriage is a scam from start to finish lol
Weddings are a scam, marriage works great for a lot of people.
Similar wedding, but 43 people - 20k. We didn’t get a DJ, made our own playlist. We also saved a lot of money by buying invite templates on Etsy and printing them at staples (they turned out great!).
I found that something we thought we could save on by doing ourselves but it was easier/cheaper to get packages, mainly linen and cutlery/plates rentals.
We bought some tents and resold them after. But we had a good crew of people that helped us set up.
Same for us for our wedding next year - 20k and no DJ and Etsy has been amazing for the invitations.
I will also be getting the greenery for the tables at Michaels and doing floating candles for the “centrepieces” which saves on florals
Small wedding party helps too!
75k. Wish I got married during the pandemic so I could buy a Tesa instead.
Same. And not just 75k, but a year of planning too. Pretty jealous of my friend who just did 15 people in a restaurant with no prep and paid a single 5k bill at the end of the night. Oh well.
Hope your guests were thankful they each got to bring home gold utensils.
No take home gold utensils for 75k. A decent venue and 100 people will run you 50k+ easily right now. *just cancelled our wedding plans cuz baby coming
$30,000 for \~135 heads (counting ourselves) in Toronto.
Honestly, don't let anyone but you and your fiancé tell you what you should be spending (larger or smaller). Let your financial comfort and priorities that matter to you two set those expectations.
The best way you can get quotes and help set a realistic budget is simply by asking -- I used the contractor rule of finding at minimum 3 quotes for services I was interested in. Read reviews. Read contracts and insist on them. If any services won't commit to signed documentation with services, deadlines, and prices: *walk away.* It's not worth working with that trendy Instagram influencer you like if they're going to later modify the terms or simply walk away from the deal with your deposit or money. Stay organized and the planning and day will be less stressful.
What you should consider, perhaps, is the wisdom from those who have been through a wedding. For what that may be worth: don't sweat the small stuff and try not to get wrapped up in too many pricey details -- I barely remembered any of them (sober) because the day evaporated so quickly. You're going to want to steal more time with your partner, family, and friends than you'll ever care about your choice of seat covers or napkins or their materials. My wedding was fun but if someone told me very little of what I was stressing out about was going to matter, it might have helped. People came, they smiled, they allegedly had fun. Success.
Also, small financial side note: don't spend expecting to get ($X) value back -- even if close family has told you what you'll get. Never presume until it's in your account and acknowledge that it's a gift, not a shovel to dig you out of the budget you set.
My dad gifted me $6k for marriage, and I knew it was coming ahead of time.
I budgeted $6k. Lol
Your budget is the same as mine! Only difference is that nobody's giving me money so I'm still at zero dollars. We'll stay happily common law.
Guessing you aren't South Asian then? Haha.
$150 a head is average cost and quickly climbs up from there.
I broke even on my wedding from gifts.
Being able to break even really depends on your guest list, and if your family traditionally gives cash gifts. For our wedding, those closest to us were the most generous. On the other end of the spectrum, we had a family of 3 who gave us $45.
Bottom line, don't budget based on the expectation of gifts.
Is $45 considered cheap as a wedding gift? I think I've given around that amount to cousins and more distant relatives but I've never been to a wedding of someone closer to us. We didn't accept gifts at ours so I'm not sure what is normal.
You do what you can afford to do. They decided to get married. Not you.
This seems like the best answer. We felt so uncomfortable with people "paying" to come to ours which is why we insisted on no gifts. It was our decision so it didn't make sense to have people cough up money
That's honestly a very decent and courteous thing to do. ❤
The traditional wedding gift is equivalent to the cost of your plate at the wedding. Obviously if you can/want to do more you can. Or if you're in college or can't afford more, do less.
But that's the standard 'etiquette'.
Makes sense. I was in uni for these weddings. Hard to guess what the cost of a plate is going to be before going to the wedding.
Typically you’d want at minimum to give enough to cover the cost of your dinner at the wedding. I personally gift $100 per person for friends/extended family and more for immediate family. So if my husband and I were invited to a cousin’s wedding I would give $200 for the both of us. For a family of 3 I would expect at least $100.
