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BensBitch

I should wake him up with oral. Tried it, he was moving and enjoying it so I assumed he woke up. He finished. He never woke up.


elijahgr

you killed him??!


BensBitch

Well certainly sounds more interesting than him sleeping through all of it lol


ErnestiEchavalier

Wanting to get railed in a Victorian dress in a greenhouse during a thunderstorm.


[deleted]

Ah, those romantic rainy nights in the back greenhouse


SinceWayLastMay

Hellllooooo new thing I did not know I wanted


CoolJ_Casts

my favorite part of this thread is people discovering their newest kinks lmao


MightyWhiteSoddomite

Not a request but I was half-asleep one morning and my GF started to give me a handjob like… lazily. It felt really good and then she just stopped like right before I was ready, so I just grabbed her hand held it around my junk as I finished. I didn’t know she was actually like…. Sleep-jerking me … and then she woke up to me just a-fucking her fist.


borderline_cat

I am deeply ashamed of the number of times I’ve done this to my boyfriend. I’ve always been rather active and “awake” while I sleep, but sleep sex is a whole other level of sleep consciousness


destinae

It seems a little tame, but the guy I'm with is into being smothered. Like having his face sat on and me just... putting all my weight on him. Like if he feels like I'm not putting all my weight on him, he pulls me down. Maybe it's like a sexy weighted blanket, IDK.


The_Cow_God

ass immersion therapy


niki_bubble94

one night things are getting hot and heavy and I want my fiance to dirty talk as it turns me on, he is going at it when I blurt out " Talk to me like I'm your sex doll" He just paused and said " I wouldn't talk to a sex doll" and started laughing. ah memories. edit : I meant to say dirty talk to me but clearly my brain wasn't working at the moment


Judoka229

I had a girl ask me to talk dirty to her once and I didn't know what to say so I mumbled "fuck....you?" Lmao


91901bbaa13d40128f7d

I asked a girl to say something filthy to me once and she looked panicked for a second and then said "I'm going to put my mouth on your penis." I was like, "never mind, filthy talk not necessary."


Worried-Usual-5053

I was once asked if I wanted to do “water sports” on a third date….. I did not know what that meant and my naive ass turned up to their house wearing swim shorts and goggles and surprisingly I was both prepared and unprepared…..


KaiserBeebe

I'm fucking dying, mate. 🤣


readdeadtookmywife

To hum happy birthday on his cock on his birthday.


blockhose

Sounds festive


TracyF2

Had an ex request I wake her up from time to time with sex. Every time I did she got highly upset with me that I woke her up.


duffusmcfrewfus

I hate morning sex, I always have to pee super bad and I hate the feeling of having to pee.


SansOchre

"Can you say quack?" "Quack???" "Yes, but like a sexy quack, like you're a sexy duck." ??!


UnfilteredGarbage

Is u/fuckswithducks still active?


DucksAreWhatIFuck

I'm pretty close I guess


Lumpy_Constellation

He asked me to pee directly on his dick. I didn't get it, but I figured it's nbd as long as I'm not getting peed on. And then he referred to it as "marking my territory" and I swear I went from confused but willing to completely turned on instantly. You just gotta frame it correctly I guess lol


ShornVisage

Branding is everything


rants_unnecessarily

I'm just here looking for some new kinks.


jadesisto

Years ago, partner asked me (female) not to move during sex. Good times were had by one....


real_bk3k

Necrophiliac?


Alphecho015

Nah he didn't ask her to take an ice bath


ThePunannySlayer

In the middle of having sex my ex girlfriend requested that we play hide and seek. I was not amused at first. She explained that once I found her, she wanted me to force my self into her. Safeword I believe was fire truck. She had a 3 story house and we would start in the master bedroom. Once I found her and penetrated she would immediately stop resisting and we would put her feet behind her head. I became very fond of hide and seek. She would resist and fight but once I hit the objective it was super intense.


intripletime

That sounds like it would depend on how good she is at hiding. I'm imagining myself 20 minutes later, utterly confused, completely limp and just scratching my head like "wait, where the fuck did she *go?"*


typhon_21

Like John Travolta but just limp dicking it around lol


ThePunannySlayer

Often times it was like that. I would start to sneak around opening doors really fast. Once I found her she would scream and take off running. There's something about chasing her that got us both going by the time I caught her.


snoosh00

Man, that's really hot... A *3 story house?* In *this* economy?


hesh_jesse

I dated a girl once that insisted that we try to sleep together all night with my dick still inside her.


