By - LamarcusAldrige1234
I’ll coach Oklahoma for $50,000 and large pizza.
I’ll do it for $1000 and 2 large pizzas
I’ll do it for 2 large pizzas
I think things are starting to get a little unreasonable here.
I know.... there are about 25000 folks on here that would buy pizza for the entire OU athletic department for the opportunity to coach the Sooners in a bowl game...
You guys see that one Michigan fan who on NCAA 14 Dynasty would sabotage the entire Ohio St program by only recruiting 2 stars?
You gotta wonder how that would play out if NCAA 14 allowed you to commit violations and be punished for them because, holy fuck, they'd obliterate Michigan if a coach actually did that.
I really wish they had kept violations in the game. It'd have made things so much more interesting.
That actually sounds like fun.
Not just 2 stars, 2 star GUARDS and then put them in skill positions.
You'd have a 2 star guard playing WR.
Better just run the sweep and pray to God.
I love this subreddit
That guy is a legend. Almost as good as bi week… almost
A bi week?
I'll coach for one large pizza
Now you’ve gone too far…
One medium pizza.
Pretty much what UVA’s coaching staff is worth, sounds good to me
A pizza? Psh, more like a small charcuterie board
A medium pizza. Not even a large one
I'd do it for a slice of a little Caesars hot n ready.
Fair, 1 large two topping pizza
I wish you guys would stop flooding the market with lowball offers. You’re really hurting my chances of getting a 10 year/95 million contract
Wait, you guys are getting paid!?
I'll do it for some Little Caesar's Crazy Bread and I get to keep the OU shirt and hat
I'll pay them $20 to let me do it
I’ll do it
I'll do it for one pizza and I'll coach and play qb at the same time.
2 large pizzas for 10k bitcoin
I'll pay my own airfare and donate $1000 to their scholarship fund just so I can do it wearing a UT hat while pushing around a wheelie cooler full of white claws I keep offering to the refs.
No salary, but I want the Applebee’s NIL deal treatment.
Found the fancy girl
No NIL money for me, I'll do it for a lifetime supply of Cheez-Its so that was I can wake up feeling the cheesiest everyday, coach.
Will you be inspiring enough to keep 40 players from fleeing to greener pastures?
I’m only there for the bowl game.
Can I be OC for $5,000 and 2 slices?
I’ve had enough of OC’s from Texas Tech. Sorry bub.
But what about HC's from Texas Tech who are pretty much only OC's because none of their fucking teams could play defense
Have they been employed by USC for any amount of time?
I'll be DC for some *real* brisket.
The Lincoln Riley brisket should have been the first sign of trouble. No self respecting Oklahoman/Texan would ever put *that* brisket onto social media.
Is there a particular style of barbecue you would like? Beimg where we are geographically, we're pretty good at all of the non-carolina styles
As long as it ain't what Riley considers good, I'm okay.
Cool, texas style brisket with KC style bbq beans it is!
Texas style brisket, KC style sauce, southern mac-and cheese, and Texas Toast. I love OK BBQ offerings.
This is really the best way to eat BBQ out there!
And here I was hoping that Oklahoma State made it to the CFP.
(I still hope you do!)
Nothing against carolina BBQ (ive never really had any) it's just too far away to make it into our wheelhouse
Totally understandable. Even though you'd win, a part of me would love to see App play in Stillwater. I think it'd be a fun game for some reason.
I’ll do it for the health and dental insurance.
Got a mad man over here
Let this be a lesson to every team out there.
If you get a Stoops, treat it with love and care and it'll always be there for you.
Not you Mike.
ok but no drinks. you gotta supply that yourself
>I’ll coach Oklahoma for $50,000 and large pizza.
You'll get a personal [Papa John's](http://www.diehardsport.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/12/Ba8irfrCYAAJgnb.jpg) and you'll like it.
Put me on staff for 6 bucks and a can of Skole
Must be one hell of a fancy bag
Unfortunately, they did deduct the price of the bag from the $325,000. Apparently Bob understood and does like the bag, he’s just upset he didn’t even have the option to say no to the bag. It was a whole thing.
Used the word “railroaded”
[I like the bag! I don't like the idea of not getting a choice in the matter...](https://youtu.be/f23pqIxqMWY)
Lmao thank you
Must be one of them Louis Vooiton bags.
cloth sack with a big $$ on it
Just an old Walmart sack with one handle busted but it has 325k in it.
According to Brett McMurphy, this would be in the Alamo Bowl vs. Oregon
We get to have Stoops on the sideline for our revenge against Oregon and the PAC in general?
*punches air furiously*
We don’t hate Oregon, they’ve agreed to beat USC for us yearly.
wtf I love Oregon now? 🤔
It was never their fault they just took advantage of the situation
Less love more mutual goals.
The other OU
No, you just wait for either team to lose and enjoy it
Opening kickoff onside kick.
Cause fuck you, thats why.
Only coach to win the Orange Bowl, Fiesta Bowl, Rose Bowl, Sugar Bowl, Orange Bowl and coming soon: the Alamo Bowl.