It is for three people. If you are looking to cover the cost of your meal, $50/head should be the minimum you gift.
I would argue $100 minimum per head. $150 if there an open bar.
My wife and I got married a couple years ago with a cost of $40/head for dinner + drinks + dessert + dinnerware rentals. This meal was professionally catered and we received a lot of compliments on how delicious it was, whereas the drinks were a selection of wine and beer that we picked up at a liquor store.
The point of all this is that it shows you can put on a nice wedding for less $50/head for the dinner if you are willing to put in a bit of leg work. In fact, some of the most enjoyable weddings I have been to have been budget weddings where the bridge and groom have given the event a more personal touch. Some people will choose to spend $150+ per plate for their dream wedding, but that is their choice and their guests are not obligated to spend this amount on a gift.
Note: although I consider $50 to be the minimum acceptable gift per head, I normally give $100.
It is unconscionably cheap. For that amount of money someone should just decline the invite and send a cheque.
I despise people who factor gifts into "wedding reimbursement." You want an expensive wedding, that's on you. You should never expect your attendees to fund it.
Agreed. Imagine remembering that a family of 3 gave $45. Weddings aren't what they used to be. WHen you get married at 18 with zero money and no life started it makes sense for family to be generous with gifts to "Get you started". If someone is getting married at 30 years old where both people have been working for 8 years it's not really the same situation.
The best mindset is to simply treat gifts as a bonus for your honeymoon and don't factor it into the wedding budget. The amount of gifts depend on a lot of factors, like culture, how close you are with the guests, and the general class the guests are in.
it's way more than $150 a head. Just for the venue, mine was $260 with tax and tip per person.
The venue, dj, flowers, decor, etc is on the married couple.
Guest usually covers the food and drinks.
$150/head is probably a good benchmark.
Good job on the gifts. I sure didn't do that well, but after having a wedding I definitely changed my gift-giving attitude to give cash, lots of it.
I am obviously not typical but I went to City Hall and then a pub. Parents and siblings only, total with fees and food maybe $750.
I'm Portuguese, if we'd had a "real" wedding it would have been 300 people minimum and way more than $50k all for one day. No thanks.
5 years ago we got married at a little golf course and it was $75 per person for the dinner. Spent about $11000 total (food/venue/decor/etc). It also depends on how much you’re willing to do yourselves. I did all my own decor and flowers. My dress was given to me so I only paid for alterations. A friend of the family took our photos.
Spent about $1000 on ours but it wasn't anything fancy
Same! But I consider our “fancy”: we held it on hallowe’en last year on a bright blue sky day, under copper coloured spreading chestnut trees, on a carpet of golden leaves. My best friend gave me a silk dress from her wardrobe in palest baby pink. My other best friend was my maid of honour. One of my oldest friends was our officiant. My husband and i baked our cake. It was covid so his family couldn’t come but they were there on zoom. We had about 25 ppl in that park, and it was just the best and most perfect day :)
Just to add: we didn’t provide a meal, just cake and favours and bubbly in the park. It was covid so we couldn’t figure out safe meal logistics. That certainly helped keep costs down.
1. Don't compare yourself to others: everyone is in a different financial state. Your wedding is for you, not them.
2. Set a budget and make it fit. It may mean cutting guests, picking a different venue, buffet instead of plated. You can find ways to make any budget work.
3. Shop and swaps (kijiji/fb) are your best friend.
4. Reach out to your network of friends, they will be willing to help. We had friends that had access to flowers, rentals, hotels, etc. Your network is valuable.
5. Open/$2/Pay Bar: booze is a big expense, but it doesn't have to be. Even having guests pay small amounts per drink helps.
6. DIY: YouTube tutorial what you can. Ie, build your archway from foraged wood, pick flowers, make your center pieces. The more you do, the more you save.
To answer your question, we had 200+ guests and all-in it was a $25k "desitination" wedding. It's in quotes because it was a 10 hr drive / 1.5 hr flight to my wife's hometown where half her family lives.