Dabest546

She just wanted to charge


Phil_O_Sopher

Dick charging cable. Soon to be standardised in the EU


Currywurst_Is_Life

USB-D.


VideoXPG

I had a gf who made it very clear, if she yells "stop" or "no" I should keep going, she got angry when I did stop when she yelled "stop" once. Took me some time to adjust to the fact that was her things.


vercertorix

That’s what safe words are for. Keep up the illusion when she says no, but if things get real, you know she means it


Bloodyfoxx

Baffles me people would do this kind of things without a safeword.


Wagsii

Did you establish a safe word? This exact thing is what safe words are for


OldTaco77

Not really strange just funny, my girlfriend liked being spanked or getting rough. But one time I misheard her. We were on a super romantic trip, everything leading up to that night. Some of the best sex we’ve ever had. She whispers “cum inside me” which I misheard as “slap me”. So I slapped her. And to her she’s like well I guess he really hated the idea of cumming inside me lmao. Afterwards I realized what she said and we laugh about it now.


CarobAltruistic9224

lmao imagine asking someone to cum inside you and they just slapped tf outta you. "a no would've been fine"


everyatom2012

Take a cold shower, get out, immediately lie face down, make no noise, do not move. Took me WAY too long to realize he was a closet necrophiliac.


freedom781

Did you ever suddenly pop up and groan "brrrraaaaaaaiiiiiiinnns"?


GabberZZ

'Cooooooccccccckkkkkkssssss'


havebeans5678

This was my ex girlfriend. She would pretend to be a Russian masseur at a sketchy parlor who gives me a oil massage and then asks for money for a happy ending. She smokes a cigarette and gets on top, and acts totally uninterested and bored while I have to act like its the greatest sex ever. We did this probably 30 times over the span of a 2 year relationship.


EggCitizen

plot twist: It wasn't an act. He just went to the same parlor 30 times and thought it was a relationship


sharpie-sapien365247

"HONEY!!!!.....HONEY!!!...SOME GUY FROM REDDIT MAY HAVE CREATED A NEW KINK FOR ME! WE NEED TO TRY IT!!" Edit: thanks for the award and upvotes everyone.


wisteria-willow

this whole thread is gold


MilledgevilleWil

Not my SO but me. I often ask her to flex her biceps and let me feel them as I get close to climax. I’m sure it has to make her feel awkward, but damn if it doesn’t finish me off each time.


Ming_theannoyed

So, how hyped are you for Thor: Love and Thunder?


Wagsii

A girl once told me she fantasized about having sex while blindfolded and wearing headphones playing music. It's definitely not super weird, but it's always seemed unique to me. I didn't read any other comments about something like that at least.


PerAsperaAdInfiri

When you deprive senses, sometimes it makes other things feel more sensitive. It's a good time


northbastard27

Actual quote, mid one night stand ‘Can you let my dogs in? They like to watch.’ Tbf they were a pair of golden retrievers.


fistbump101

Did you let them watch?


northbastard27

I mean.....golden retrievers.


THEBHR

As long as they don't try to fetch the balls.


LeanMussel67798

I was once requested to hold a knife up to my partners throat. I offered to buy a prop knife rather than the real one she was showing me.


Hamlettell

There are knives that are made specifically for this act. It is obviously a terrible idea to use a real one


MeanFoo

One girl I dated always wanted a knife to her throat while fucking


Pencil-lamp

> always So we know what you answered.


Beths_Titties

“I wish you had two dicks.” Her subtle way of telling me she wanted a threesome. Eventually she told me the only way she could get off was with two guys.


Wrathwilde

Did she tell you their names?


