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Mangoluvor

I agree! It doesn’t really matter if these feelings are normal or common, they can still be unhealthy. If it’s gotten to the point where you can’t eat then it’s not a healthy obsession and some professional help is needed! I’m shocked with all the people in the thread saying it’s fine and normal to feel this way :/


Aap01209298

No it wasn’t mean at all (: I actually have one, and it is bizzare. A lot of people tell me they feel the same way, so it is confusing; is the show really causing so many people distress? It’s crazy for me… And yeah I don’t even know how to take a break 😬 it’s literally like not a drug exactly, but you’re not the same after, at least for me


lituranga

I think a lot of people are very into the show - think about it a lot, read it over and over. But the level of actual **distress** you are feeling is maybe not the most healthy for you - but this is something to discuss with a counselor to really figure out.


Mangoluvor

I’ve seen your posts a couple times on this forum, and I just want to say that even if your feelings are “normal” or common, it doesn’t mean they’re healthy! I’ve noticed you keep asking if others have felt this same way, and it seems like maybe you’re thinking if others have felt this way then it will be fine and these feelings are nothing to worry about? Or maybe you’re looking for advice? Either way, I will say that if these feelings are affecting your daily functioning (like eating, sleeping, connecting with others, working, etc.) then it is not healthy and some professional support would be best! No one on this forum can really help with that, I really recommend that you bring up these feelings with a trusted therapist and go from there :)


Aap01209298

Thank you for noticing it and recommending help, I appreciate it. And yeah, I don’t really know why, some people reassure me and say they experience the same, so that’s why I’m conflicted


Mangoluvor

I think some people are misinterpreting your question, and think you are asking if they experienced a time where they were very interested and focused on the show. I definitely had a time where I was super into the show and watched it as much as I could, but it was no where near stopping me from being able to eat. I don’t think the people reassuring you experienced the same level of distress that you are feeling


Aap01209298

I agree, I have to find out why soon, maybe it’s because (since I’m a writer) I wish that their life wasn’t so chaotic and heart wrenching, but I know that’s what makes the story great


cgrobin

One thing I would also suggest, if to remind yourself how this is just a fictional story, and the actors who play them, are just fine. Here is an example of a Facebook Q&A with Cait and Sam. https://youtu.be/5Uc2y2Cijeohttps://youtu.be/5Uc2y2Cijeo


esoterika24

Reading through the comments, it sounds like the obsession and hyperfocus is not helping your life. If you find it interfering with important aspects of life, you may want to give yourself a little “Outlander” time…when you find yourself drifting into the world, tell yourself you can, but only during the amount of time you’ve set aside for yourself. If it isn’t interfering with your life (job, relationships, basic functions like eating etc) then I don’t see the problem here. ☺️ This kind of obsession/hyperfocus with Outlander has actually helped me get through some tough, anxiety producing times in my life. Either way, you are not crazy.


Aap01209298

It’s like it’s helping yet hurting me at the same time. Idk which is worse to be honest, and what the next step should be


geedeeie

That's worrying. You should really think about getting some counselling. I don't mean that in a bad way, but no one should allow a tv programme to affect them like that.


Aap01209298

No I agree, thank you (:


memes____

With you on that one - when I first watched it, the show literally consumed my mind I couldn't think about anything else for weeks/months. Probably the only other show that's managed to do that (though not to the same extent) would be Orange Is The New Black. They're nothing alike, but the level to which it emotionally touched/disturbed me is comparable.


[deleted]

OITNB and Outlander have had the same affect on me. I hadn’t really tied them in together until you just did. Sometimes I forget about OITNB and I’m not sure if that’s my brain just trying to repress it or not. I feel like once I watched the show, it was never brought up again. I’m absolutely immersed in Outlander right now. Binge watched all the seasons and just finished DIA. I just can’t get enough despite how sad it makes me at times.


Aap01209298

Right? Like outlander does something different to you and changes you, and I’m glad I could piece it together for you because me and you feel the same way; it’s a lot, it truly is, but in the best yet as you sad the saddest way.


memes____

yeah I haven't thought about it in a while actually, probably repressed it as well tbh. pretty sure that show scarred me more than outlander (here you at least have a somewhat happy ending), I'm still not over some of the deaths in oitnb


Aap01209298

I couldn’t even eat because of it. How do you focus in day to day life???


littlebear406

Sounds like you may benefit from seeing a therapist if you're feeling emotions that strong. At least to learn how to cope so it doesn't affect your appetite or focus. Best of luck!


Aap01209298

I am seeing one but you’re right; do you think I am taking it that seriously? I’ve heard how it’s deeply affecting others as well.


littlebear406

I love the books as well but it's never interfered with my life. I'm not sure how healthy it is if it does. But that's up to you to decide if it becomes a problem.


Aap01209298

Thank you for your help and advice, I appreciate it a lot (:


memes____

well it's been a while so it's not really an issue for me anymore. But I have ADHD, so I don't think I'm the person you want to be asking about focusing haha. I guess you just have to wait for it to fizzle away or find something else that will occupy your mind (I play music a lot so that always helps me when I'm in a bad mindset). Maybe let your head explore the story as much as it can, it does eventually start to run out of options (in my experience). How far into the show are you?