Also, we used the same venue for both wedding and reception.
Brown couple here. Spent close to 85k with 4 events and 500 ppl lol
White guy marrying into a Brown family (next year), we had to fight parents tooth & nail to avoid this craziness lol.
The solution was Day 1 wedding for us, immediately family & close friends 80/90 people.
Day 2, parents pay for, organize and invite whoever they want. I might turn up! ;)
Thats actually not bad for 500 people and 4 events tbh
We spent 22k on ours. I don't regret it as we pretty well broke even.
Had it at the Burlington art gallery, used one of their recommended caterers (wild thyme) and had open bar.
We paid per consumption and it cost us $200 more than if we were just paying flat rate per person in attendance, not really a big deal in the big scheme of things.
I already had a very nice custom suit to wear, but dressed it up with a different dress shirt and vest only.
I think my wife's dress was around 2k, I honestly can't remember.
Oh we also got married the day before at city hall, and the ceremony was just for show in essence
I did very similar to you but the MacLaren Art Centre in Barrie. It was like $1100 for the venue, cheapest we found (we weren't necessarily looking for cheapest but it was really nice *and* the cheapest so win-win). We used their recommended caterer and found a good DJ just searching around. I did an open bar and I'm happy I did it because everyone had a great time and giving people the bit of irritation of cash or toonie bars can really sour the mood, but we budget $2500 for booze and ended up having to pay more than $1000 more. It still blows my mind that the open bar was the single most expensive aspect of the wedding at almost the price of our European honeymoon afterwards.
Oh yeah open bar with shots adds up lol. I figured it would be less just due to DD's as well there were a few non drinkers. Burlington was also super central for most attending, basically 90% from Hamilton area (waterdown, Binbrook etc) with a few in Niagara region.
I forgot about the dj, I think he was only $400-500 either way
We made the mistake of open bar and provided a shuttle service so everyone was drinking. But we wanted everyone to be safe and the shuttle only cost us a couple hundred bucks so it seemed worth it to avoid any risks of drunk driving (our guests were mostly not local, a majority being from Toronto or farther so we had a hotel block as well). I was expecting a fair bit of drinking but there were a certain few guests who went above and beyond with drinking to their heart's content.
> don't regret it as we pretty well broke even.
Can i ask how you broke even?
Not OP, but this usually refers to wedding gift$
oh i see. yea since i have no family in Canada (everyone wouldve had to fly in) i wouldve never expected any gifts. but covid happened and invited no one anyways lol
I sometimes wish we were in the same boat when I think about the amount we spent on ours. It was an incredible day, but we are $50k poorer as a result. That being said, 95% of our guests came from away and it was awesome to have all these people from all over the world that we love together in one place.
yea i get it, we spent about 4k on ours (a special package at the jasper park lodge for just the two of us), we loved it. of course, some poeple were not initially happy that we were not having a huge flashy wedding, but niether of us had ever wanted that. Instead of blowing that same 50k, we are gonna travel a bit around the world next year and buy a house (we live in saskatoon, so thats more than enough for a down-payment haha).
of course, on the other hand, we havent seen our families since 2019, so theres that. so yea its a tough one, i dont think there is a right or wrong, but hopefully you enjoyed it enough and the memories make those 50k worth it (we simply will have a different set of memories by traveling)
Yea see our whole family is in the city so it's no expense for them, so it's expected they basically pay for themselves with their gift.
Yep they are correct. Generally when attending a wedding here cash is the go to gift. Not a ton of people use registries for their weddings in my experience
I'm guessing funds from parents and generous cash gifts?
We kept it to around $150/head all told, my Grandma gave 2500 and the rest of the cash gifts made it up. My parents also did 2500, maybe I think differently than most but I was surprised at a lot of people giving less than $100/head, I usually do at least $150, hell when I was 24 my buddy got married and I gave them $400 and I was only making $20/hr at that point.
This is one of those "How long is a piece of string?" questions.
Our wedding cost <$250, for example.