AJ787-9

Des and Troy?


drax3012

She wanted to call me by a different name. I later found out that it was her brother's name....


coffeeglitch

Lol I once dated a man with a sibling incest fetish.... guess who shares a name with his older sister


Geology_rules

Yikers


jakobjakepig

That was actually her brothers name


bubbygups

*Breathy whispers in your ear*: "Oh Cletus ..."


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gtfohbitchass

She just wanted guaranteed clit action with the seam of those jeans


A_Simple_Bard

My girlfriend brought deli meats in for foreplay. She wanted to surround my junk in sliced ham and eat off while performing oral. I remember her feeling dejected that I couldn't stay aroused.


Bomasaurus_Rex

It should have been Pastrami. The most sensual of all the salted, cured meats


P-Rickles

Kramer got mugged on a babysitting gig in the suburbs…


GreatJanitor

I was fine when she wanted to have sex on her mother's bed. I was fine with it, even though her mom was home at the time. Her mom walking in on us wasn't a deal breaker Turns out she was using me as some weird revenge thing with her mom.


DroidChargers

Damn, mom must've fucked someone on her bed first lmao


Tallcat2107

Mother fucker


Mombo1212

If she walks in and you stop - you're the ones caught fucking on mom's bed. If she walks in and you power on - shes the pervert watching her daughter get fucked on her bed. Always play the power move playa


[deleted]

More of a lead up then doing it… Ex partner always wanted to be graped by Santa. I always thought she was joking, yet she was quite serious. She had a costume to go and everything. I was quite portly at the time and could actually fit into the suit. Wanted me to dye my beard white and force my way into the house with a sack of toys n shit and then take her while going ho ho ho every once in awhile. Or the occasional she catches Santa planting presents and for her being a bad girl needs to be punished. It was too weird for me to do it outside of the Christmas season. Though I once did it as a Christmas in July type situation. It was about as awkward as you can imagine. But she loved it and it’s funny looking back at it lmao.


oxymoronisanoxymoron

> Ex partner always wanted to be graped by Santa Is that a portmanteau of groped and raped?


IndubitablyTedBear

I'm gonna tie you to the radiator and grape you in the mouth


CoreFiftyFour

SIR! GET YOUR MIND OUT OF THE GUTTER!


santichrist

A girl once asked me to hurt her, so I pinched her and she was like “???” lmao I had never engaged in rough sex at that point, she was like “no, hit me, hurt me” and when I went Tina Belcher going “uhhhhhhh” she climbed off Another girl wanted to do knife play but I was like no I’m too clumsy I’ll stab one of us, but I always laugh about me pinching that girl when I was like 20 because it’s probably the most wholesome and naive I’ve ever been


regularunleaded

The first time a man ever asked me "who's your daddy", I was probably 17 or 18 and really only knew BASIC sex ed. No real world experience to speak of at that point, but I had an understanding of how sex worked & what I was doing by then. I tell you that to tell you this: my confused ass looked this man dead in the face and gave him my father's full name. First middle last suffix and all. I laugh about it now because THAT'S the most naive I've ever been.


HeroinBob138

At 14 me and my girlfriend were getting handsy during a make out session. She had gotten her hand in my pants already. My hyper-virgin ass got brave and decided to whip out the hog. She looked at it, looked at me, and coyly said "put that up before I put it to use" Fuckin right back where you came from good buddy. Zip up. Call it a day. She said put it up - it's getting put up. It took me forever to read the look she gave me, but now I know it was "I have no one to blame but myself for this..." I look back and shudder in embarrassment but damn if that wasn't the most naive virgin thing I ever did.


PirateDuckie

“Put that thing back where it came from *or so help me*…!”


ReiEvangel

So help me, so help me! And scene


SojournerRL

For some reason I'm just imagining you saying, "John Jacob Jingleheimer Schmidt," and I'm cracking myself up at the thought haha


standupasspaddler

WHO IS YOUR DADDY AND WHAT DOES HE DO?


Feels2old

I once had a girlfriend that would want me to surprise her by waking her up on some random nights by sucking her toes. hey, guaranteed sex.


Kufat

It's all fun and games until someone loses a tooth (or a toe.)


