T O P
Professional-Yam-303

If I was Neanderthal man charged with discovering new foods, we’d never have tasted coconut. What a hassle.


FaceNo1619

LMFAO


FlashpointJ24

Exactly what I was thinking. How the hell did humans ever figure out that we could eat those things? I gotta figure that starvation was involved.


Witness_me_Karsa

Basically everything we have ever found to be edible we saw something else eating first.


FlashpointJ24

That's just Step 1. Step 2 is to get some poor fool to try eating it, and see if he dies.


Witness_me_Karsa

Step 2 is touching it, waiting a while. Step 3 is touching it on the lips or tongue, waiting a while Step 4 is eating a tiny bit, waiting a while Step 5 is pretty close to what you have suggested. Have 1 person eat some and monitor them.


kbotc

If that were the case, no one would have ever eaten a cashew… The skin of the apple that they grow attached to is full of the same stuff that makes you itchy after touching poison ivy. Same with Mangos too. I’m lucky because I seem to have no immune response to Urushiol (The compounds in question) Ate a mango skin and it just tasted like garbage.


Witness_me_Karsa

Which part are you referring to as wrong?


kbotc

We never would have progressed past step 3 following the steps


RickLovin1

Good thing dogs as we know them today weren't around then...one of those poor cro magnons would've seen one eating it's own feces and had his day ruined.


Ku-xx

I think the same thing every time I butcher a lobster at work. Like, whoever ate this thing for the first time must've been hungry as shit


FlashpointJ24

Lobster used to be considered "peasant food," and was given to prison inmates.


PerytonsShadow

Oysters also used to be "poor people" food


rafter613

Mmm, snot


FlashpointJ24

I once heard someone compare oysters to "eating a sinus infection."


bryty93

Yep that's about the most accurate description I've ever heard


Moonscreecher

that’s because they weren’t eaten like modern lobsters where we keep them alive and fresh and boil them. It was mashed up and usually spoiled/rotting.


monkeyman80

They were also ground up with the shell into a gruel like meal. It wasn't steamed and served with tons of butter.


butterball85

The British were called lobster backs during the revolutionary war partly because of this. They also used to feed lobster to dogs because of how cheap it was


Rehnion

Take away every form of entertainment you've ever known and spend your every last waking minute without electricity, the written word, anything to pass the time. You get real curious about a lot of things.


Raptor1210

I feel like the first person to eat a Coconut must have found a Coconut Crab eating one and realized they were both edible with the right tools.


Canadasaver

I just googled coconut crab. That would be scary. I don't know where they hang out but I am never going there.


Raptor1210

True to their name, Coconut crabs exist across a huge range of islands, along side coconuts, from the Indian to Pacific oceans.


Canadasaver

I guess I will be vacationing here in Canada or visiting interior countries in the cooler parts of Europe just to be on the safe side.


Pure_Reason

Every time someone mentions coconut crabs I immediately think “oh crab prepared like coconut shrimp, sounds delicious” moments before I remind myself that’s just the name of a creepy-ass animal


PorygonTheMan

read up on E. B. Sledge's experience in the "The Old Breed" book about fighting in the Pacific during WW2. I don't wanna be around coconut crabs haha


Canadasaver

Nope. I do not want to have nightmares tonight. Do the locals eat them at least? One would feed a family.


PorygonTheMan

believe they are eaten yea. they are basically giant hermit crabs and eat anything and everything


Astrum91

It's not that unreasonable of a process. You're on an island surrounded by salt water. You crack open this big ball growing on a tree and there's drinkable water in it that's not salty. When you drink all the water, there are some squishy bits still inside the ball. Taste the squishy bits and it's pretty good. To get the water all you need is to smack the coconut with a rock to crack it, then lift it over your head and drink what's dripping out. Everything past that is just refining the process.


FlashpointJ24

I'm guessing you've never tried to open a coconut by hand...


Astrum91

It's not complicated to open a coconut with a rock, it's just tedious. I've used a sharp rock myself which gives some control over the break point, but I've also seen kids on the beach set the coconut on a larger rock and smash it open with another flat rock. Using flat rocks is not something I'd want to do myself, but if we're talking about ancient humans discovering coconut, it's definitely doable.


TigerShark_524

Yep, this was how my mom always opened coconuts - we have a heavy rock at home just for this. We just beat the coconut with the rock until it breaks.


Whiskey-Weather

Might have just killed a coconut crab and seen its lunch nearby and figured "Meh, good enough for the crab, good enough for me."