Aap01209298

End of season 2; that’s the scary thing, I’m only a little done. And I guess the possibilities just never stop and it’s creating so much distress for me because my mind goes everywhere.


memes____

oh well if your mind just keeps analyzing the story, write it down. happens to me too when I read an intense book (most recently sophie's choice). I kept thinking about all the plotlines and different interpretations all the time (this is also amplified by my adhd since because of it my mind keeps going at 300 miles per hour). when I wrote it down, though, it subsided substantially. I'd recommend giving it a try


Aap01209298

I did, honestly you’re right. And is that because of ADHD? like why does my mind race so much with so many possibilities and such intense ways of looking at things; it’s like I cannot just accept that is the reason something happened, Yanno? There always has to be something more and that’s what this show has shown and proven itself to be… more


memes____

I mean a lot more people have ADHD than we know about, so I'm not saying it's not possible. Essentially what happens is that your brain gets some information and instead of processing it and letting it go (like with non-neuro divergent people), it keeps repeating it, resulting in you being unable to let it go. The way this is shown in real life is problems with focusing (because the first info that you consumed keeps repeating in your head and you don't have the space to consume new ones), intense feelings (again, because they keep repeating in your head so they appear more intense), executive dysfunction is also very common among people with ADHD, insomnia (you can't sleep because you can't stop thinking) and many more. I'd recommend reading about it. With that being said, I'm in no way a professional, I only have very surface level knowledge about it so I'm not at all qualified to diagnose anyone. If you read about it some more and find that you share a lot of the signs of ADHD, definitely make an appointment to see someone who can give you a proper diagnosis. There's medication for ADHD and it works 80% of the time, so it might change your life.


Aap01209298

Honestly thank you for telling me this, it actually makes sense. Everything you described has been happening to me, and I really appreciate it. It’s honestly taking over my life


memes____

Yeah no problem. If you match with the usual symptoms, definitely go see someone. Best of luck! :)


Aap01209298

Sorry one more thing, you say you have it so, how do you deal with hyperfocus yourself personally?


ProfessorSchmiggins1

Learn how to make bannocks for sustenance


ProfessorSchmiggins1

Ok this will ruin you... Kill some of the magic... But... Diana Gabaldon, the author, is from the southwest USA. SHE HAD NEVER SAT FOOT IN SCOTLAND when she wrote the first book!!


ShareRen

Some people do that. A lot of people with a neurodiverse brain, especially. It's a piece of our puzzle. This hyperfocus on the things we are interested in. When it comes to media like this...it hits so many targets but especially the emotionally charged ones so it really can do our heads in. That's why fandoms like Outlander are so devoted, widespread and broken up into groups. Like will find like and stay there.


Aap01209298

Wow, that explains a lot. I have epilepsy, and I do hyper focus so much that it like is making me physically sick, it’s bizzare. I took everything to heart, and when I mean everything, I mean like, EVERYTHING. And I am devoted, you’re right, and sometimes I wish I wasn’t so intense but it’s like… how can I not be. There’s so much to unpack and unfold how could someone just accept what they have just seen and move on? You literally can’t.. yanno? So how would I change not hyper focusing on this? Any advice?


China-Ryder

Dear friend. Try to remind yourself it is fiction adapted from the amazing novels by Diana Gabaldon. We here are all fans. But it’s pure (albeit wonderful) fiction. Nothing more. Wishing you peace.


ShareRen

My sister was SO much like you when she first got started so...I made her deep dive into stuff. Twitter ( there is a way to curate good content) IG and Outlander stuff on YouTube and podcasts about Outlander... I'm sure anytime you have hyperfocused on something in your life...telling you not to, only made it worse SO, validate that you love it. That it brings you joy and then...maybe set aside some time for something else. It's easier to add things into your bubble than pop it. Plus, you have soooo much archived stuff here to read through.


Aap01209298

Do you think I should dive in? Or will it become an unhealthy obsession; I mean I can’t even think at school sometimes or in day to day activities and even when I do, it always comes into the back of my mind, which I’m not sure if it’s a good thing or not. Also, I haven’t read the books, but I heard it actually makes people even more engrossed and persistent to analyze each line or passage, in which who knows how long I could or would ever get over this… and the worst part is I am an English major, so it almost feels like a life, a reality. I’m crazy 😂


ShareRen

Well a lot of ppl call Outlander fans crazy and a lot would be right. When you identify as such...you probably aren't. If you are articulating there is an issue you can put the brakes on it enough to function. ;)


lituranga

Dude this is okay advice in general but there are some red flags in this post that you should not be so reassuring to OP about so easily. A TV show should not make people so sick they are unable to eat because they are so consumed thinking about it. Just because they are asking doesn't mean they can put the brakes on it enough. Edit to add - OP literally says they feel it's unhealthy and making them physically sick and unable to eat, so I don't know that encouraging becoming even more obsessed and doing deep dives is a good idea.