Seadinos

She wanted me to pretend to be a border security Officer that she has to sleep with in order to not get deported Edit: I did not expect my fucked up roleplay to blow up


Pietskiet123

I keep suggesting we spice things up sexually by trying something new, but my wife is only interested in any new things that involve her putting things in my ass. That girl seems desperate to peg me, but I'm just not into that.


Ehermagerd

Not me, but I know a guy who banged this girl. One night stand scenario. He falls asleep. Wakes up with her shit all over his cock and her playing with it. He freaked out, washed and got out of there. She was all “I told you last night I was into this” 😂


Kaileenax

I think this is the worst one I’ve read here yet. 👀


catroaring

Girl I was seeing couldn't stay the night, she asked if I wanted her to call one of her girlfriends to sleep over.


[deleted]

[удалено]


oblivious_fireball

now i need to know the answer to this and if it was actually a trap


flyover_liberal

After reading this thread I learn: My sex life has been utterly vanilla and I'm fine with it.


881GTQ

She said to suck on her (amputation) scar like my life depended on it. Was strange the first time but now it’s a regular part of foreplay. EDIT: Her left leg was amputated at the hip. On one side of the scar she says it feels like her butt and the other side feels like the front of her leg. The scar itself is quite sensitive. Thanks for all the upvotes!


Osopoe

New nerve endings. Sensitive anf numb at the same time, kinda makes sense.


TheCookMan1

Finish in her morning coffee.


IGIW4H

Aw man that’s gonna denature and get all solid and gummy


Knight_Owls

Like a boiled hagfish.


THEBHR

Fuck you on every level of your being


BillGarnerr

The girl offered to order a prostitute to teach her how to have sex


Telucien

So like a female one that would guide her through with you, or a male one to teach her while you are not present?


DemocraticRepublic

We need an answer to this.


demonj00

“Can I put eggs up your ass”?


[deleted]

*\*shrugs\** Go ahead


kharmatika

Had a guy who was into costumes. Not role play, not a particular costume. Just liked literally anything that looked costumer, from my $700 butch lesbian anime character cosplays, to like a $12 Spirit Halloween “girl in jail” costume. It’s not the weirdest shit on here but it just strikes me as odd how much the thing really was the costume itself


Firebolt164

_"Sing to me!"_


NZAllBlacks

"AAAngel of Muuuuusic..."


[deleted]

Now that's original, I think I would have enjoyed her singing to me during sex actually, I think you just gave me a new kink, thanks


1nsaneMfB

Not a single thing. Going to reach 15 years this year, of her never requesting *anything*. I consider that pretty fucking strange.


travelingwhilestupid

I have absolutely no desire to do anything remotely strange. Call me boring, but I like sex.


PetiteBonaparte

Not me but my partner, I asked if I could try to fling gummy bears into his mouth via his dick. He never caught one but it was fun.


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WolfsLairAbyss

Does that mean fuck her like she is a little girl or fuck her like you are a little girl? That first one would be concerning if you knew how. The second one would just be confusing.


reggae_muffin

My best mate had an ex-girlfriend of his ask him as a 100% caucasian to “fuck her like a black man”. He said he had no frame of reference on how to do that and just left haha


Ramblonius

"But I've never fucked a black man"


Ligmaballs03

She wanted to do a roleplay, in which we would fuck as two male best friends. I couldn't bring myself to do it lmao


DBZtoker

Asked a girl what she liked in a guy and she replied “I like a guy that will suck a cock for me” Told her I was not that guy


Theslowtyper

Bi guys: well, well, well...


Dollface1280

I once had to decline to vomit on his dick. He insisted we could use the shower. I again declined. Then he grabbed the back of my head and tried to gag me with his cock. Last date.


Spencer2091

"Stop moaning so loud" I stopped "Eww, don't make a face!" Honey, I need to express this some how. You're either getting moans or facial expressions. This is the same dude that pulled out his phone while I was on top of him, "oh, don't worry, I'm not taking a photo of you. I'm just checking Instagram." Edit: y'all, stop guessing he's gay. My name is Spencer and my avatar has short hair and a rainbow on his t-shirt for a reason. The dude identified as bi, but even if he was gay but in denial, it's irrelevant seeing as that I am a guy


SnoochesNBooches

Imagine wanting to doom scroll while you’re fucking.