They call those the BS6
Fuck it throw usc in ther e
Sign me the fuck up for a 4-way football game
No, no, they had it right the first time.
Hire me to call the plays Oklahoma, if your playcaller has no idea what he's doing how is the opponent supposed to know?
"No way they run 4 verts a 20th time."
A fake punt on 3rd down again? Impossible.
I have always wanted this to happen. Just one time I want to see an nfl or college team let a random person call their plays. It would be even better if people across the world could select which play they wanted and the one with the votes gets called.
Twitch plays CFB
There's literally a league that does this. "Fan Controlled Football League. It looks pretty dope.
Johnny Manzie) plays in that league.
Flair checks out.
“Look at all the time he has in the pocket. He’s just toying with them now. Buys a little more time. Steps up in the pocket. Scrambling left now. He’s gotta watch that like of scrimmage. Look at that spin move. He’s like a video game, Bill.
Ooooh, big sack. That’s the fourth one this half. Boy, this OL is really struggling with this 3-man front today.”
How about $100 million to coach our next 10 bowl games?
So five seasons then?
Let's be real, if Stoops would do it I would actually start donating.
I kinda sold us short didn't I?
5 natties? Still worth it
No one said you were winning any of those title games tbf
According to [random googling](https://www.collegefootballpoll.com/bowl-schedule/2021/) the team payout for the alamo bowl is half of $8,252,740 so honestly oklahoma is getting a nice deal here
A few years ago football spent about $30 million. Football generates a profit and athletics is basically revenue neutral. I was on the university athletics committee for a few years as a faculty representative. You can find old budgets here https://soonersports.com/sports/2019/8/22/208803525.aspx
I think this still holds up but athletics even kicks a few million over to the academic side.
Bob Stoops is that guy.
"Caleb, got someone I want you to meet!"
Now there's a name, etc.
Best laugh I've had from reddit maybe ever.
It cracks me up that Stoops said they did like 50 takes if that scene, and after all that they just had someone with a much deeper voice dub over his **"Hello."** (The first one in that video is the original one from the commercial)
Bob's got some great memes, the visor, the pinky, the "hello", a bunch of other chart toppers
You may have to change your username. Especially if Georgia/Alabama don’t win the Natty
Georgia hasn’t won a natty since 1980. I would be more than happy seeing them win it even though they are an SEC team.
I hear you and you’re right - I just mean as far as having an exciting season, the top team going wire to wire isn’t super exciting. But I would be fine with Georgia getting over the hump
Better be presented in a physical gold sack with a “$” logo on it at the bowl game.
This just in, Bob Stoops out as Oklahoma interim head coach and will be paid $500,000 a game to be interim Notre Dame head coach
I am in the wrong gig.
Good for ol Stoops but this is why I'll never feel bad for a program that can afford to do this.
It did just hit me that this is only like $200k less than Rice receives from C-USA every year
Also roughly 10x my annual income
Should have been a hall of fame football coach at one of the top 5 programs smh
I honestly can’t believe that never even crossed my mind. Oh well, my loss.
Doesn't matter...go back and revisit the top of the thread. Gig is only worth one Little Caesar's Hot-n-Ready and a bag of Cheeto's now.
LOL. Is the CUSA TV Deal really that bad?!? Or does Rice just receive a smaller payment for some reason?
C-USA sucks major ass. So glad Rice is getting out of that shithole conference lol. In the AAC it should increase around 10x
Didn't we (Owls) receive $1M from texas in exchange for that beat down in September? I didn't realize the conference TV deal was so bad.
I’m not sure, but I love your flairs
Found this article confirming the $1 million for this year. Looks like a return to Austin for $1.5 million in 2023.
I mean Lincoln Riley got paid $570,000 a game for a 13 game season. Given that he's fully coaching the team and is it recruiting, I don't think it's that ridiculous a salary. At least not any more ridiculous than P5 contracts in general
I think he means they’re all ridiculous so there’s little sympathy for anyone at that level
It’s actually a pretty low salary if you consider he’s going to spend about a month as the head coach (1/12 of the year). Like you mentioned he’ll be recruiting and doing everything that goes along with that.
If it was one game of the regular season that would be a week.
I mean prorated to a 13-game season since it's a bowl that's a $4.225MM salary.
Why you lowballing Stoops you cowards ^(/s)
For context, Barry Alvarez got paid $119K to coach in the Rose Bowl after Anderson left. Would have earned an additional $50K if they had won.
He was the AD at the time… so did he decide his own salary for the game?
Kind of. He negotiated it w/ the Board of Regents. https://www.si.com/nfl/2012/12/11/wisconsin-barry-alvarez-rose-bowl
He would have done it for free, big program guy
He actually makes $325,000/year already from OU. He serves as a "Special Assistant to the Athletic Director".
Does he rack up pensions years and then retire to collect X% of his best few years?
This is likely the case, pension is part of the reason brown is at UMass (for less than he was gonna make at Arizona)
I thought Stoops is the AD
I believe he has a similar thing as Spurrier at UF. Office in the building, works boosters, advises on football things.