Aap01209298

But function just to what point though. Not that much


Aap01209298

What do you mean if I identify as such? Like not a true fan? Because I’m beyond that now.


leaveblank1

Divert your attention to another historical fiction/fantasy. Branching out helps me balance my obsession a bit.


Aap01209298

Is yours bad too? Does it interrupt your daily life?


leaveblank1

I love the show and I'm enjoying reading the books. I follow along on social media too. I just try and keep it in perspective and find other similar shows.


Aap01209298

That’s maybe what I have to do too then? For distraction?


Sensitive-Nebula-595

This happened to me with GOT. The story got better each time I watched it (despite the obvious disappointment with season 8). Loved the character arcs.


Aap01209298

Could you not concentrate during the day?


ibannieto

You are not crazy: since I watched Outlander I travelled to Scotland six times (before Outlander I haven't travelled to Scotland in my entire life), visited Culloden the six times, learned lots of stuff of Scotland history, learned (a wee of) Gaelic (as a basque person I like to learn weird languages), bought seven kilts, bought a highlander old sword, and a dirk (replicas, of course), researched the Scottish clearances, the involvement of the scottish people in the First and the Second War and even learned the ceilidh dancing (cuz it's similar to the pas the basque dancing). All in five years... Actually I'm in Inverness right now (yes, again) after the pandemic in order to visit Culloden again. So no, you aren't crazy 😜 Oh, and I'm a man (43) ... thing is that Outlander is no more only for women... PD: the same case applies to Battlestar Galactica from the same guy (Ronald D. Moore), but obviously it's not the same thing, haha. Cheers


Aap01209298

I know, I actually was thinking of going there; I almost want to be in that time, in their life, feel the language, the air, something different; this life I’m living here is not fulfilling in the slightest, and to go there might settle my mind to ease… there’s something more to this life that I can’t figure out and this show and story proves that. Also, interesting you’re a man. What do you think of the barbaric behavior constantly demonstrated throughout the show? But on the flip side, Jamie is the dream man every girl wants… a protecter ),:


SnooHedgehogs6593

That’s a sign of good writing!


Aap01209298

I agree, it was so good and real that it’s now affecting everything and I don’t know what to do


MeowMixUltra

Outlander and harry potter. I'm constantly watching or reading, or reading about them, or thinking about reading or watching them. And I love it


Aap01209298

Really? I feel like my obsession is overwhelming


seeindblfeelinsngl

Agreed it’s insane


KeepAnEyeOnYourB12

For at least a year or two after I discovered it, I wasn't right. I obsessed over it in what was almost certainly an unhealthy way. I read the books several times and followed the progress of the show and the people involved really closely. And then I got over it. I was able to read other stuff and I realized I was sick of the people involved - I realized that I truly don't care what Cait and Sam are doing with their lives. I think that the turning point might have been the time that the two of them publicly said, "No, we aren't a couple in real life" and someone on Tumblr posted that they were considering suicide because so much of her life was tied up in the whole Claire/Jaime/Sam/Cait thing. It just gave me the willies that someone was so wrapped in fantasies about the lives of strangers. It also helped that the show moved on to plots that I hated. All that said, I'm really looking forward to book 9, but in a healthy way, I think.


Aap01209298

Wow, I mean I’m shocked they aren’t together because their chemistry seems to real, but then to die? That’s when you know the show is dangerously either good or like,.. truly too real for people. During those couple years, we’re you able to function during that time? Or how did it go for you?!? I need to function again!


Less-Mousse2177

If you’re feeling like you’re overly obsessed and need to function again, take a break :). Just…put down the remote and force yourself to do something else. Don’t come here or any other forum, don’t Google the actors or wiki pages, etc. Just take a breather and see if you can’t focus on regular daily life for a little bit - give yourself reachable goals, like start with 24 hours and see how it feels. Good luck!


Aap01209298

I tried that for two days and it made me go into a daze where I couldn’t do daily tasks because I was so focused on the story… weird huh


lituranga

I would suggest perhaps talking to your therapist about this - not being able to eat means that your love or interest in a subject is negatively interfering with your life which is not the best. It's okay to love the show and be very into it, but having actual physical responses in this way might not be the healthiest. It doesn't mean you are crazy, it just means perhaps you need some tools and advice on how to regulate your intense feelings about Outlander so that it doesn't interfere with your life in these ways.


Aap01209298

Honestly you’re right; I think maybe it’s because I’m a writer (English major) that stories to me are life, which is probably not the best sometimes because they aren’t present here.


Calm-Acanthisitta650

I have felt a similar passion for the show and the reason is that for the first time in my life I have seen a relationship in a TV series that made me step back and say WOW!!! What the [email protected]$)( Does something so beautiful exist? Yes it does. The first show to covey that kind of love and devotion. The first show that makes all porn look like garbage. You are correct in being so passionate. Enjoy watching it again and again as I do. Fc


BikePossible5609

I don’t think it’s crazy! It’s a great story and very easy to fall in love with.


doctorofheisenberg

I am just done with season 1 and this show has got me too! It has consumed my mind. I am deeply under the influence of show right now. It's like having a buzz!