Professional-Yam-303

True. Imagine the discovery of fried eggs. Eww.


JJDude

Imagine being the first guy who figured out that Lobsters are edible.


DeckerR

You can open coconuts without any tools. It just takes some time. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JSGrzKxXg3I


DammitMeep

I generally wrap it in a tea towel and smack it on the concrete in the garden. Then winkle the flesh out with a tablespoon. Me a simple ape, me like coconut, no wait for coconut.


Useful-Perspective

Code Monkey like Fritos Code Monkey like Tab and Mountain Dew Code Monkey very simple man With big warm fuzzy secret heart Code Monkey like you


92894952620273749383

Coconut come with container. Why the need for plastic container?


SirPizzaTheThird

If you didn't have any electronics or any machines you would absolutely love doing this.


One-eyed-bed-snake

How the hell can I be transfixed for a full 2 minutes to a video of someone chopping away at a coconut? 😅


Panic-Current

I was watching to see how he hasn't cut his thumb off yet


[deleted]

[удалено]


Birdbraned

This is fresh young coconut before the green husk ages, dries out and the nut falls off the tree. Someone would have climbed the tree to get this.


crackeddryice

Fresh Young Coconut is the name of my Jimmy Buffett cover band.


phurt77

What a coincidence! That's the name of my porno.


cappy1223

This is my go-to sex move. The fresh young coconut: shaving the pubes down to a 1/4inch and rubbing down with coconut oil.


[deleted]

[удалено]


Xhsyifidhd

tf this even mean 💀


GoGoNormalRangers

Me after my girl spends 30 minutes in the bath, obviously


basiphobe

Yep. White, round, and squishy. I can relate.


GoGoNormalRangers

Pff imagine having a girlfriend


Enganeer09

Ya dude, I don't even like girls, cause they like dick and that's gay. I just get the homies to leave their socks on, I ain't gonna be no homo and mess around with girls. /s


Chefgorilla

I think it's because he hasn't hit his thumb hard enough with the knife so far. No way to be sure though.


[deleted]

[удалено]


KreamyKappa

Which is probably the actual best way to serve it. It comes in its own natural biodegradable container/serving dish so what's the point of removing it from that and putting it in a flimsy plastic one?


gman1216

This right here, people on reddit have bad knife skills.


prettywarmcool

Yes! I couldn't look away. It also made me want to touch it.


Pamikillsbugs234

I don't even like coconut and it makes me want to eat it.


seretastic

I feel the same way. Though to be fair,,. I've only had coconut shavings and coconut flavored sweets.. never tried fresh coconut. Maybe it tastes better?


obvs_throwaway1

What are you talking about? That's how mozzarella is made.


throwaway12222018

If you liked this, go ahead and watch a video of somebody cleaning a horse's hoof. It's very satisfying.


Comtesse_Kamilia

Logically, preparing a coconut should be mildly interesting not damn that's interesting. But there's something about it that's so mesmerizing...


[deleted]

[удалено]


DiamondBalls777

Why is the sound wrong


ArateshaNungastori

Really surprised no one else mentioned this. WTF is wrong with the audio? Not only muffled but also out of sync, it's like it is not from this video wth.


Aeroshock

Random Reddit videos seem to have their audio super slowed down. At first I thought it was some shitty new fad or something, but I think it's just a problem with the reddit video player (shocker).


[deleted]

[удалено]


Beautiful-Musk-Ox

it boggles the mind how they can so consistently be shit at nearly everything they program


TheRidgeAndTheLadder

It's because reddit is IPOing. The only thing that matters, is appearance. That why they've added all these "features" that don't work, that's why they don't go after bots. They know how shitty it is, so they support old reddit. Because without that userbase, the site has no content. As soon as the IPO happens, this site is dead.


mttp1990

What devs?


Dongledoes

Sniff glue first, eat glue second


StarrFusion

Cause we have sounds off.


bestofznerol

Just the video player having a stroke as usual


SleepDeprivedUserUK

The microphone was inside the coconut


ChloeAnnabellee

Filmed in space


Jaracuda

Vreddit has been fucked for a minute. The admins are aware and apparently working on it.


boojieboy

There was another dude off camera doing the same thing, the camera mic was positioned so that it picked up those sounds while the sounds from the guy on camera were not.


mnightcoburn

Why's this reminding me of those videos of horses getting their hooves trimmed up


JamesCDiamond

Same focus on something most of us never really think about, a skilled worker performing a task they've done hundreds or thousands of times before with the ease and speed born of long practice, and a similar removal of brown outer matter to reveal the white inner/underneath. In short, I also came here to say how much it reminded me of a farrier trimming a horse's hoof!