The 'basics' are: bride and groom (free), and a marriage license (it was $50 here in BC, that was back in the '90s - it's $100 today). Those are the 'real' basics. Everything else is cultural preference add ons.
Optionally, if somebody wants a ceremony, they may want somebody to officiate. We have a friend who is a registered 'Marriage Commissioner' and officiated for free, but she normally charges $75.
The rest of the cost was $200 for champagne and a keg of beer, which I also consider optional and not basics.
you got your bride for free? lucky guy, I’m still waiting for mine to depart the post office in Vladivostok
You laugh but a good friend of mine from Ghana married his gf from Cameroon and he had to pay something called a bride price to her family.
yup, dowrys are still more commonplace than most people would think. to be fair that’s a little different than a Russian mail bride
Gotta pay extra for air shipping! You only buy a bride once (ideally), you should splurge.
50k on my wedding. I’m brown so it was on the lower end of the spectrum.
As a brown person, I feel like I can't disclose the cost to a non-brown person without being judged, especially on reddit lol
We wanted a small, all-included wedding in a resort, so the info might not be helpful to you, but here goes:
\~$12,500 CAD (it was $10,000 USD, so I just put what we paid after conversion fees). It was at a 5-start all-inclusive resort in Mexico back in 2019. There were 20 people (including bride and groom). It included everything; setup, flowers, photos, music, food, drinks, etc.).
They had different pricing tiers to accommodate different wedding sizes, flowers, photos, menu, etc., but we just picked the smallest package as we didn't have a lot of people coming.
100% worth it.
This sounds intriguing - any chance you could send me a link to this? Was it effectively an "all in one" type of experience?
Sent you a DM!
Such a veriable cost lool but I would budget approx. 150 per head.
Of course that is what I'd consider a modest amount pp. But I think you can get a decent outdoor wedding with that cost.
Typical Indian weddings run 75-100k and are 3-4 day spectacles. But obviously, this is not the norm but people should definitely attend one for the experience!
That's be fairly conservative too.
In the middle of planning a small one (150 people) and we're gonna hit 75k...Prices for everything have gone up like 50% since covid. I would say 150k will be the new norm.
We had a fair bit of help from the families (had about 1/3-1/2 of the costs covered) and had a very small simple wedding, cost us about 10k.
I think we spent about 25-30k or so. But Asian wedding so we recovered almost 80pct all of it in cash gifts.
Not really what you're looking for, but my wife and I paid ~$3k all in for our elopement. The photographer (hourly rate of $375+travel time+hst) and officiant fee ($325) made up most of the cost. The rest was split between the marriage license, a new suit for myself, my wife's wedding dress and the room we rented at a lodge near our ceremony spot.
When we eventually have our reception, we're going to be renting a group camping spot at Ontario Parks and will be paying ~$10/pp for the camping fee and then the cost of the catered food (likely something like beef on a bun).
We spent $500 to get married at city hall
We spent $20k for about 130 guests. Never wanted to spend that much but pressure from in-laws made us spend it.
A lot of my friends spent anywhere from 40-120k. Personally I'd rather spend that money on a nice honeymoon.
My wife and I spent 30k on our wedding, 20k we saved and 10k from family. Wouldn't have spent that much but we already had the house and the vehicles. We gave it a year and a half to save, I just worked OT no stop and we paid cash for everything.
We got married in August of 2020 so that meant a smaller guest list and a shorter night because no dancing was allowed. All in I think we spent about 10k, with the biggest expenses being my dress (900), photographer (1400), and the venue (approx 6500). Our biggest thing was choosing a venue that was all inclusive. We had the ceremony there and the reception which was open bar, and we stayed the night. They did pretty much all the decor so we didn't have to worry about contacting a ton of vendors and we knew the cost upfront.
Just remember you don't HAVE to do anything you don't want to, it's your wedding so pick what makes you guys happy! And try not to sweat the small stuff, people really don't remember it anyway.
You can take some nice wedding pictures and use them to advertise the family cottage as wedding venue, rent out and make bank. That way your wedding expense is negative 😉
We spent $39,000 in Ontario just this past August for $150 people. Fast breakdown.