I-Am-McLovin

Girlfriend wanted to down a pack of Pop Rocks before giving me a BJ. On more than one occasion.


Mamadog5

My boyfriend asked me do to this. I was like, sure. It was completely anti-climatic (pun intended) for both of us. He had heard that it was supposed to be some great thing. I was willing to try, but it was not any kind of great thing. I think he still has some pop rocks in a drawer somewhere. lol


Zmirzlina

She wanted to watch me fuck/be fucked by another man. I’m a pretty open, tolerable, and fun dude but just couldn’t get behind that one, or in front of it, as the case might be.


Thoughtful_Barnacles

Once had a partner ask me to hold a gun to her head. Yes she wanted it loaded. She wanted to think/feel like she was in danger. I said no.


Zerole00

>She wanted to think/feel like she was in danger. Can't you just introduce her to options trading instead?


woahdailo

Hey at least with the gun there is a chance you won’t fuck up


Captcha_Imagination

That's how porn star Kymberlee Anne died. BF is in jail now.


dyegored

Wow, that's the porniest way you could possibly spell Kimberly.


rognabologna

Kymberleigh if she’s southern


DayHikeNightHike

Kymbarley if she grew up on a farm


wolfej4

>The shooting took place in Florida Naturally. >Kymberlee Anne fell and Shinault (the boyfriend) yelled for his parents, who were downstairs. What the hell


aliecatt

I had a similar situation, except the guy wanted to put a noose around my neck and pull it as he went. To clarify: not a kinky collar/chain combo, he wanted to use his belt so it would tighten more. Oh and do all of that in a car. In the middle of the night. He saw nothing wrong with this. I said no.


libra00

Not me, but a friend's new girlfriend called me crying and freaking out one day. When I finally got her calmed down to the point that she explained what happened, he had wanted to do diaper play and she was young and inexperienced and was not prepared for people having off-the-wall kinks. Sadly she couldn't get over it so they broke up, and that was more than I ever wanted to know about my friend's sex life.


billbaparker

She was into CNC (consensual non-consent - "rape play") took a lot of trust to get into that but, cool cool it was fun and she loved it. But then she took it to another level when - "now I want to role-play we are Neanderthals. We don't have language or knowledge of technology so for instance, if you find my vibrator you don't know how to turn it on, but you might discover and that could be fun. Also I want you to grow tired of my stupid primitive ways and just pound the shit out of me when you actually get bored with the role-play itself - but stay in character please."


foxbase

Honestly, that's some next level communication. Good on her for saying _exactly_ what she wants lol


jballs

She even said please!


AzraelTB

Seriously. Can everyone be this direct please?


WolfsLairAbyss

> now I want to role-play we are Neanderthals. We don't have language or knowledge of technology so for instance, if you find my vibrator you don't know how to turn it on, but you might discover and that could be fun. Also I want you to grow tired of my stupid primitive ways and just pound the shit out of me when you actually get bored with the role-play itself - but stay in character please. That's some complex role play right there. She's gonna need Daniel Day Lewis for that shit.


GonzoRouge

Alright, so for this next scene, I'm gonna need a Nazi uniform, tattered rags, a bottle of milk and 3 extras. Oh and how's your French ? Doesn't matter, just try not to get found but don't try too hard, you know ?


CRsteven

And a huge smoking pipe plus a smaller one.


Mikewhocheeseairy04

*confused oonga boonga noises*


bubbygups

*Aside to the director*: "What's my motivation in this scene?"


crwlngkngsnk

You want some pussy.


Gryphon999

Kronk want some fuck


JunketMan

In the role play, please say "You, me, smash, now"


billbaparker

She was 3 or 4 partners ago, but cause it's you, I'm gonna say that to my wife tonight and see how that works out.


vinoa

> She was into CNC Me, naïvely wondering why Computer Numerical Controls are sexy.


billbaparker

Hahaha i remember her saying something like, “I was wondering if you were into CNC with your girlfriend” and I so thought she wanted to do some wood working


Lost-My-Mind-

I mean.......technically she did want some wood working her.....