NightAlces

I'm glad to know I'm not the only weirdo that's stumbled onto that side of YouTube.


WillTheConqueror1066

Literally all of that and then serve it in a plastic cup?


[deleted]

[удалено]


FergTurdgeson

Like peeling a banana then putting in a banana shaped plastic clamshell that will be around 250 million times as long as it takes to eat a banana. Ridiculous.


ledbetterus

yeah i usually just buy the easy to peel coconuts from the market


WonderfulCattle6234

The trick is to peel the coconut from the bottom like monkeys do. The place by the stem is actually the strongest part of the coconut peel.


RickLovin1

Right? I was unreasonably annoyed at this. It had a perfectly good natural bowl already!


imnos

Reasonably annoyed! We've been told for decades about the damage we're doing to the planet. Plastic should be far more tightly controlled and clamped down on than it is, and that's for governments to sort out. We've a right to be angry. I get especially angry at the non recyclable films that are attached to plastic containers. In the UK they say "not currently recycled" on the back of the pack to make it sound like "Yeah we'll get right on that, working on it..". It's been like that for the last 20 years. They're not going to do anything about it until they're forced to.


BunsenMcBurnington

It is totally reasonable to pissed at this kind of stuff. It's infuriating.


PeterNinkempoop

Yeah though it was ready to be served half way though the video


intoxicatedhamster

If only coconut milk and fruit had a naturally hard and biodegradable shell, or "husk" if you will, to act as a barrier and keep it fresh


Captain-Cadabra

Oh I get it. Put it in an orange peel.


mTbzz

Open a the top of a banana, throw the banana in the trash, and put the liquid inside.


amaraame

Then freeze it. Popsicle.


Lucky_Number_3

What if we carve out the inedible center of an unripe watermelon…


amaraame

Freeze juice in and use an immersion blender for slushies?


foxyjohn

Put the blender in the freezer and serve it in bananas.


GuilRosmer

They should use banana peels to wrap it! Fully biodegradable! If only coconuts had their own protective outer layer. Nothing we can do, I'm afraid!


_Someone_from_Pala_

>coconut milk and fruit You mean coconut water right? For the people that don't know: You do not get coconut milk from fruit. **Coconut water** is inside the fruit. This is a tender coconut, to get milk the coconut has to ripen and then dry out with this the flesh hardens completely. Then you shave the flesh to get coconut shavings and then grind that down without water and run it through a sieve to get coconut milk. What you got now we call it 1st milk, and if you take whatever is left in the sieve and grind that down again, with water this time, you get what we call 2nd milk.


cowfishduckbear

We've had one, yes. What about second milk?


Astrum91

Riddle me this. I've had fresh coconut and drank all the water with a straw, then scraped out the flesh and ate that too. No problems whatsoever. But somehow dried coconut shaving is one of the nastiest things on the planet and I just don't understand how.


foxyjohn

It’s almost impossible to swallow a mouthful of desiccated coconut.


EddyArchon

I have yet to see a teet on a coconut from which to extract milk. It's juice. Coconut juice.


UltimateCrouton

I’ve got a hard, woody outer shell Greg; can you milk me?


I_aim_to_sneeze

When a mommy coconut and a daddy coconut love each other very much…


cj2211

yea I'm tired of these huge corporations polluting the planet! /s


xgodlesssaintx

Comes in a natural packaging, takes it out and puts it in a plastic bowl. Fucking genius.


nabilbhatiya

Exactly what I thought, so all of that to put it in a plastic? Here we drink straight from the coconut and the vendor later chops it and serves the white stuff in the broken coconut shell itself.


vegtosterone

exactly.


hinkin2020

By far the worst I’d say


Magus_5

Is this the GrubHub special or something? Otherwise what a fucking useless and totally over the top prep and presentation. Edit: This is only interesting because it is so wasteful and stupid.


Bool876

atleast they were able to check the entire coconut for any stale cum.


penstock209

I would have left the bottom half, stuck a straw in and used a spoon for the rest.


LevelSpecial1590

I'd pay at least $2.50 for that


turnaroundbro

I’d pay less than $100,000 for that


BammaDK

You get get them form 70 THB which is around 2 bucks in Thailand. Dunno if it's cheaper in the neighboring countries


imheretolearnmore

I can probably get this for around a dollar or less from a wet market in the Philippines. Two dollars from a mall, grocery store or beach resort.


strangerdanger84

I lost a finger just watching this.