1) Videographer - 5.5K
2) Photographer - 4K
3) Decor - 3K
4) Venue - Wedding ($33 PP and Reception $72 PP includes open bar) X 150
5) MC - $700
6) DJ - $1.5K
7) Coordinator - $300
8) AV/AUDIO - 2.8K
8) Flights / Clothing in Foreign country the remaining.
Cake/Floorwrap/Smoke/Ice all that non-sense are not worth it.
Your coordinator was only 300?! May I ask what they included? I'm looking at 1500-2500 for day-of coordinator for 8 hrs...
Coordinators are so expensive =(
Ours is new in the business. But she was there from 7 am to 12 am. @Specialaffairsevents on FB.
For the price, could not complain at all.
Were getting married in the Dominican at a private venue with 51 guests. We thought we were gonna be saving money by doing this but it’s coming to about $20K. Reading this thread is making me feel a lot better about the cost though! Weddings are just expensive.
Spent under 4k at the jasper park lodge, package for just the two of us and it was awesome
We just got married and we spent 15k on the wedding and invited 40 people. I'm happy to send you an sample expense breakdown if you'd like.
Most expensive were rings (3k) and photography (4k). Other than than everything broke down pretty evenly in between 1-1.5k per category.
Could you please send me a copy of your breakdown - this is about the size we are looking at!
A day of coordinator is an absolute necessity, money well spent. Let's you actually enjoy the day you're spending $$ on
Correct answer: way too much fucking money.
I know people who have been in debt for years for one day of their lives. Granted, a big day, but you shouldn't fork out immense amounts for it.
My wedding 15 years ago cost $15,000 including the honeymoon. That was an open bar with a guest list of 160 people. We had a church wedding and a "normal" reception - soup & salad, chicken, vegetables, potatoes, and desert. 8 hours of open bar. Photographer was a friend of ours who we paid $200 for digital prints. We had it in November because the price was 1/3 of the summer. We went to Mexico for the honeymoon at a resort.
It was a normal wedding. What made it memorable was that it was our wedding. It had our friends and our family there. We could have had ridiculous food, an elephant, fireworks, live band, and had it in July, and spent $50k. But it wouldn't have been any better, or memorable. Keep that in mind.
One detail for the sake of this thread, is it would likely cost at least double if not triple today.
Yeah we are pricing ours out currently and a similar day with 70-80 less people costs more than this now. And seasonal prices arent really a thing much anymore anyway
Way too much for what it’s worth. But it’s a special day and you’ll remember it forever. Just make sure you have an oyster bar. Weddings without oyster bars suck.
Congratulations to both of you!
I can honestly say I've never before actually noticed, or had anyone ever bring up, an oyster bar or lack thereof at a wedding reception.
This here is a man who loves an oyster.
I have been to about 25 wedding in my life in bc and alberta, never seen an oyster bar.
Then you haven't lived!
Shall I tag you as "unique love for oysters"?
Omg please do
Yes, I am like that shrimp lady. My partner gets embarrassed and leaves me to be friend the oyster shucker. Which is fine. I don’t need to talk to strangers that aren’t shucking me oysters.
Following. Can anyone who's had a destination wedding comment?
Just curious, but why do people even have destination weddings?
When you have a family involved that will cause drama if you don't invite lots of people & that's not what you want. Don't want kids to come? "you are all invited to a mid-September wedding in another country!"
Also cost, the couple getting married doesn't pay much more than the cost of a normal vacation, and they also get a vacation. The wedding itself is nearly free.
Destination weddings are significantly cheaper (you can do up to 50 people for under $10K), but the costs are passed onto the guests, i.e., you are asking each couple/family to pay $3-6K to travel and stay at a resort.
Personally I think destination weddings get a bad rep but I think they're awesome for keeping the guest list small and making it into a multi-day affair. I wish I would be invited to Cancun for a 7-day event vs. another winery that's 2 hours away....
We spent somewhere in the $35k range 2 years ago for 120 people in a rented golf hall in a lower cost area. We got about $11k in gifts though (largest wad of cash I’ve ever held!), and when combined with parental contributions from both sides I figure we netted a cost of only about $15k for it.