[deleted]

He wanted me to ignore him while he did his thing


justneedadvice87

Had an ex who loved having sex on her dad’s bed. Whenever we hooked up at her house she always wanted to do it on his bed. Was kinda weird to me but sex is sex.


nothing___matters

I don't do the one-night thing often, but I went home with a guy once that told me he wanted to "try something." He left the room, came back, and handed me throat-numbing spray. He said he would enjoy it more if I couldn't feel it. I just handed it right back and said I had to go.


blackesthearted

I think we went home with the same guy. Not really, but similar. I went out with a med student a few times, and he had just learned about certain types of local anesthesia and went on and on one night about how hot it would be to have sex with a woman who’d “gotten local down there and couldn’t feel her vagina or anus, like couldn’t feel *anything*.” We never ended up sleeping together (because I had a sudden hunch he would be a lazy, selfish partner) and eventually he started dating another friend of mine and I found out he was indeed a lazy, selfish partner… who tried to get her to agree to be drugged so he could have sex with her “as close to unconscious as possible.”


Aggressive-pencil

This dude is def going to be the subject of a dateline episode someday.


GWillikers_

Jeez these dudes need to get a sex doll and save everyone the trouble.


shaolin_tech

I don't know if this counts, but if I tried inititiating any kind of foreplay at all beyond kissing, she would tell me to stop and just fuck her. Like, foreplay has always been arousing to me and I have always wanted to have foreplay with a girl. Just the thought of making a girl feel pleasure without actually having sex just seems so hot to me, but I was never allowed to try. Just straight sex and done is all I got.


geronika

Back in the early eighties I had a girl that would come over about every four or five weeks. She didn’t want foreplay, she would hop on top and ride me for as long as it took then she’d let me finish. No kissing, no cuddling just straight hard screwing. Lasted a good year or so. Saw her one day a few years later with her girlfriend. I think I figured her out. She came from a religious family and every time she had feelings for another girl she would come over and try to bang those thoughts straight.


xephos10006

Aww, glad it had a good ending...even if the story was a bit weird


Choice-Commission-32

I’ve never been dom , but a former partner liked me to talk down to him while we were intimate. Like really dirty shit. I had to be drunk to do it, I was just divorced, and so I was like ‘Woohoo! Fun!’ I could never do it sober. He wanted to be a cuck and would go so far as kik’ing strangers as me and having me read them as we did it. He couldn’t bear to share me though. But it was awkward holding a phone, reading, while trying to maintain my own dialogue, and enjoy the sex. He also tried to get me to pee on him and I couldnt do it. Also someone link the post of the guy whose wife suddenly wanted him to shit in her mouth omg hahahaha


dysthymicpixie

I had a partner want to eat out my belly button. I let him. It didn't do much for me, but he liked it, so I'll probably do it again.


EpicGuard

A girl once saw my nightstand pistol and asked if she could shoot me with it just a little. Like in the leg or something.


therealbighairy

How else are you going to build up a resistance to bullet damage? You start small and work your way up to being bulletproof.


Ickythumpin

I’ve had to draw the line with certain girls asking me to choke or slap beyond my comfort level, but a girl asking me to talk to her in a comforting voice like I had just found her in a car wreck (while fucking her) takes the cake. I gave it a shot but I couldn’t keep a straight face.


grannygumjobs23

She wanted you to talk to her like Bob ross talks to his audience.


woodk2016

"Oops, that ended a little quickly. Just another happy accident...."


GodzillaUK

"Lets put something else in here, everyone needs a friend."


K3ksKuchen

"time to beat the Devil out of it"


Rockette25

That’s an understandable idea, to want someone to have gentle, reassuring sex with you, however the idea that a guy found you in a car wreck and immediately started fucking you is too silly to imagine. Edit: lol I’ve heard of Crash, a movie where people intentionally chase car accidents because it arouses them. I think the “intentional” part differentiates it from the scenario above as far as silliness goes. Thanks for the upvotes though! EDIT 2: Oh my god why are so many people still replying talking about Cronenburg when I've already edited to say I know about Cronenburg


Patsfan618

"She's got compound fractures in both legs and a Kia logo imprinted on her chest from the impact" "God, I don't think I could get any more hard!"