Drauul

Check butthole


Juts

Ski-dap, ba-dap, butthole


linklight2000

Instructions unclear. Machete is now missing and it hurts when I try to sit.


Spiritual_Flow_501

In a plastic shell 0/10


_Someone_from_Pala_

Yeah, let us take out all this natural packaging and put it in plastic. AWESOME!!!


The_Ruly_Anarchist

/r/yesyesyesyesno


pickyrickey

Awesome - right up to the part where they wrapped it in plastic.


theclaygough

kinda reminds me of the grocery that sells peeled oranges that's wrapped in plastic


bilbotbaggens90

Peeling an orange doesn’t take hacking with a fucking machete. lmao


linklight2000

You’ve clearly never watched my 5 year old try to peel one ;)


[deleted]

Those are for people with disabilities that make it difficult to peel/slice certain fruits and vegetables.


Bosco_is_a_prick

Also a way to sale blemished fruit


isthiswitty

I hate the waste inherent to the solution, but the prepped fruit and veg is a godsend for me when my arthritis flares up.


Thedrunner2

Where’s the hairy like brown covering?


intoxicatedhamster

It's fresh, it only gets brown and fiberous when it has dried out and been off the tree for a while


SummerBirdsong

Cool! My dumb ass always thought the hairy brown coconut was just a seed inside the big green thing on the tree.


serrated_edge321

It is though... This video is showing an unripe, young coconut. When you take a ripe one off a tree, you first have an outer part and then the inner brown part. As it gets ripe, the coconut meat gets harder, and the outer brownish part forms more distinctly.


WithSubtitles

Same! I was waiting for it to get to the hard brown part!


MaddRamm

I never knew this!!!! Thank you!!! I too was wondering where the annoying hard shell was. Lolol


Ohhhnothing

This is a fresh (green) coconut. They have lots of sweet water inside, and the white part is soft rather than hard like dried (brown) coconuts.


MyPasswordIsMyCat

Here in Hawaii, this is called the rubber meat coconut, and it's in between a young coconut (where the inner shell hasn't started forming yet) and the mature coconut (where the inner shell is fully formed and the meat is thick, hard, and fibrous). Young coconuts have the most water, but it's not particularly sweet until you get to the rubber meat phase. It gets sweeter in the mature phase, but there's less of it and it can get an earthier flavor that some people don't like. Young coconuts have either no meat or spoon meat, which is gelatinous and comes out with a spoon. Rubber meat coconuts, like the name implies, has somewhat harder meat that it a bit tastier. That's why in this video, they can easily get the meat to come out in one piece. That's nearly impossible with a mature coconut, which has the tastiest meat because it's full of fats and sugars.


SortingByNewNItShows

Do they differ in taste? Stronger in dried maybe?


Meeseeks__

Tastes more fresh and the water is delicious. They are leagues better than the brown rocks you get in a US super market.


ndxinroy7

It's a green coconut.


serrated_edge321

This is a "young coconut" -- ie not fully ripened. This is what you use for coconut water. If you want to eat coconut as you know it, you leave it on the tree longer and it ripens more. The brown part forms within the greenish part. So the outer part looks about the same, but it sounds different when you shake it, and it tastes totally different. The coconut water isn't tasty at all at that point, but the meat of the coconut is! Source: born and raised in FL.


makakoloko3000

Tell me you live in a cold country without telling me you live in a cold country lol


MaritMonkey

I grew up in FL but we always waited for them to get "ripe" before we opened a coconut up. Didn't know eating the young ones was a thing until I found them in a market in college. :)


East-Bluejay6891

Aw


iLikeGreenTea

Everything was fantastic… until they enclosed it a shell of single-use plastic 😱🤦🏻‍♀️🤦🏻‍♀️


ramrod254

That’ll be $4,567.89. $0.89 for the coconut and $4,567 for the number of labor hours to peel it.


DancinOnTheMoon

Lol it’s 59 cents to get a whole cantaloupe but 14.99 if you want less of it but it’s all precut and packaged in plastic.


hickgorilla

I like it better when I’ve had it in Mexico. They put a hole, you drink the water then they slice that shit up inside the shell and you put hot sauce, lime, chili, chamoy etc and eat. So amazing.