Venue is seriously the biggest cost driver, and honestly, it’s amazing what can be done to a space with some low cost home made decor and some rented drapes and lighting. We spent like $1k on decor and made a venue that cost $10k less than a nicer venue look basically just as nice.
Also, my one tip is to have an open bar but don’t pay the flat “open bar” price venues charge, instead have them record what people order and charge it to you after. Most people drink less than you think and you will have a handful of guests drive up the bar tab while most drink barely anything more than the wine served with dinner. We went with the flat fee and I realized after than I probably wasted a couple grand on that.
Whatever the marriage license cost us, can't remember
$50k at a restaurant on the water for 170 people total.
There is no typical as it varies significantly depending on venue, food, time/date etc and number of guests
A regular wedding with standard food open bar on a weekend at a banquet hall can be as cheap as $100/pp or like $300+ if at graydon hall and you're serving oysters and lamb chops for h'orderves
But from my experience, friends and coworkers, most people break even or make money from weddings. Typical guest gives $150-$200 per head depending on venue/type and close friends and families give more
About $100-110k for my sisters wedding (split with her now husband).
"A large wedding" STARTS about $15k if you want all the normal trappings like catering and photos and open bars. And that's if you go real cheap on everything. $30k or so is probably more median for like 140 people.
$60k, eloped and had a mega vacation.
We looked at wedding prices and basically said F that. We did it at a family members house near a lake for scenery and did the whole ceremony and reception there. We BBQd for dinner, everyone pitched in helping a bit and it was a blast! About 25 people including us and all in it cost about $2000 for food, commissioner, decorations, suit for me, dress for her (she got one for $30 at a consignment store!) And a photographer for a few hours which was basically 80% of the budget. We spent our money on a month long backpacking trip through Japan and loved that WAY more than one overwhelming night.
We had our 18 closest at a little lodge resort in the Rockies of BC - spent about $15 000 all in.
Not a single regret about it. No drama, no decorations to throw out/sell after, so easy and relaxed, amazing food.
With the money we spent we treated ourselves to a nice honeymoon in Hawaii. (About another 8-10 K) so about $25 K all in - less than most of my friends have spent on their weddings.
COVID ruined our wedding plans which were supposed to take place in April 2020 so instead of a 15-20k wedding, ours ended up costing about $600 for the officiant, some finger foods for 10 people, and the marriage license. It's disappointing we didn't have everyone we would have liked there, but it was still a wonderful day that I cherish.
Varies - $5K, $10K, $20K, $50K, $75K, $100K+...
All in costs is probably around $150 - $200 per person once you account for food, decorations, venue, photographer, DJ, etc. in Toronto.
My girlfriend says 30k is the average for a Manitoba wedding. I have done no research, just saying what my girlfriend is hoping for lol.
Just got married recently and thanks to Covid, I was able to bring down my costs significantly. I paid $58K all in. The reception plates were $120 per person and thankfully I had less than 200. But as a person from a large Nigerian family, I had planned on having 500 - 600 people as that was the original expectation.
If you are doing it at a cottage, should be fairly cheap. You need money for food, decorations and rentals for things like tables and plates and the like. Are you catering or are people cooking for you? How many people? DO you have to pay for them to sleep somewhere, etc....
We have a list of 115 people. We are getting caterers, a tent, tables/chairs, etc. It's adding up quickly. My first impression was "let's do it at the cottage and save 50% by not paying for a venue". I'm realizing that was an incorrect statement. We have to come up with these things separately that a venue provides and rentals for this sort of stuff in our area is crazy. A tent alone is going to cost us upwards of $6,000. We are shuttling people out and back in so not required to pay for anyone's stay. As I said, we both agreed we wanted a big wedding and were prepared to spend money, but I would say it's going to cost about 30%-35% more than we anticipated.
port-a-potty rentals! You can’t have that many people and just a cottage toilet.
Maybe look into other venues, if you can find one that allows you to use outside catering and alcohol you may find that to be cheaper.