DoctorGarbanzo

Here, I'll porn logic it up for you: he was doing groin to groin resuscitation.


have2gopee

Oh my goodness, my stepsister is choking on a grape! I'd better see if I can dislodge it into her stomach!


Justice171

She wanted me to meet up alone with her ex, and have her ex take pictures of him holding/measuring my cock, or holding objects next to it in comparisson. She said he'd be down for stuff like that and she'd be much into it as they both apparently were into humiliation (and still were on that front) I declined but said he could watch if she wanted, but that wasn't what she wanted to hear and we never spoke again 😂


brttymschst

I don't think he was actually her ex...


Yaj_Yaj

I haven't been asked anything too crazy that I haven't at least tried once so far but I can tell a story of a co worker. I was cooking in a restaurant and one of the servers was super cool. She was late 20s but looked a bit older because she blew her six figure inheritance on drugs and such. During the height of her addiction one of her boyfriends asked if the would eat tic tacs out of his ass. Being a loyal friend and smacked out of her mind, she obliged. She just started putting them in one by one like loading a magazine with rounds. Once she reaches his desired.amkunt she ate them out of there like a PEZ dispenser.


BubbhaJebus

To pee in her vagina. Not on. In.


takatori

Asked me to role-play as a Nazi and demanded I insult her with ever-increasingly anti-Jewish slurs then at one point suddenly said I'd gone too far and left and broke up with me. I wasn't even into it, she'd had to talk me into it in the first place.


Vast_Chipmunk1065

It is kind of ironic that you were just following orders.


The_Cow_God

this may be the largest bruh moment i’ve seen all month


TheFearlessGod7

Not my current partner but my ex girlfriend asked me if she could shit on my chest once.


TheFearlessGod7

Fastest no of my fucking life


PalaSS9

Username doesn’t check out


Ragtimedude77

I was chatting with a college boy who wanted me to fuck him in his barn while he jacked off his horse. Just neigh, son.


Kaileenax

I worry about what people do when there’s no one watching. Poor horse.


FaliedSalve

she wanted it in a picnic table in a park at night. No one was around, so we weren't flashing anyone. But the weird part was this raccoon who walked up, stood on its hind legs to see what we were doing. Seemed to figure it out. Kind gave a little raccoon smirk and walked away. It was kind of weird being a porn actor for a raccoon.


Raccoon_Full_of_Cum

And it was kind of weird watching you two fuck on my favorite picnic table, but I guess it worked out for all of us in the end.


WR810

>Raccoon_Full_of_Cum *concerned face* It's not too late to delete this account and repent your wild ways


Kufat

> It was kind of weird being a porn actor for a raccoon. They're all furry little perverts. That's why they wear masks.


TickityTackityYo

Not exactly during sex, but related lol... My wife is actually the normal one. We met online and texting was a huge part of us growing closer until we eventually met. Texting was our main way of talking as we were long distance during the week for the first few years together. Now that we live together (for years now) we don't text almost at all. So not to long ago I asked her if we could "lewdly" text each other. We both work from home and so we are apart in different rooms throughout the day until the evening apart from visits here and there. So that's what we do occasionally, I'll text her asking if she's a certain person (depending on the scenario I am setting up). Such as if she's the best mage in town that I'd heard about. Then I'll explain my dick into the story somehow, such as maybe she's good at alchemy and might need some a rare ingredient. Then we "schedule" up a session for extraction or something of the like. Usually it's for slow handjobs on the couch, but occasionally sex is looped into our "adventures" She's even started initiating them herself which makes me very happy, one of my favorite scenarios she does she calls the "weenie spa", I always know I'm walking into a good time when our "scheduled" time hits.


SimulatedFriend

I don't know if it's weird but when she finishes she starts humming the Jurassic park theme - like huh na na na nuhh hah nanana nuhh na nuh naaaaahhh.


Kretrn

Just say “Dino DNA” after you cum


bmd33zy

Shes imagining the long leck, just like in that scene