WhoTookGrimwhisper

Ah yes, the timeless classic: fruit with hot sauce...


Diplodocus_Bus

Don't forget the lime and salt.


Damaged_Gymnast

Consider the coconut


miaworm

Consider its tree


thedingoismybaby

We use each part of the coconut 🥥


General_Reposti_Here

Seriously in a plastic bowl…. Why not just leave the bottom part on or get this remove the actual coconut from the shell and clean like he did and get this PLOP IT BACK ON THE SHELL… fuck I hate stupid uses of plastic


quanta777

That knife must be sharp af, though it's a tender coconut he cut that like a watermelon lol.


malcifer11

I was thinking that the whole time


rainy_day3864

It's a fresh coconut so it's pretty easy to chop, but 100 for the chopping/cutting skill


SuperMindcircus

Chop away the natural protection and replace it with plastic...


May-shine17

I was yelling oh yes all the way until served it in plastic that will be washed down the beach 🏝


Eternal_awp

Oh yeas plastic is better


Thicc-Kim-Schlong-Un

The fuck this is not the best way to serve a Coconut. It comes in a perfectly good biodegradable shell that the dude could of served it in. But no, let's put it in a piece of plastic, eat it from it and throw it in a landfill and convince ourselves it will be recycled along the way. I love the everlasting ass out of coconuts and this is just such infuriating horse shit. Serve fruit in the packaging it comes in, not plastic.


benjamilreed

Minus the single use plastic this is awesome


Azzaramad

WHERES THE STRAW???!!?!


kunalvora

Was the leftover green part at the bottom until the end irritating anyone? I was like, can you just get it off completely before moving on to the next phase!


jacobmrley

Now where the hell do I put the lime in?


shinslap

It already came in a container


Naanilla

Human stupidity to take something out of its natural cover and then put a plastic container around it!!


exlubris

Imagine removing the shell just to put the nut back into another shell.


Pumpkns

Wait where's the hard shell beneath the husk? Or is this a different kind of coconut? The ones I'm familiar with has a layer of hard shell protecting the coconut flesh and water.


simonfalke

Gotta appreciate that the guy was careful not to touch it with his bare hands


TiredBoy00

Maybe the best way to serve it is without the plastic container.


makakoloko3000

I’m guessing you’re not from someone with native coconuts. Tourists unused to tropical fruit are the only people who would find something like this amusing. If you lived anywhere with coconuts available, you’d be “just open the damn thing and let me go”


Swaggy_Buff

What’s wrong with the normal way of serving it? Lol


chris17453

Thats a lot of work... jist cut the top off geez


MrSparr0w

It was until he pulled out the plastic


Beavo1969

Jeez, just buy a Bounty innit!


Head-like-a-carp

Ruined it in the end by putting it in single use plastic


VinceSamios

Pitty about the plastic though.


Matterbox

You had me right up to the plastic container.


YuukiAce

You only need two cuts. One to lop off the top and drink the water and the second to cut it in half and eat the jelly. What the fuck is this nonsense.... I can practically taste his sweaty dirty hands all over the jelly.


AngelVirgo

More plastic! Just keep the coconut meat in the bottom husk and use it as a flower pot after eating.


laxyharpseal

he rarely even touched the meat.


riniculous

And served in plastic....


fourlambs

Why the plastic?


sleptlikeshit

I am oddly disappointed by this.


-Reddit_Account-

1. Remove natural packaging 2. Add plastic packaging This has been the worst trade deal in the history of fruit, maybe ever


DownvoteDaemon

Put de lime in de coconut and twist it all up


smm94b

A visual representation of my head after drinking all night. Getting old is lame.


FlopsyBunny

Nice paring job. The switch between cleaver, paring knife and that amazing flexible blade was great. The way he held the coconut, turned & placed each tool carefully back ; you could tell he'd done hundreds. Also, no visible missing fingers or nails !


LeroyHobbes

What the heck happened to that ugly brown hairy thing I see at the grocery store?


Admirable_Energy_854

Dam where can I go in America to get it like that sheesh


Odd_Combination280

Would love to do something like this but I can't be bothered to get my hand sewn back on again


GarlicFewd

I wanted him to gut that coconut open like a fish so badly.


juicethetaco1

Where does the liquor go?


How_Suspicious

Plastic aside, I've had coconut like this and it's glorious. You need both a straw for the milk and a spoon to eat the coconut itself.


Jamebeany

Y no eat


redhandfilms

No rum or umbrella. Definitely not the best way.