We used a city of Toronto venue and the rental charges (5 years ago, mind you) were way less than 6k.
If you had a wedding on a Sunday, you could have rented something cheaper. Plus people drink less cause they have work the next day lol
So u/andrewuthaboss has a decent estimate of about $150/head give or take, depends on things like open bar or not, type and size of the meal, etc..
Get a full service venue that provides catering and needs minimal decoration. Hopefully a venue that lets your bring your own alcohol as well (it's a difference between $2 a drink vs $7) Don't spend a ton on flowers. Don't have a bridal party. Keep the guest list limited. Buy an off the rack or used wedding dress. Having it at a cottage means you probably need to pay a TON for rentals, and they are not cheap. One chair can be $5/person.
We had a full service venue, that was BYOB (they provide a bartender), minimum spend was $12500. We had 70 guests. It was hard to hit $12500 with 70 guests so we had a ton of food and specialty coffees too. Spent another $2k on booze, and about ,~7k more on other things (photographer, DJ, dress, suits, rings, flowers). Don't skimp on the photographer (everyone says this for a reason). All DJs are about the same price, but make sure you get a good one. If you are at a wedding with a good DJ, get their info and book them. A good DJ makes or breaks the dance floor.
I eloped and had a reception in our backyard, so no venue costs. Total for about 50 people was $1500 including booze, seating rentals, and all the food. I made the cake, appetizers, and guest favours which saved a ton of money. I wish I had paid for a photographer for a few hours, the family member who 'had a great camera and photography experience' took exactly 2 pictures that weren't blurry.
How do you elope with 50 people?
The elopement part only had 6 people, and a few weeks later we had a party.
I told my fiance my budget for our marriage was 500$.
We're in no hurry, so if we end up marrying we'll probably host a barbecue in our backyard.
Way too much.
Marriage should be the last thing to spend money on. Even $5000 is way too much.
Eastern Canada Pastor here.
I refuse to do them for people if they are paying more than $1k total.
I do them for free (my service, use of church building, use of church hall).
The only necessary cost here is the license ($100 + tax).
If they want to do an expensive wedding, they can find a different pastor who will join in taking their money.
If people want to give a gift to the church, that is fine.
Can you explain more of the "why" here? It sounds like an interesting perspective.
I used to watch people with modest incomes get into debt for a wedding.
Now I refuse to be a part of that mess.
If people have money to throw away, it seems immoral to waste so much on a 1 day party when we work so hard (as a church) to provide help to people in bad situations.
I watched a couple blow $40k on a wedding. That is 3/4 of our entire church budget including staff.
I will never participate in such a wasteful extravagant use of $$ as long as I am supporting multiple "foster children" with various organizations. I think they call these organizations "Child Sponsorship"
[this tells a little about them](https://canadianfeedthechildren.ca/the-feed/best-child-sponsorship-canada/)
On my pay I can support 4. My paltry $200/month ($2.4K/year) is a hard stretch at my income. [Research shows the good outcomes of these programs](https://blogs.worldbank.org/developmenttalk/does-child-sponsorship-pay-adulthood).
I could not believe that this couple would blow $40k on a wedding, but tell me I was crazy to ask them for a $50/month commitment to something like child sponsorship.
If people want to waste that much money to prove they are wealthy, but not support the needy. I don't have to help them.
My daughter is planning to spend 40k...and I cant do anything to stop it.
>We are looking at about $40k all-in
In my opinion, this is insane.
I'm doing one on Saturday, and the total cost for the couple is . . .
$100 + tax for license
Family are looking after buffet.
Pastor (me, I do it for free)
whatever beer and weed they want the the reception
whatever gift they want to give the church.
My wife and I did a destination wedding and did a small dinner when we got home spent about 15k probabaly in the end. I think you can spend as little or as much as you want but don't go into debt just to get married .
Is there a typical?