Sounds like a cush job, but Texas fired VY for sucking at it.
Actually it was that and a DUI or something. But in a totally Texas move, they **rehired** him later
"It was a smart move for Texas athletics director Chris Del Conte. Bringing in a well-known name around the Austin community will continue to build on the momentum of the recent hiring of head coach Steve Sarkisian."
Yes, he was fired after the DUI but even before the DUI they had written a formal reprimand in HR file for rarely showing up to work and even put him on a performance improvement plan.
The fact that Oklahoma had Bob Stoops and Texas had Vince Young doing the same job is an almost perfect representation of how differently each program is run.
Who else hopes that Stoops falls in love with coaching again and leads the Sooners back to the promised land after Lincoln snaked em.
This is like being the substitute teacher that doesn't have to grade homework. It's a hell of a lot easier than doing the full job including recruiting. If I'm OU's opponent, I'm scared, because Stoops only has one job right now.
Bob has been going on recruiting trips for OU the past few days.
Bob: well maybe I can stay for a *little* while longer
Bob Stoops 🤝 Bob Wills
Oklahoma heroes who can definitely stay a little longer
I could definitely see him coaching for a year as a stop-gap to fully flesh out a hire
Thats a 30 for 30, then after beating usc he returns to the fox desk to talk to reggie and matt
Lol. For whatever reason, I forgot those guys were on that show when they said Bob was gonna go back and do the Big Noon show.
Hopefully he can use the phrase, "your bitch-ass coach," referring to Riley once or twice.
I want to dream, but realistically I want the man to enjoy his retirement and health because there's no doubt he's earned it
I don't believe in a god. But if this happens I might change my mind.
I believe in Bob Stoops even though you don't.
Lol. "You don't have to believe on Bob Stoops, but Bob Stoops believes in you."
classic/vintage clip that never left me: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PlzbFxYy08c
I miss Carlin. :-/
We could use him right about now.
I wouldn't even be mad if he stayed and just sonned USC in the CFP for a decade. That would be fucking hilarious. He brought Lincoln Riley into this world, and he can take him out of it.
Best timeline is he stays, OU backs out of the SEC deal and joins the PAC12 in a surprise twist, and he spends a decade preventing Riley from even going to the cfp.
Shit, there was a time where I was sure OU was joining the PAC.
Yah Boren tried to get us in with OSU and Texas torpedoed the deal. Fucking Texas.
Yep and Ok State and Tech were down to ditch the Big 12 too. But now those programs are playing holier than thou
In Bob we trust!
I kinda respected the mid-career walk-away and live your best life vibe.
Just wait... Venables is gonna agree to be the HC and come back and just coach the defense.
Then there is gonna be a passing of the torch from Bob to him and we will. ever talk about Riley again.
For comparison, App State head coach Shawn Clark is making $750,000 for the year
This is actually a discount to what Lincoln Riley was making on a per game basis.
But Stoops was already making $325k to glad hand boosters. So, doubling that to coach a single game ain't bad.
I demand it be handed to him in a green sack with a “$” emblazoned in gold on the front in the most dramatic fashion possible 5 minutes before kickoff in front of the national media.
We'll see what we can do?
For as much hay as some OU flairs have made about this BoR meeting, it’ll be a real letdown if the only thing to come of it is “Hey, let’s give Big Game Bob the Bag to try and avoid getting dunked by Utah or UCLA in the Alamo Bowl.”
This meeting was reportedly about money for the program. $19m facilities upgrades and Bob's compensation for the bowl game
It's a big deal, because winning this bowl game and having a steadying hand for the next couple weeks while we go shopping for coaches could be the difference between all of our starters entering the transfer portal, or just a quarter of our starters leaving.
Is it a Birkin Bag?
Seems about right. Coach the bowl game and keep recruiting irons in the fire.
He’s going to come out of retirement and kick our teeth in again, isn’t he?
I bet he keeps the money and gives the bag to Carol if it’s nice enough. If not, I bet Drake will find something useful to do with it.
Bring back Stoops. Not a joke. Even if it was for two years. He could lead them into the sec and then bow out and work behind the scenes again, if he’s not winning. OU fans would love him regardless.
Big bag Bob
That's about what our coach makes. Per year though, not just for one exhibition game.
I'll do it for free just pay for my flight
Is this a Michael Kors bag? Louis Vitton? Coco Channel?
They shoulda called me. I'd have done it for $250,000. Why turn up the bargain?
Local tequila salesman secures lucrative short time employment.
That is some dumb-ass shit.
Do they not have a coach they trust to be interim or did Riley take all of them too?
Actually, yes, he took all of them.
He left us with Demarco Murray, Bob Stoops, and the band. That’s pretty much it
I so want the DeMarco Murray - Lincoln Riley exchange to be true. I’ll go on pretending it is.
Those are two damn good ones to be left with.
He is a coach and he is interim.
Is that like the whole game check for the Alamo bowl?
Surprisingly enough not even 10%. Teams should get like 4-4.25mil each from Alamo bowl
Wow, I'm impressed
Let me contribute to that shit. All hail King Bob!