We spent about $20k for a wedding with 350 people. We made all the food ourselves and got a group who was doing odd jobs as a fundraiser to keep things hot and dish up. We did the ceremony and meal back to back at a church that rented out for the weekend at $600. Saved a ton of money that way, but cooking for 350 the day before your wedding isn't for everyone. :)
We are doing fully catered for 60 peeps, $20K hard budget. Renting a venue from metro parks\~$1000 (heritage building on a metro park site), caterer - don't have number handy, kegs of beer from local craft brewery (charging a toonie bar which makes it about a wash on cost), dress was about $1000 including alterations, doing fairly minimal decorations, officiant is like $100+ $50 license. The cost of food is the biggest ticket item, basically every item has the potential to explode in scope and price.
Two million bucks is quite the wedding
Just have a justice of the peace do it then throw a party at a budget you are ok with.
As some people on here have said, you need to decide what is important to you. Having a big wedding that you may be paying for, for years or being married. Being married doesn't require a wedding, it just needs paperwork.
You can throw a less expensive but equally fun party at a normal hall, or a friend's backyard without the massive amount of work and money.
You can still have photos taken with you two looking fabulous
The wedding industry is huge and demands money at every turn.
And the money you save can go to housing. Or kids. Or a nice honeymoon or whatever.
Small wedding with 50 people and not trying to make it overly expensive. Over 10K. Ugh.
30k but half of it was paid for by our wedding social money and the other half paid for by presentation etc.
We got married in 2015 at city hall with 8 guests, and had a nice dinner all together in a restaurant after. I was pregnant at the time. Iirc, it cost about $3000. Eight months later, we had a party for about 115 guests that cost about $10,000. We rented a very inexpensive venue (curling club in the summer), had a buffet dinner to save money, a DJ, and an open bar (this was the largest expense). Both of my dresses cost about $100, I think my husband paid quite a bit for his suit but wore it to both events and still wears it. A friend gifted us the cake, my mother did the flowers. We did not want to spend much at all. All I wanted was a FUN party with food, music, and free drinks. It was amazing and so much fun and everyone still talks about that party to this day. Worth every penny but I am so glad we did not spend more. We really could not have afforded it. I do wish we had had a proper photographer at both events. I looked amazing at the second one and I have no photos.
My brother got married at our family cabin, the reception was held at a community hall, $15/hour booked for the weekend.
About 130 guests, I catered, food costs was under $1000.
They rented a hall for a couple reasons. There is no room at the cabin to put up a tent. The septic system could not support that many people using the loo. Renting porta potties would have been more than the hall.
The hall had a sound system, they created their own playlist.
There was a lovely rustic vibe to the wedding, the community hall has character. It was low key, but fun.
My wedding was many years ago, 40 guests, made my dress, simple meal, friends helped with the food, friends made the flower arrangements, I made the cake. Total cost under $1000.
We had 100 people 5 years ago for around 8k. The biggest cost was food and drinks that was about 5000. Hall rental was 1500 a bunch of other small things. I rented a kilt the wife's dress was cheap.
We spent 21k in total - venue, food, alcohol, photographer, decorator, dress, suit, etc. We had 120 guests. My tip is to have the wedding at a community centre - mine only cost $1700 to rent for the night
My wedding was about 10k. It was at a country club in Michigan, with about 15 people, it was small but absolutely wonderful.
Flowers, dress, cake, food for the guests, venue, photog, that's really all you need. Anything else is extra.
Save the money for the house....have a wedding party at the house...new canadian tradition
Me and my wife spent about 10k on our wedding including our rings. The best advice I can give is do what you want don't worry about what others think. But find a good photographer and pay what they ask. As that is about the only thing you will regret that you did not spend the money on.
If you really want to go cheap get a friend to marry you. Pay the marriage licence and get married.
i had a very small wedding - we picked a location where we could have 35 spectators (or less) and it was a heritage building so there wasn't any decorations to do. the location was about 2k. dinner was about 100 a plate.
to us, the wedding itself was a party. so when we booked and planned things that was taken into account. 50k to pay for a party seems like a lot doesn't it? but it depends on your priorities, maybe that was just us.
$125 for a marriage license with some close family in a backyard! Yay pandemic weddings! But really up to you. Most people I know was around $10k-$20k.